This week for me has been really really hard I have had really bad nights not sleeping or eating I am really really struggling with the emptiness and the loneliness without my beautiful wife all I have do e is cry and sobbing my shattered broken heart out every single day since I lost her 39 weeks ago I am stuck hear in our forever home that we built together we had moved hear to a new area and both wanted to start our new adventures together now I am stuck and I cant move on the house is full of memories dreams and things we still had to do together like the way we allways discussed things together we did do alot of work and everything we done we picked together and discussed everything together they are things hear that I can not touch I look around and all they is is the empty space our house was a very happy place and now it’s just sad and lonely without her just like me my wife was only 50 when she passed away I am the same age as her to soon it is a horrible roller coaster we are all on and it’s just not stopping I have cried not just a river but an ocean I honestly dont know how I am ment to try cope get through what ever time I may have left without her by my side the way it was meant to be we don’t have any family or friends because we never needed anyone we where happy in our own we bubble nobody askes me how I am not one person neighbours or work colleagues I am struggling like every one else I am glad we all understand each other in this site we are the only ones who truly truly knows what it is like we all have to be strong and be there when we need to ramble off I do get counselling but now he changed it from once a week to monthly and I do take anticipation tablets but I honestly do t know what is working anyway sorry for going on I am just really struggling take care
Please don’t apologise like you say this site is for us all to chat, rant etc in away it’s a comfort to have it. I’m 49 weeks in this new life and I am determined to live it the best I can as I know that’s what my husband would want. He wouldn’t want me to give up as I’m sure your lovely wife wouldn’t want you to give up either.
Take care
Was lovely to have your help and of course your company
Thanks to you, I’m as ready to move as I can be. Hopefully I’ll have a date soon.
The house already seems quiet 
I have a fairly busy week ahead, with a car MoT; night out with my guitar; let my house purchasers do some measuring and also a visit from my daughter and granddaughter. So no need for a list this week
Ah, bless you. I know that awful feeling when you’re missing your loved one so much it hurts. I’m just 11 weeks in and sitting here crying for my precious husband. I don’t know if it helps you that people on here understand how you’re feeling but I hope it does. Watching everyone else carrying on with their lives while yours has been shattered is so hard. Just know there are people on here who care about you.
Don’t apologise this site is for you to express yourself and your feelings. It’s so hard without our partners by our sides. We all understand on here you’re not alone in what you’re feeling. I sometimes think what would my husband want me to do . I try to be positive as I navigate my way round my new situation, it’s not always easy.
I am.really trying to do things for my wife I have professional lawn experts doing the grass in our back garden as we both where trying to get the moss and dead grass done and I have the local garden centre doing pots of flowers to as she was trying to grow some flowers in her pots but not much had come just a few pots we are not gardening ppl but we did our best we allways kept it nice and clean I have had 4 off her pots back but they is another 6 to still come back we had only just built a new fence last year just before she had passed so suddenly but this year I need to paint it all just everything is just so so hard without her by my side us discussing things together like we allways did her aking me things I am so heartbroken and lost without her I know we all struggle through this horrible life without our loved ones but it is really really difficult when you have nobody take care the best that you can
We can swop privately if you would like to but I’m not sure how you do that.
I have just sent a private message to see if it works. Let me know
Brummy,
I hope you managed today as best you could. I’ll be thinking about you tomorrow. Take care and try and remember something that will make you smile.
Lovely picture 
It’s just to let you know I will.be thinking of you tomorrow this is just so cruel this world I have not had a good week but I am truly thinking about you please try look after yourself the best way possible take care
Babycake,
I hope you are ok?Today was another hard day.this morning i walked up the village for a paper came back home and just burst into tears.coming back to the empty house i will never get used to then the significance of today and tomorrow is all really hitting me hard.I must have lines on my face like a road map with all the crying.I think i read somewhere that we never ?move on”but we do “move forward”maybe its because we have to move forward and try and rebuild our lives somehow,whether we want to or not.It really is a hard road we find ourselves on.Sending you hugs too.Take carex
Brummy, its so hard being on your own all of a sudden, the empty house is so horrible, i hate coming into it like you do too, I know what you mean about all the crying but you have to let it out, I am thinking of you, tomorrow will be another hard day for you, just try and be as strong as you can and let your tears out, take care, sending hugs to you x
Sherbert10,
Thank you so much for your kind message.i am dreading tomorrow its been a hard day today, i have cried a lot, i am dreading tomorrow but i am determined that as well as grieving i will try to honour my dear wifes memory the best i can.Take care and thank you for your kindness.
Nightwish1, its been another hard day.I went out to get a paper came back home just burst into tears.then late afternoon close to the time my dear wife passed the tears came again.I am dreading tomorrow but i know i will cry a lot but i am determined to honour my wifes memory.i will light a candle for her in the village church where she is.Thank you so much for thinking of me, it means a lot to me.
i hope you are ok?
Take care.
I know tomorrow will be a hard day for you . Get through it the best you can try to be strong . Try to think what your wife would want you to do
Love01,
Thank you so much for thinking of me, it really does mean a lot to me.I am so grateful for this site and everyones kindness and understanding.I have no friends and hardly any family , everyone has just dissapeared it seems now that were at my dear wifes funeral.You are really doing so well, looking after your garden and the garden centre helping with your plants.Your dear wife will be so proud of you.I am trying to keep my dear wifes pots and containers going.I got them blooming last spring and summer , that was my first summer without her, she was the plant and flower expert.i will try again this year.i look back in her diaries to see when she sent for the seeds and plugs and plants.i will do my best but i know i will not be as good as my wife.I am so sorry you have not had a good week.Its so hard for us this so called life we have now.I go to work, i have to pay the bills and buy food but know one really knows how i feel inside, i just carry on carrying my wifes love in my heart with me.Thinking of her constantly day and night.I did read somewhere that we never “move on’ but we do “move forward”probably because we have to move forward and try and rebuild, wheter we want to or not.I am thinking of you too.Try and take things step by step, moment by moment.Grief knows no time limit or direction.we have to do what is right for us.I so wish our dear loved ones were still with us.I miss my dear wife so much.I like to think our loved ones are with us spiritually and looking down on us and one day i so hope we will be reunited with them again.Its only these thoughts that keep me going i think, and the kindness of everyone on here too.
Look after yourself, that is so important.
Bit of a sleepless night so been awake since 5 watching TV in bed 
Anyway good morning all, think I’ll get up and have breakfast.
Try to have as good day as you can
Morning Everyone
Hope you have the best day possible .I start my cruise counselling this afternoon. Not sure what to expect, hope it helps