Here is a sky full of stars just for you Kate. Hasn’t it been magical to see them with less pollution over the last months 
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I’m sitting here with a big grin on my face Sandra 
- thank you. 
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I understand as well, I lost my beloved just over a year ago. My love for him has not changed. At first, any words spoken to me about, looking down, he’s in your heart and memory or he’ll always love you, was very difficult to hear and I was angry all the time, didn’t want to be told any of that! But, I will say , with time , it does get easier to cope and respond (or not) to people’s words. Life is difficult and there is nothing worse then losing a part of your heart but always try to believe in you too! What love and contribution you can give to others.
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My angel is with me as all your partners are with you . Its nothing to do with religion at all . Its energy . !
I love it Pat . Your Brian is constantly letting you know he is with you . Xx
Hi. Flyfish. ‘What love and contribution you can give to others’. Oh yes indeed! That’s what this site is all about, and what we should all be doing having suffered just about the worse pain any human can take. Since my wife died I have certainly been more aware of the suffering around me. I don’t dwell on it, that’s not good, but to be aware of it when before I was somewhat indifferent is a step forward. Maybe it takes pain to make us aware. Another thing that has happened is an awareness of so much kindness from those who have helped me along this difficult path. Yes, there are those who don’t seem to understand and don’t want to. But the kindness is far more than the indifference. We know when someone is sincere and we appreciate their goodwill.
Love and kind thoughts. John.
“Believe in yourself too” such wise words, thank you.
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Reading your post Patti made me remember how a clock which hadn’t worked for at least 2 years and was an antique wind up one whose hands you had to move manually lifting off the rickety glass front, suddenly said 10.10. For years it was on 8.40.! My son, whose wall it’s on, often used to at 10.10! But how could that have happened? It was very early days!
I actually get great comfort in anything ‘weird’ happening now. I feel no fear except for the immediate shock of something falling and voices in the night.
xx
Hi Jonathan,
Indeed! My car engine light came on yesterday and those warning lights scare me, I drive a lot for my job. With not having my beloved anymore, I had to figure out the problem! So, to make a long story short, I went to a Auto Zone and they helped me figure out , my gas cap needed to be replaced and saved me hundreds of dollars. With being on my own now (still missing my partner mad) I have become stronger in ways I didn’t know I could. Times are tough and I miss him so much but , I know I can survive. Life faces us with so many obstacles, liked or not. Learning how to cope with them is huge! Stay strong to all who read!
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Agreed Pat! We have two soap dishes in our bathroom, one has quite a big rectangular soap and the other a much smaller oval one. For some reason, maybe the Aspergers , Malcolm didn’t ever use the rectangular one, said it was too big( although he had lovely big strong hands) One morning I went in and “his” soap was lying next to the dish, it really felt like he’d paid a visit 
And Flyfish, I do believe we can become stronger than we thought. Baby steps for me, but I’ve sorted internet banking, worked out i player, catch up etc(Malcolm had always done any thing technical) and I’m now a dab hand with the gorilla glue ! Oh, and I’ve got good at lighting the fire, previously an abysmal failure! Feels like it’s good to grow. Sending isotope vibes and love x
We have a digital radio clock in our bedroom. My husband always did the reset manually when the clocks changed. This clock changed automatically in March 2018, a few weeks after my husband passed. I had to find instructions on the internet and found it would only change automatically if the radio was tuned in and switched on. It hadn’t been, in fact we never actually used it as a radio as it was poor reception . It only happened once, since then I have had to change it each time but I do speak to him as I do it (his photograph sits beside it) 
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Sandra, there are definitely things we can’t explain and nice to think it could somehow be them, whatever you believe. Nice to have your HUD’s band’s photo near to your clock. Ours on in our son’s. House high up, so not so easy! But I do have lots on the bedside shelf. I love your stars by the way. they are beautiful. Keep believing! X
Hi I’m not sure how or why anyone may not ’ believe’ . If the spirit world does not exist then where does people think our loved ones go ? Just swatted like a fly ? There is life after life . That is no disrespect to anyone as everyone on here is so lovely and grieving terribly .i feel for us all so much . 
xx
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Me too, this site is a life saver for me, so much support and empathy but as you said, so much grief . And we can’t make it go away , just feel so incredibly sad for everyone. Yes, spirits have to go somewhere but I can’t make myself believe Malcolm’s watching over me from up there, that just feels more than I can imagine. I think I feel his spirit’s with me in our house, I feel very safe here and previously had been easily unsettled when I was on my own. Centuries ago before we got married, people didn’t live together and Malcolm always patiently looked under the bed and in the wardrobe of my flat when he brought me home at night. He would only go when he was sure I knew there was nobody lurking, what a lovely man! It never occurs to me here, wonder if that’s because the worst’s already happened so nothing to fear? Lots to think about. x
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Beautiful thought though hey, bjane? I love to think my husband is watching over me. 
Hi. bjane. ‘Spirits have to go somewhere’. Of course they do but where? You see, and this is a personal view, we still think in spatial terms as we do on this earth. Everything has to GO somewhere or be in it’s place. But when we talk about the Spirit world we have to step out of the box of earthy beliefs because we are talking in a new dimension where there is nether space or time. For us humans getting our heads round that one is very difficult. Some of us are so caught up in earthly beliefs that looking any further than what is apparent is difficult. I have said before, an open mind is receptive, a closed mind is not. We don’t have to believe everything and nether should we, but explore, examine and make up your own mind, given all the facts. Take care. John.
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Yes Kate it’s lovely and I’m glad it brings you comfort. But my mind works weirdly I think because it worries me to imagine him seeing me sobbing my heart out at regular intervals and not being able to help me, which he always did. Thank you Jonathan, I
love your posts, always on topic , rational and informative as well as supportive. That is how Malcolm would have replied, how we miss them.
Hi San
I also have a digital radio clock in our bedroom. Brian loved his gadgets but failed to show me how any of them worked. The alarm comes on at any time during the night yet sometimes it doesn’t bother for days/weeks and I breath a sigh of relief but it never lasts and it will beep at me once or twice a night. It has a mind of it’s own. I have tried everything to stop it apart from throwing it through the window. I manage to change the time twice a year and that’s about it but the alarm is a complete mystery. I have now had to turn the sound down so that it doesn’t wake me as I never know when it will go off but even this doesn’t last and it comes on full blast once more. I can’t find the instructions for the thing so seem to be stuck with it. I can imagine Brian having a good laugh at my expense though.
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