He was there my late husband, just out of the corner of my eye, standing in the garden, i was so excited i turned towards the back door, and then the reality hit me. i had a good cry, but it was a nice moment to think he was there. has this happend to others who have lost their partners? is it just a trick of the brain/wishful thinking?
I generally see my husband when I am really stressed like you in the corner of my eye. Just after he passed in March a cold night I lay on the sofa fell asleep with the fire full on I had left doors unlocked I felt someone squeezing me I thought someone was in the house shot up with a fright it was 2 in the morning the lounge was red hot I’m convinced it was Mick waking me up telling me to go to bed lock up and turn fire out. X
I too, when walking through our home, catch something in the corner of my eye, I turn around and there is nothing there so I put it down to a shadow from the sun in the window. What I have experienced when in bed is that the side of the bed where my husband always slept, goes down, as if someone has sat on the side of the bed and I feel his arms around me squeezing me very tightly. The day he died, I came home from hospital and told our sons I wanted to be alone so they went home and I crawled into our bed, we still slept in the same bed together, the oxygen cylinders and medical equipment were still on the floor where the paramedics had left them when they took him into hospital for the last time. I lay there crying my eyes out and then I felt his arms go around me and squeeze me so tightly that I fell asleep and I knew he had come to say goodbye, but it happened again and again over the years. It has now been six years since he died and this is the first year he has not been to visit me. Perhaps he is telling me that I am now alright and I don’t need to be comforted anymore, how wrong he is. I sometimes lay awake on a night, just waiting for the side of the bed to go down so I know he is back with me.
I am a great believer in the afterlife so I know one day we will be together again. It has been six years without him but I am six years closer to seeing him again.
Hi the bed I look at his side it’s like the quilt is moving like someone is breathing it’s all so strange. X Does it get easier to live with x
Once when i was in bed, it was if i could feel my husband rest his hand on my hip, that was how he went to sleep.
i wasent scared just reasured.
Lonely, its a lovely way of thinking six years closer. I am only a few months down the line, I dont look to far ahead, the future scares me and seems to empty. My husband was 58 when he died and I am 56.
Kim5 i would be freeked out if i saw the quilt moving!!
I feel comfort in the bed it’s strange isn’t it. Know what you mean about the future even with my family I feel so lost. I’m 59 in September Mick was 64 when passed away but so young for our ages so it’s going to be a long journey. X
To all the above posts. I began a thread ‘Psychic phenomena’ Have a look and if you want post your experiences on there. Nothing any of you have said surprises me in the least, but I see with pleasure that none of you seem to have been afraid, apart from one. What you are all seeing may not be ‘imagination’ but a reality. So many of us have psychic abilities which so often can be misconstrued as something ‘weird’ and so are put off any such experience happening again. To me at least there is nothing strange about any of it. It does bring comfort, of course it does, but it goes a lot deeper than that. They are still with us and if they can will look after us, But disbelief stops any such events from happening. Keep an open mind and allow things to happen without fear.
Blessings and love to all. John.
Yes Jonathan, they are still with us and that is what keeps many of us going, knowing that one day we will be together again.
I will definitely look for the post you mentioned as this type of thing is one of my interests as I have grown up in a family that goes back to my great, great grandma and perhaps further, now our 15 year old granddaughter has the ability. She used to be afraid but after I had a talk with her, she has accepted it. I experience things but never actually see a deceased person standing in front of me like my granddaughter, sister, mum, grandma etc. did. All I know is that I can sense and feel things without actually seeing them.
Hi. Shiela. You will see from my thread that my wife had the ability to see the so called ‘dead’ She did not communicate with them or touch them, but she saw tham as clearly as if they were alive. As a child she was told not ‘to be silly’ so she stopped telling people. She very rarely told anyone, only those who would understand. Sadly, so many with this ability have been put off by ridicule. There is a book available on Amazon called ‘The Boy who saw True’. Worth a read. He too was ridiculed. It does run in families this gift. And it is a gift and one we should cherish. I don’t have it, but that does not matter. I was as sceptical as the next man until I made a study of it. What I read and heard has convinced me beyond any doubt that another dimension does exist, and that there is no such thing as death. Appearances can be deceptive. We are brought up to believe in life and death. ‘Everything must end’ they say. Must it? Does anything actually end or just take another form? When we see something that may frighten us ask what is it and why. Never be afraid of it. The window into another world opens and closes. We have no control over it. Genuine mediums have the ability to keep the window open a little longer.
I am not a Spiritualist. I prefer to keep it simple. Why make a religion of it?
You are so wise to explain to your granddaughter what it all means. A simple talk an explanation is all that’s needed.
Take care and keep posting. John.
Thank you John. It is very rare for someone to admit that a member of their family see the dead. I have lived with this all my life, it runs in the female line.
Our granddaughter, from being tiny, used to look into the corner of the room and laugh, our German Shepherd dogs used to sit and stare into the corner of the room, always the same corner. I think we are so lucky but we tend to say nothing unless someone else mentions it first. I have been stopped by a gypsy in town, not trying to sell me anything but to tell me that I have the gift, what passersby must have thought when I was chatting away to this little old scruffy lady for half an hour whilst she was telling me all about the life I had lived it was uncanny what she knew about me, It was really uplifting. When I was walking away from her she shouted out to me that I was loved by our two sons and husband. I told Peter when I got home and he was none too pleased that I had stopped to talk to a gypsy woman, he was not a believer so I never used to tell him when things happened.
