Thank you for your kind words @KarenF, you’re right, it’s a good thing we didn’t dwell on the possibility of sudden loss. Similar to you, I noticed the shock on people’s faces when they’d heard it was a heart attack, nobody would have expected this to happen on a fit, healthy, active man fulll of life, just like you described your husband.
What can we do? At least, we have this site where we can pour our hearts out and everybody will understand and support each other.
Sending a hug to you back.
Thank you for your kind words @Deb5, yes, being alone without our soulmates is literally like we’ve been cut in half.
Thank you for your kind words @Jul2113, and thank you for your encouragement. Sharing with each other on this site is helping us in our struggle, knowing we can always come here any time of the day, and “talk” to each other offering comfort, empathy and a shoulder to lean on.
Go wear your suit to your daughter’s graduation with pride @Solost, your husband will be right beside you cheering on your daughter’s achievement. I think the necklace is a wonderful gift for your daughter, something I am sure she will treasure for ever. When we find our true love we do feel it will be forever, and in some ways it is. Death doesn’t change that, I will carry the love I experienced and shared with my husband in my heart forever, and when we meet again we will just hold hands and pick up just where we left off. Much love xxxx
What lovely words @sandi. I am with you there, the love is forever and we will carry it with us until we meet again.
Hugs xxx
Thank you so much @sandi, beautiful, comforting words. You’re right, we will all be forever together with our soulmates, not even death can take that special bond away from us.
A hug to you.
It’s so soon after your loss I lost my husband at Christmas and I still cry most days sending hugs be kind to your self losing your sole mate hurts like hell:broken_heart:
Me too … week before xmas … awful xmas xx
There is no time limit on our grief, no time limit on letting the tears flow, there will be better days (I can’t say good days yet) other days not so much, it’s much like the ocean that comes in tides, high tide for those days when all we seem to do is cry, when the tide goes out for when we can talk, look at photos and remember the memories without those tears but with a smile, I mentioned before, (sorry for repeating myself) I had started to have more of those better days in the run up to Christmas but since then I crashed and burned, that tide had come in like a hurricane and was relentless to the point I felt like jumping into that ocean, I don’t know if it was Barrie talking to me or if I just gave myself a good talking to but I didn’t jump I screamed for help instead as I didn’t want to drown, not deep down, but why after 8 months did it hit like that? I just hope that hurricane doesn’t return and can weather any storms that may still come, I know there will be a few to contend with, but I will fight, I have this safe haven I can come to where all you good people are that will throw a life jacket.
I lost my husband approximately 4 weeks ago. He died suddenly of a heart attack. We had just moved into a new rental property 4 days before. I would not have been able to afford the rent on my own, so i had to move back in with my mum. We had 3 dogs and a cat, 2 of the dogs and the cat, i had to rehome as my mum didnt have the space. This felt like another heart break, eventhough i managed to keep one of them. Friends and family have been so supportive, but i kind of get the feeling they think its 4 weeks and i should be getting over it by now. I miss him so much, all i want is a big hug from him.
@Grainne1974 I’m so sorry for your loss of your loved one. Four weeks is no time at all and this is not something to ‘get over’. It is something that becomes part of this new unwanted life and we all have to find our way to live with it. The separation from your pets is also hard. You will find empathy on this site as we are all struggling as we share our experiences. Love and support xx
Thank you Mike
My husband of 47 years went cycling suffered a cardiac arrest and despite receiving CPR really quickly and the air ambulance coming he didnt regain consciousness and died in ITU 5 days later. We had talked about organ donation as a family and offered his organs he was therefore able to give 4 families a second chance at life. Its only a week since it happened and I am in freefall. Everything has changed and despite all my lovely friends and family i feel so lost and scared. I am reading about grief and have recently lost my dad to cancer, but this is a different level. We met as teenagers and had such plans for our retirement together. I just dont know how to get through each day. Losing your new home and your pets must be so hard.
Aw so sad for you. And so young xx
So sorry @Grainne1974 such a terrible tragedy, like @Mike75 says 4 weeks is no time at all and you will never ‘get over it’ we just learn to live with it, which takes time, patience and support. Losing your pets at the same time, must have been so hard and another loss for you to carry. I know how you miss those hugs, I miss them too, along with the intimacy you share as a couple such as the stroke of his hand on my cheek, and the looks we gave when we knew what each of us were thinking. I hope you can still carry them in your heart. Sending you love and a big hug xxx
@Freedomlass
What a moving post and describes very well the waves of grief. I have had a tide coming in time recently at 11 months and with the prospect of the 12 month time, anniversary and birthdays.
Friends (from here and former friends) and family are such a help stopping us from drowning so thank you to all of you who help.
Sending you hugs with all you are dealing with and have lost. It is so recent and this grief journey is long and winding. Try not to expect too much of yourself and be open with others about how terrible this loss is. They cannot truly understand but don’t be pressurised into allowing them to believe it’s anything other than what it is.
It is almost a year since I lost my darling husband very suddenly and I feel I’m doing pretty well on the whole. That doing pretty well though, still includes days with tears, days when something overwhelms me and I think I can’t cope. I am, however, having a life again. It’s very busy and sometimes I wish it were less so but I go out and do activities which I enjoy. There will be a life ahead should you push yourself to make it but it’s very early days to worry about that at the moment. Just think about landing from day to day, or even hour to hour.
Love
Karen xxx
I’m so sorry for your loss. My wife passed away aged 50 last February. She too had cancer but died after just 6 weeks but we did get her home. I have two Dogs one who joined me in February, a rescue called Katie, that was going to be the name of the daughter we couldn’t have together. I am truly heartbroken and Easter was just dreadful, just made the loneliness even worse. A year on and its still so hard, as others have said we had plans x
Isnt it awful that bereavment leaves all these lonely people ? Its just not.fair