I get what you say, I truly do, the world seems duller, blurred and I too struggle to think of a life without my Richard - I keep telling myself he would hate to see me this sad, I try to believe that that the more I tell myself this the the stronger I will become but…
The only way forward is for us to look at each day as it comes, when we get through that day it’s a small victory. It’s Richards funeral tomorrow, I am the only person going outside of his family, everyone else has sited covid as a reason for not going, I feel so angry but then I feel strong as I know I am still standing by his side when others aren’t. Richard passed away from brain cancer, covid meant his treatments were delayed, and/or simply didn’t happen. I refuse to be angry as it won’t bring him back but, on a good day, I prefer to be blessed that I had him in my life when some people have never been lucky enough to know that kind of love. Focus on that for your Tommy, you loved him, he loved you, there are people out there who have, and may not ever experience that joy and love, we must believe that we were the lucky ones to know how love truly feels xxxx