Hi Sheila 56 I’m so glad for you I wish it would happen to me all I remember is seeing his face in my sons neck curtain when I told my son he said don’t be silly so he took a picture of the net and there was my husband‘s face he couldn’t believe it
How I envy you all. I would give everything for just one more sight of him or to feel his hand in mine. I look at videos I made of us over the years and see him smiling at me but that’s all I have. I just want him back.
I think it happens when you are not waiting for it to happen. Little things like finding white feathers everywhere when you don’t have feathers in the house, i.e. feather pillows, duvets, cushions. Walking into a store in a shopping centre and a white feather comes floating down in front of you, your grandson giving you a stick of rock he bought on his holidays for you and when you take it out of the bag there is a white feather stuck to it. A certain song starts to play when you walk into a coffee bar or store. These are some of the things that may happen to you but you don’t think anything about it at the time.
The times I have put down a pen, my glasses my phone and turned to pick them up but they are gone, so I go around the house and upstairs, come back down and they are there where I left them.
Sometimes we are so wrapped up in our grief that we miss what our loved ones are trying to tell us.
I have never seen my husband since he died but I have felt his arms around me when I am in bed. For the first 12 months of him dying, every night I was woken up by him shouting my name, very loud and panicky as though he could not find me. I jumped out of bed to see to him, thinking he was still here then I realised he had gone. The second year I heard him call my name every night but this time, very gently, Sheeeelaaaa then the third year, nothing. Someone once told me that when a person has been very, very ill and then passes away, it takes time for them to heal in heaven before they have the strength to come back and check on us.
It is six years for me now and for the last 12 months there has been nothing at all. Perhaps Peter knows I am now alright and I don’t need him anymore. but like I said in another post, the longer I am without him the more I need him.
Oh @Lonely at feels me with dread. John always had dreams where he had lost me. It was a constant and I always told him I would find him. He depended on me for everything and me him. I worry so much that he is trying to find me and doesn’t understand what happened. He died very suddenly with a massive heart attack at 4am. No warning. He was dead when I lifted his face before the paramedics came.
I am so terribly sorry, I really am. I think it is much harder to come to terms with the death of a lov ed one when you lose them suddenly, without warning or after a very short illness because you have not had time to prepare for what would eventually happen.
My Peter started being ill eight years before he died and it was a steady decline. The last three years of his life was like living on a knife edge, not knowing if the next hospital visit would be the last. Not knowing what the next day would bring.
I will say that those eight years gave us the chance to be together at home day in and day out. He took early retirement at 60 as he did not feel well and was diagnosed with his illness shortly afterwards, we were able to do what we both wanted to, have tea in the garden and just talk about the good old days but there was one thing he would never discuss and that was dying, so we lived a life of planning this and planning that, even though we knew the things we planned would never happen but that was the way he wanted it.
I can look back and know I did everything I could, I cared for him 24/7, he refused any help from anyone else, he only wanted me.
I was prepared for the end but it knocked the life out of me when it happened because we had been together from 1964, we were two halves of the same person so I honestly don’t know how you are coping with the sudden shock of losing your soulmate.
Please take care.
@Lonely it’s hard to imagine which terrible thing is easier on those left behind. You had time to talk but your darling had ill health and a long decline. That must have been very hard but I bet you made the most of every moment together. It sounds as if you kept positive for each other. Such a lovely story. John was like a switch being turned off so no time for goodbye. We made the most of every moment together including the last day. Who can say? All we know is that for the one left behind we are just a shell of our former self. Outside I can smile and have even laughed. Inside I am screaming and begging for him to come home.
Like so many here, my June has been back a few times - feathers and a Robin. I know it was her, I was doing something in the garden, turned round and it was there, looking at me. I don’t know how long we looked at each other, but it was June. Since she went I felt her near, but the last few days, I’m not so sure. Maybe those who’ve passed have a new life(?) to start, but I’m not ready for her to leave me behind.
I think that it’s no use to look for signs, when they are ready, they let us know.
Take care all
All I can say after being on my own for six years is that there is nothing you can do but live day to day. Our loved ones would not want us to spend the rest of our lives grieving for them but the reality is, that is what we will do. We do survive and we do learn to live a different life, albeit not the life we thought we would be living.
Please take care.
That is so true, there are signs out there that perhaps you take for granted but after a while the penny, so to speak, starts to drop and then you realise that seeing feathers everywhere you go where there should not be feathers, and walking into a store and your favourite music starts to play is no coincidence and that your loved ones are letting you know they are around. A couple of years after Peter died, our son told me that he and his then fiance were sitting outside a coffee bar and it was really breezy, the napkins kept blowing off the table but suddenly, this white feather floated down, it wasn’t swaying about in the breeze as it should have been but fell straight down and landed on our son’s fiances lap. Peter had only met our son’s fiance once before he died as our son had just started going out with her but Peter had told our son that he thought she was a lovely girl. Our son said he was certain it was his dad sending him a sign that he was happy for them both. Since then they got married and have a two year old son who Peter has never seen but we show him photos of his granddad so he will grow up knowing who he is.
I still have Peter’s ashes and they are staying with me until it is my turn to go and our sons know they have to be scattered together in a place we both loved.