I just sit here doing nothing or play stupid games on my phone and have no get up and go. I have mental health problems anyway and my husband dieing has made it worse. I do what i have to do for my son like cook dinner and washing up and we do go out sometimes. But the rest of the time i just sit and do nothing and it’s feels like im waiting for him to come back and of course I know he’s not and me and my son are so miserable without him here 
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I do a lot of sitting doing nothing as well Judy. I do manage to lose myself in a book when I am feeling really miserable. It takes my mind off my own miserable life. When the weather is ok I find that being in the garden helps. But today is cold and wet, so reading it is.
I make myself keep the house clean and I cook once a day because of my daughter. But I am nothing like the person I used to be.
Hugs xx
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I felt I’ve done the same for a few months, I don’t even have the motivation of having children or pets to care for.
Thinking about it though… I imagine it’s part of the grieving process, allowing everything to muddle it’s way round your brain and hopefully, at some point, form some sort of order …
Hugs
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It’s hard to pick yourself up when something bad happens to you and I’m trying to get my son motivated when I’m not helping myself and we are so miserable after our lose i have my daughters around to help us sort stuff out and I’m lucky to have family around me. But they have life’s and all work and have kids or husbands and partners and im taking up time from them because I don’t want to be on my own. But i do evenings and night without them. X
Judy10 all of us who are replying to you and reading each others texts on here are sitting doing nothing…kind of. It is so very early days for you and it does not matter that you sit all day, just make sure you try and get some nice food during your day. How old is your son ? I am sure he will be a comfort for you and you for him and you will both start to inch out into life again, it is just a little too early perhaps.
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It’s so difficult and I’m so 
and I just have so much that needs doing and i just sit here and im eating because I’m diabetic and half the time i don’t want to. My son is 20 but has autism and lost his first dad when he was 8 and now his second dad just before his 20 birthday. Hope your doing OK x
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I did the same
I knew a walk would do me good but kept putting it off then one morning at 5:30 I went for a walk, it really helped. No one really about so I let the tears fall and talked to my husband as I walked past places we had walked together
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I feel the same just sitting and crying. Waiting for the hours to pass. Hoping that maybe it’s all a mistake. Like a bad nightmare! But it isnt. Life is so cruel to us all. Hopefully one day we will lstart to see some light. Big hugs xx
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I often cried out, why me !!
But I wouldn’t wish this pain on anyone
We will see the light, a little at a time, just writing this gives me hope.
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@Judy10 That sounds very familiar. I feel the same and me and my daughter are miserable without my husband too. And because we are doing the things we need to do to live every day, I feel that other people think we’re moving on but inside we’re just numb. Sending a hug to you and your son x
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Morning and it’s really difficult to carry on but because you have your daughter and i have my son. We have to look after them because my son has lost 2 dad’s and only has me. It’s hatd to fight every day because we are so miserable without him. Thinking of you and your daughter x
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I don’t want her to be miserable and I know she is partly miserable because of me being so sad and lost. I hope she can move on with her life - that’s what we want for our children isn’t it.
I didn’t lose my parents until I was much older and it’s seems so hard on them. X
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It’s really hard on the children and my son is 20 but has autism and anxiety and today was the first time in nearly 6 weeks he was like himself more and he sees me cry alot and that don’t help. I try and go out with him because I don’t want to be at home and getting out helps. Xx
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Im glad to hear he’s had a better day. It’s so hard. I hardly have the energy to cope with my own grief let alone my children’s grief so I know it must be really hard for you as your son has autism and anxiety. We can only do our best. Getting out definitely helps. Distraction is good. Sending hugs xx
Hey hope your doing OK as can be and i hate Sunday and my husband died 6 weeks today and my daughter worked from my house to keep me company 
the last 2 days my son has been going back on his xbox and I’m so happy for him 
but I’m more on my own now and i won’t tell him because he has suffered enough. It’s so hard for us all right now and i feel your pain xx
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I feel so ungrateful as my family and friends are doing so much to support me but the fact is that no one can replace the companionship and closeness of a 40 year relationship and the loneliness that comes with his absence. I am so grateful to be connected to you all because I know you understand. I certainly didn’t understand before it happened to me because I never gave it much thought even when I knew he had a terminal illness. So thank you for your support x
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I only had my husband 16 years and he only lived with us 11 years and like you my family have been amazing. But not having my soulmate my world with me and supporting me and making me feel good about myself it’s so horrible so i understand your pain and everyone else’s xx
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I’m struggling too. I’m on edge a lot. I want to be happy here in our home that we loved so much but I just feel tense.
The tears fall so easily but sometimes I’m scared to really let go in case I can’t find a way back
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You need to really let go that’s how you will get back, it is almost frightening when you do let go, you will feel intensely sad, breathless, dizzy, sick, you might think you will faint …but you wont, let the grief out, scream, cry, shout, weep and weep it is healing and it will help you. It might not seem like it at the time but it will.
Afterwards you will feel some calm for a while. sort of serene and almost relaxed, you will also be exhausted, rest and try to relax a little.
The grief will build up again but each time you release it will get a little less till you are able to start re building your life.
We are all on here to help each other and it does help being on here.X
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@Woolly I do understand what you mean. I’m scared too to let go completely because I’ve never felt out of control feelings like this before. Tense is a good way to describe how I feel at the moment too. I feel very anxious and I’ve never been an anxious person before. It is comforting to know that you understand because you’re going through the same thing.
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