Losing a husband

Hello - Firstly Thank you for allowing me to join you all - On 9th June I came home to find that my husband had had a massive stroke - initially he responded to me by squeezing my hand but I had no other response from him - on 12th June he very peacefully slipped away from us - I’m getting through each day but I miss him so much - I have a grownup Daughter who is devestated that her Daddy has gone and an almost 2 year old Grandson who keeps me smiling. I’m told that it will get easier and I’m told that its early days yet but I just feel so so empty. (Thank you for letting me ramble on)

Hi Tracey. I’m very sorry to read about your husband. How very sad for you, your daughter and little grandson. It’s so sad when this happens to us and unfortunately there isn’t a handbook to help us! My husband died 8 months ago, 16 minths after being diagnosed with cancer. The hardest thing wa to watch my strong, brave husband become so frail and weak. The early days are a whizz of funeral arrangements and paperwork and then is suddenly goes quite quiet. Adjusting to life without him is the tough part! I’m 56. I have surfaced and survived! I have days which are tougher than others. Take care. Xx

Thank you Ajd - I am 53 and so was my Husband. I like that … ‘Surfaced and survived’ - at the moment I feel like I keep coming up, gasp for air and go back under - the days go by in a blur and yes some are tougher than others but I am grateful for every day that is less tough. Thank you for sharing your own loss with me xxxxxxx

My advice is to march to the beat of your Drum! Do what is right for you. Surround yourself with those people who are going to support and not drain you! I went back to work about a month after my husband died and this gave me focus. I keep busy and I find this helps me. X

Thank you - I went back to work after about a month too - it has given me some routine and I know I am surrounded by people who will support me - my husband worked for the same company and being back there does make things a little easier - I just have this emptiness to try to deal with at the moment xxxx

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Yep! I know that gnawing empty feeling! I spend evenings with my iPad, iPhone on my knee watching crap tv! Hence my speedy reply. It would be nice the grading gnawed a few Ibs away. X

That would be great wouldnt it xx

My feelings are the same
I am so lonely
My wife died on 2 nd of July 2018,She was diagnosed with bowel cancer with spread to liver ovaries and lymph nodes on 6th June and admitted to hospital on 21st June she wasn’t well enough for any treatment, she was 51 and had no prior symptoms.My family are broken.

It’s so difficult isn’t it William

Hi Tracey
It’s devastating I have 3 grownups 2 boys and a girl and a granddaughter due in 10 days my wife’s first grandchild that she won’t see.I will never get over this.
William

Hi William, my husband passed on 28th July from cancer. I watched him suffer for a year and one of my greatest regrets is that he will never see our first grandchild, a baby girl due at the end of August

Hi Toria
I’m so sorry for your loss it’s so devastating.
Our stories are so similar it’s awful to watch someone you love suffer we had only 3 weeks with my wife from diagnosis to passing I don’t know how you coped for a year.
Our wee granddaughter is due in 8 days and to think she will never see or hold her is heartbreaking.

William

Did your wife try to hold on for the baby.My husband really tried to, which broke my heart even more.

Hi
Yes she fought hard but was so ill they could offer no treatment just devastating to watch.

There is no answer to our grief but somehow it helps slightly to know there is someone out there feeling the same loneliness and loss. I have two wonderful grown children with their own homes but I miss being the centre of someone’s life and they of mine. That easy comfort sometimes in silence has gone

Hi
I have three grown ups two stilli living with me.
They are with me as much as they can but they have their own lives to live.
Night time and first thing in the morning I find the worst so lonely going to cold bed and getting up with no one to talk to.just so unfair.

William

I echo everything that has been said.
I lost my husband May LAST year but I still feel lost and lonely just feel am going through the motions.

I’m 9 months into life without my husband. We were married for 34 years. I miss him very much and life can be lonely at times. It’s tough being on your own at 56. Hope you all have a lovely weekend. Xx

Hi
I am now 1 month without my wife we were together 30 years and had our 25th wedding anniversary in April she was 51 I am 52.I am so lost and lonely. This is the longest time we have been apart in 30 years it’s just unbearable.

William

I know exactly what you are feeling William. It’s not what any of us planned is it.

Take care x

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