Deb5…
I know exactly how you are feeling…
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@LonelyLady
“Everything I am now having to do (paperwork) feels like I am erasing him from my life and I don’t want that at all.”
I finalised everything for my late partner last week and my immediate reaction was that there was nothing left for me to do for her and someone said to me well that’s like a full stop then. After thinking about it I said, no, it’s just a comma. A full stop would be when you’re gone and no-one thinks of you and that will never be the case
“I’m hoping that at some point family/friends may ask me to go along on a holiday with them may be but I don’t want to expect that from them or to assume that they may think of me.”
You’re right - people will get on with their own lives. I’ve noticed a drop-off in contact from many people since her funeral but the real friends are still there for me. I can’t stop people disappearing & neither can you, but don’t let it stop us getting on with our lives
I hope you can find social activities that suit you and that will allow you to move forward and discover some new friends.
Ah no it is not a full stop. You willl never forget the love he had for you just like i wont with my husband. Why do prople want you to forget them ! It really annoys me ! I love to remember the lovely moments i had with my husband 
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On you recommendation I bought and read Sasha Bates book…thank you…it helped so much…I totally related to it…
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Oh brilliant! Im glad it helped 
i loved it too … felt sad to finish it actually cos so understood where she was coming from ! You know i sent her a message on facebook to tell her how helpful it was and she replied ! She said thank you and so sorry you are on this journey but all the best . Xx
Yes …amazing book…also sent a message…no reply yet but her book really helped understand what is happening to me…and has given me a little hope …
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Did you ? 
took about a week to get a reply but she did reply it does really help doesnt it - bless her for writing it and giving us all hope that life can improve xx
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Deborah there is no shame in asking for help, I wish I had done months ago but I can be very stubborn, the hardest part is admitting to yourself that you do need help the second is then asking for it, don’t struggle alone please.
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@Deborah1 @Freedomlass
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness (imo). In fact I think it can be a really brave & honest thing to do. You’re being honest with yourself that something needs attention and brave because it’s a bloody hard thing to do to ask for help sometimes when human nature tells us to suck it up and just put a brave face on. I hope you find the support you need Deb.
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Help comes in many forms and I do feel for those who don’t feel they have any. I still feel lost some days I have an abundance of help if I need it. Do I always ask for it, no but it’s there if I do. I also have a therapist, who I now see fortnightly and that has been good. It enables me to say things that I don’t want to talk to family and friends about. Someone unattached who didn’t know him and won’t be hurt if I say something they don’t want to hear.
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Yeh its like your safe place isnt it ! I had his blanket wrapped around me last night so i could feel close to him 
My darling husband suddenly died six weeks ago - I also have very supportive family and friends. I don’t know how to live without him - as with you, we were so happy and deeply in love after 34 years together. Rick was 76 and I’m 73. I can relate to your words. Please know that I’m with you in grief. xx Linda
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Sorry for your loss. Its very recent for you. I was married to my husband for35 years …lost him in december. So hard isnt it. Hope youre ok and chat on here whenever you want. People are really kind and understanding xxxx
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Thank you so much - it is good to share in this way. I’m sorry to hear about your husband. This grief is an alien land - my parents and brother are gone, but losing the love of my life is utterly unbearable. Take care and go as gently as possible.
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The pain does get better you know. It subsides but i still have bad days i have to confess … xx
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@Lin49
I’m so sorry you too are on this grief journey with so many of us. I had never understood how much harder the loss of my husband would be compared to other losses.
Keep gaining support from those on here but I’m also pleased to know you face good family and friends to help too.
Love and hugs
Karen xxx
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Thank you so much, Karen. Although grieving is very individual, I feel we’re all joined by loving support - a great gift from Sue Ryder. Take good care of yourself.
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Hi
I lost my husband two years ago and although that initial shock has left me I will forever carry the sadness that goes with it. I volunteer at a local food bank and a support worker came across a small dog whose owner had to go into care. I took it as I know my grandchildren will love her and now she’s a major part of my life. She doesn’t do much (we think she’d been neglected) and a little nervy but gradually she’s coming round. She’s taken out regularly and to me it’s a welcome distraction - something to care for.
I’ll take all the help I can get so thank you Bella
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Thats amazing!
@Georgie15 Pets can be so comforting. My dogs have gone now, but they brought years of enjoyment. I have 3 Bantams and this young lady now - a present from my late partner.
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