I know I didn’t know he would pass away the age he did but I just need to try and take it day by day and get through this time
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Well it’s been 2 months and feels like yesterday sooner or later I no I have tell my self tina here by my side holding my hand talking what we going to do to day .doing something together just being here feel sad today looking at pictures on face book crying. Wishing this was a bad nightmare but it’s not it’s real and I’m struggling with day to day challenges I’m 62 almost 63 seems old well it is an my tina should be here But not just feel so low an down my hart bleeding not sure I can go on
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Martin2
I am but a few weeks ahead of you in my loss and real time nightmare.
I have had thoughts of stepping out of this world, without my husband of 40years it’s overwhelmingly unbearable .
What to do today all the discussions the plans the holding of hands.
I don’t think there is a formulae for this Martin. I know it takes courage and strength to face each day without our loved one alongside us.
I feel less alone when I read other peoples posts expressing the same things I am feeling.
We are of the same age you and I .
I write in a notebook how I feel what I miss .
I can’t look at photographs yet so Facebook memories that pop up I sadly go straight to delete.
My longest best friend died recently , our age. I had to find a photo album to give some photos to her brother, and not only seeing them but going through a cupboard full of my life with my husband to find that one I wept for what we had and what I no longer can have.
There will be a stepping stone although not yet where that special love we had with our loved one emerges through this pain we are feeling. Love is strength and it will guide us. I wish I had a religious faith of reuniting but I don’t. I envy those that do . So I have to find my strength somewhere else among the love I shared with my darling husband.
I’m glad you’ve reached out with your post .
Your not alone I will light a candle for you as well as for me .
One step breathe my friend. And hold on to love.
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Thankyou it’s raw life seems to go quick but now it seems to have stopped I am trying my best thoughts also to you will light a candle for both an all that has sadly passed just very tearful to day
Youre very early days … be patient with yourself. Course youre upset. Everybody on here has been there. Try to wrote in a journal to her - your feelings, thoughts. It really helps honestly. I do it loads especially at beginning. Keeps you close to them . And i cuddled his blanket and wore his jumpers and dressing gown. Take care xx
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Martin
Try to meet up with someone who knew you both today that’s not always possible .
Or keep posting on here. Keep reaching out today we all get times like this .
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My wife and I were together 25 years and married for 23 of those, she was my my. my lover, my best fried, my everything just as we all feel for our loved ones. The first signs of her illness started to appear in 2018. I find it difficult looking at the more recent photos of her as i try to remember her as she was. A bright intelligent professional, a teacher (SENCO) with a passion for helping those less fortunate.
My search for photos for her just giving gallery and her wake brought back a homogenous mix of happy and sad memories, my favourite was taken in LA in 2008 sitting in the sunshine with a glass of wine as our daughters were zooming around on Segways. She was my Sun Bunny and always will remember her that way
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How wired me too just keep breaking down floods of tears I don’t why xx
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I just think we have days that it really hits home, they’re not going walk through that door anymore.
Sometimes I wonder if the tears flow as well, because we’re getting through each day, and it feels like we shouldn’t.
I just keep telling myself that Kieron would not want be to be miserable because he is no longer here. He would want me to be happy because of the time we had together.
I miss him, but I also want to honour his memory and do some of the things we did, also go to places we spoke about. I know he will be with me, when I do those things xx
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Hi all.
It will be 5 months on the 16th March when I lost my Kev. It’s been a whirl wind of horrible emotions, up and very down. I have times where I can’t stop myself from crying, screaming, shouting but that’s grief. I hate it.
I have accepted my husband has gone and isn’t coming back. It doesn’t make things any easier with that pain in my heart. I’m lucky I have support from our girls and family who let me be me. The only thing that has helped me through this nightmare is going back to work and having distraction for most part of the day. Without this I know I would probably be in a very dark place.
There are no rights or wrongs we have to do what’s right for us. I live alone with my 3 fur babies (cats) who greet me when I get back to the house (I can’t call it home yet) which is a comfort to me. I talk to Kev all the time which is also a comfort, I can hear his reply sometimes in my head. I just hope one day we will be together again. All I can say to you all is, you must be kind to yourself, take your time to deal with your emotions, don’t suppress them, go with what’s right for you. Talk about your loved one, talk to them. Take each day as it comes and deal with that day. Tomorrow doesn’t exist yet. Im not me anymore and hardly recognise who I am. If I can get half of me back that will do. Take care all. This is a great place to put how we feel and pick up tips how to deal with loosing our loved one.
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does anyone know if there are face to face meetings ?
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Same here my husband passed last November it is hard the quiet and the nights just make noise radios TVs it is the only way light a candle and write in a journal these things have helped me may work for you failing that get a dog my to have been by my side they make great little listeners be strong xx
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I light candles , journal I’m on a phased return to work and I’m thinking later at some point I’m thinking of a dog for companionship.
I don’t like this life I cry a lot.
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Cried more this week xx just so so down don’t want to be here any more body hurts were probley not eating proper blood sugar levels 37 tried phoning doctors your number 20 odd in que can’t be bothered x
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Yeh there are some organised by sue ryder … have a look online to see if any in your area x
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Martin2
Try to take care of yourself . It’s hard to when you’re grieving . Book that appointment .
All booked this week plus mri scan neck shoulder arm pins an needle in hand hoping it comes up trapped nerve been like it 3weeks hope all have a good weekend sun out may be bit of garden to do keep me busy for a bit
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