“I missed you quietly today. So quietly that no one noticed.
I missed you as I climbed out of bed and as I brushed my teeth; when I waited at the lights on the drive into work and as I heard the rain outside my window.
I missed you as I ordered lunch and as I kicked off my shoes when I got home; as I switched off the lights and climbed into bed for the night.
I missed you without tears or noise or fanfare.
But oh how I felt it.
I felt it in the morning, at lunchtime, in the evening and at night. I felt it as I woke, as I waited, as I worked. I felt it at home, on the road, in the light, in the dark, in the rain.
I felt it in every one of those moments, each one sitting heavier and heavier as the weight of me missing you kept growing and growing.
Yes, I missed you so quietly today.
But I felt it so loudly.”
It’s true if you’re griefing for the loss. But what if your griefing for loss and for deceit at the same time. It’s really hard as my emotions are so mixed up. To the point that i dont know how im suppose to feel. People tell me you need to seperate the loss from the deceit , in order to process it. But i dont know how ? How can you love someone but hate them as well!
I too have that feeling every day since my wife passed away.I miss the sharing of the days events and the silly moments.I miss the conversations and laughter.Life feels so much emptier now without her, it’s like life just carries on around me but things feel different for me now and I don’t feel quite so connected to that life because when my wife passed away she took my soul with her to hold until we meet again.
