Goodnight i havent had a great evening either but tomorrows another day
Take care
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Love01
I wish I could help you ease your pain. But we here for you.
I can only imagine the pain you’re going through.
Virtual Big hugs from us here…
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The one thing i wish i could have is my beautiful wife back in my arms again thank you i really need support i love a cuddle
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Goodnight and thank you for sharing your time with us.
I find night time hard. Maybe one day sleeping wont be as difficult.
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I know…
I remember one of my thoughts was I would give up everything just give me back my husband back…
The longing to hear his voice, his laughter and even our fall outs, i dont care just to have him back… It was so bad that I felt I was seeing him just before i wake up in the morning…
the longing is something hard… when I just want my husband back so badly. I also remember crying like there is no tomorrow, I can see myself crying in the corner like crumbling to nothing. I can still feel that when grief hits me.
But having to read these messages is such a comfort that I dont feel alone…
night everyone…thank you for taking time to read it means a lot…
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@Edwars04
Thank you for your kind and understanding reply.
Just as you can relate to everything I say, I too, can completely understand everything that you describe.
I’m heartbroken for you and your pain and you are so right to say that the only people who can stop our loneliness are our husbands.
Me and my darling Michael, would always remember, recall, and share memories with each other, of things we had done, or places we had been to. “Do you remember when…”.
Such happy times.
Those very special memories of the times we spent alone together cannot be recalled or shared with, or by, anyone else.
They were “OUR” times, spent together, and I really miss that.
All of that shared history and memories, over so many years, just the two of us, are now locked away in the confines of my mind, and the ‘ONE’ other person with the same shared history and memories isn’t here anymore.
What could be more lonely than that?
I could cry an ocean at the sheer tragedy of it all.
If I am being honest, thinking of all the happy times spent with the love of my life, sadly, do not bring me much, if any, comfort at this stage.
All I can think about, like you, is that he should still be here, and we should still be having good times and making more memories.
He was taken too soon, he was too young, and he had everything to live for.
It just breaks my heart that his life was cut short, in such a cruel way.
I am also struggling to see a way out of this darkness.
We really are in a terrible place.
Eve x
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I know exactly what you mean i am the very same it was at the beginning when i was waking up in the morning i heard my wife call my name at first i got a fright jumped up and i did get a fright i said what the second time i heard it i woke up saying what up hunni i was allways a very light sleeper i woukd do anything just to have her back good night
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Its not easy to miss someone like how we miss them.
I am 7yrs now, kept my self real busy looking after my two children. Enrolled at college, then worked full time while studying. I just keep enrolling, studied then Uni but just before i finished it i had a mental breakdown. I kept my mind so busy that there is no space for grief. But I cant keep running like forest Gump… My body and mind was just done… i was off work for almost three months this is when i decided to get in touch with bereavement counselling. I have to deal with unprocess emotions of my loss. I was scared for a start because I dont know if I can cope with it.
I feel like I will crumble to nothing if I to deal with the pain. I dont go much to grave, i dont know in my head its just a reminder that my husband is no longer here. I know its silly… but im trying to keep him alive in my mind. the grave makes me feel the pain.
grief is such a complex emotion… it really drives me crazy. thats why its not easy and there is no right answer and I dont know what can make it easier.
im going to bed this time. I got carried away…
just think, we made it today. Hopefully tomorrow again.
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you just want it to be real.
Then I tried and go back to see if it would happen again. but it didnt, I just ended up crying.
I pray for all of us here.
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I would love it again i really would
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It is so hard isnt it i am 18mths along and as heartbroken as i was at the beginning i thought i was getting yhere slowly but then wham it hits you again. I get so emotional about everything i overthink everything. It just hurts so bad.
You dont want to be alone you want them back then you feel guilty because youve had the thought you dont want to br alone
It is absolutely soul destroying
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All i seem to be doing at the moment is sobbing. Its just so hard
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Where in Scotland are you from
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I know Daisy.
I needed help because when I feel the pain I dont want to be here anymore. And I feel bad thinking like that because of my children. Perhaps, one of the reason I left it so late and waited all these years to speak up because it is soul crushing and I get what others say you lost the will to live because thats how it feels.
Daisy we feel your pain.
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aberdeenshire
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even now im crying again.
I dont how much tears we need to make it easy for us.
My head is full… and tight… and my heart is crushing…
let it out Daisy. Its okay. we can cry together.
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I have said i dont wa t to be hear to more tha. Once i am ear glasgow
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I didnt think it was possible to have so many tears but they just keep coming
Its like a second wave if grief has hit me i just suddenly feel broken
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You just never know when its going to hit you.
I remember i was hearing children singing songs for Nativity. I just broke down in the middle of classroom and I went out I could not stop crying. I tried and tried to put on the brave face no matter how brave I was I did not manage to hold myself up. Its like I just want to cry in the corner and no one can console me.
I am struggling to hold it together… some days its ok. I know Im trouble by it deep inside me.
But speaking about it like right now it helps me to express my feelings.
Its okay Daisy, we can cry and maybe it helps both of us.
You are not alone we are here for you.
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hope its not too windy there.
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