Good morning. You are very welcome. Another tough day. 7 weeks today since mam passed. I seem to live hour to hour. God bless and sending you all my love and support. Best wishes. Stephen. 
Hello, its been 7 weeks since my husband passed, i miss him so much, I miss our days together. Just watching TV. Talking, enjoying our grandkids, I miss him holding my hand, that intimacy that you only have with your partner, its all gone, Iām in my late 50s , its gonna be a lonely sad life without him. God bless you all
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Hello Lightmary68
Seven weeks is no time at all in a normal world. In our world, suffering the loss of the person closest to us, it seems like a lifetime.
When you think of major things that happen in life for example, moving house, holidays etc, it isnāt that what we miss but like you said, the ordinary everyday things.
In my case, this afternoon I felt a bit unwell and when I looked in the mirror I thought I looked unwell too.
When my beloved mam was alive I would ask her: Do I look okay mam? She used to say: come here Stephen. I got close to her and she put both her hands on my cheeks and said: you look blooming lovely Stephen. Mam always reassured me. This afternoon, mam couldnāt say that and it made me cry.
God bless and sending you my best wishes. Stephen
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Hello Stephen you did so much for your mom. Not a lot of people would do that for their parents, you sound like a remarkable person, may God bless you. Now we must focus on taking care of ourselves. God bless
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Thank you so much for your lovely, thoughtful and kind comments. It is very good of you to say so and I really appreciate it very much. God bless: Stephen.
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Another day without seeing anyone. I have been up to the cemetery this morning.
It seems that no one wants to know. Family wise i mean. No visits. All got their lives to lead while I am here alone.
9 weeks today since mam passed away. I did my usual ritual at her time of passing. Sat in the dining room where mamās bed was. Looking at her picture before, during and after the time she passed away. My brother and niece never mention it any more.
My uncle keeps saying get out somewhere. All the years with mam plus caring for her with Alzheimerās we did go out. Shopping and lunch in Doncaster. Local shopping and 6 visits a year to the hotel we stay at on the South Cliff at Scarborough.
The rest of the time I did not mind not doing anything else. I had mam and she had me and I looked after her all day every day.
I suppose some might think that i might be feeling sorry for myself, but 60 years is a long time and it only happened 9 weeks ago. If you come across the post. Thank you for reading it.
God bless and best wishes.
Stephen.
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Hello Stephen. It is also 9 weeks for me that I lost my husband, and its been very lonely without him, . You are still young enough to go out and find someone to share your life with, im sure your mam would have wanted that. Take care and God bless
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Thank you very much. 9 weeks for both of us. Does it feel longer than that to you? It does to me. It is lonely as you say.
Mam would want me to live my life, but i still feel mam was my life. Your kind words are much appreciated.
God bless and it is so kind of you to reply.
Best wishes Stephen.
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Stephen. On what day did your mam pass if you donāt mind me asking?
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The first few weeks, I used to wait for the hospital call, cry and say a prayer. I was cleaning our home, getting it ready before I went to the hospital to collect Mum - everything changed with that call. I will never forget the time. I have changed my ritual for a Saturday but only went it felt right for me. You have to do what you feel comfortable with in terms of going out. I went out straightaway, even though it was just for a walk and then I reached out to others and talked and talked. I knew that it would help me as thats what Mum did when my Dad died and it helped her. What would your Mum say to you Stephen? You will find the answer within yourself.
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Hi Lightmary.
She passed away at 11.45am on Saturday the 21st of March. A week after her 82nd birthday.
God bless and thank you.
Stephen
Hi Sparrow 2
Thank you as always for your care and compassion. I have submitted an application to volunteer with the Barnsley Library Service. I did it last Saturday but not heard anything yet.
Because me and mam saw very little of my brother and niece and mamās brother visited once a year, it meant that we relied on each other for company and friendship. We didnāt really have friends we could ask to help.or visit or speak with. It would have been good if we had. I could not leave mam on her own so if my brother could not come down to sit with mam, I took mam with me on my hospital appointments.
I will see a way through at some point. Thank you again for keeping in touch. God bless and all my best wishes Stephen.
Hello Stephan65, my husband also passed on that day. 
its still too raw for us. Take care and God bless you
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It is very raw for us . Thank you for your replies. It really helps and I do appreciate it very much.
God bless and all my kindest regards Stephen
Donāt worry about what other people might think. Youāre entitled to your grief when youāve lost the most important person in your life. Itās not just losing that person, your mam, your whole life has changed, your routines, your hopes for the future. Your posts are always so eloquent and so descriptive of how much you loved her. The lack of empathy from some people astounds me. Iām eight months into grief now after my partner of 40 years died suddenly and I still struggle. Thereās no timeline for grief youāre still very early on in yours. Take care.
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Norma 1
Thank you ever so much for your beautiful message. It made me cry, but in a good way. It is so nice to have your support and acknowledgement. Without mam, everything has changed and bless you for saying that I need to take as long as I need to grieve mam.
My mamās brother , my uncle rang yesterday afternoon. Because I donāt get much of a chance to speak about mam and how I feel, I was giving free rein to how I was feeling. He said, if I donāt start to do something or go out more, he cannot see a way forward for me. I told him i go out, but I canāt be out all the time. I have tried volunteering for the library service and I am waiting to hear from them.
Even though mam was his sister, they were never alike and as I said before, we were lucky to see him once a year. Life for him hasnāt changed.
This is why your message means so much to me. If mam was alive, sheād say those things, but I donāt hear anything like this from my brother or uncle.
God bless and thank you again very much. Sending you all my kindest regards and best wishes. Stephen .
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