Hi,thanks for letting me join the group.I lost my husband 4 weeks ago,he was my best friend and love of my life for 36 years,we where married for nearly 32 of them.He had a heart attack at the end of March and spent 6 weeks in hospital before he passed,developing complications that he just couldn’t fight and sadly passed on 30th April…He worked shifts and i am finding evening and night time really hard,just waiting for him to come home when i know he never will.I have loads of friends around me but i feel i cant burden them with the way im feeling. I have cried every day for the last 10 weeks and it seems to get harder as the weeks go on.
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@Murf . lm really sorry to see you here, lm 6 months from losing my husband. But lve found this site really helps as you’re amongst friends who do know what you are going through and will go through. Despite the emotions, roll with the waves 
, rant rave scream 
if you have to, we’ve all been there, we KNOW. Let yourself go on this site, there are plenty of us who can empathise and listen.
Take care xx
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Thank u Lostwife,I just feel so lost and empty.Its good to know the site helped u,I hope it can give me support too,its ok for friends to say i can call them anytime, but i don’t want to end up being the pal everyone ignores because all i want to do is either cry or talk about him.I have good days and bad ,as i suppose everyone does,but its good to know i can have a bad day with others x
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I’m so sorry. I lost my husband unexpectedly in his sleep last August. I feel like it’s getting harder instead of easier 
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Im sorry to hear that,it must have been terrible xx That’s the way i feel too,i know its only been 4 weeks for me but i feel i have been grieving for the whole time he was in hospital as well.10 weeks seems like a lifetime xx
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@Murf welcome to this club that no one wants to be a member of. I too hate the evenings the most. Such a lonely existence. 8 weeks for me and it’s not getting any easier. Hopefully, you find some comfort from this forum.
You’re right Jan17 no one wants to be in this club,hopefully speaking to members like u will make it a bit easier, I might not feel so alone x
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I really don’t know what’s worse. Suffering with them or not being able to say what you could have and finding him gone. I’m am feeling relieved finding this support online. I to don’t want to be a burden to my friends or family crying all the time. Thanks everyone for understanding!
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I too lost my husband, the love of my life 8 weeks ago! Totally and utterly broken without him, but the only thing that brings me comfort and keeps me going is getting out into beautiful countryside and walking and biking. Along with my little dog ( we never had kids). Seeing friends too and actually letting my hair down. It’s so hard, you feel
Sick every day and the nightmares are vile ( so unexpected how he died and I witnessed his heart attack), but I am really trying to keep positive and keep going
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@Murf I’m so sorry for the sad loss of your husband. I lost my husband suddenly at Christmas. Went to work on the Saturday and Sunday my son rang me to say that dad had collapsed. Time I got home he was gone. Just 53 years old. Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. Life is indeed is unfair and so cruel. All our future plans and dreams have gone. Five months down the road is still hard as the realisation of not seeing my husband again is hitting me hard. Miss him so much and feel lonely without him. Please take care and hopefully this site will help and support you … big hugs
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Im so sorry for your loss .l lost my husband 5 weeks ago .like you i feel totally lost and totally empty without him .i dont have any family near me .i have say if i need anything just ask . I feel so alone .i pick up his ashes tomorrow and will have him home .not the way i would like but unfortunately thats how it is .
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I am sitting here reading these msgs and crying. I know it might sound stupid but its nice to know im feeling the same emotions as others.My husband was only 53,and like you all we had so many plans for our future, even our plans for this year,holiday, new kitchen,birthday and anniversary plans,now I I don’t care about any of it as i would give everything i have just to have him here x We lost our dog in January too which was hard at the time,but nothing compared to losing my best friend. Life is hard x
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Hi .firstly sorry for your loss and sending big hugs . Im picking my husbands ashes up today and feeling really anxious .my husband was 60 . I cry everyday .totally lost .feeling i cant cope .dont want to be here without him .shutting myself away from eveyone .reading these messages you realise your not alone .you are sharing your grief and feelings .we are here for each other .xx
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@Murf it’s not stupid at all. It’s good to know there are people on here who really understand what you are going through. As much as friends and family sympathise they have no idea unless they too have lost a partner/soulmate. Sending hugs
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Thank you everyone for your support, its so good to know that even though i feel alone,there are all of you here going through the same thing,massive hugs to everyone x here’s to getting through another day x
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Reading everyone’s posts and can’t believe how many of us lost someone so young. My husband was 64. And so many plan’s for retirement. I had just been retired 3 months .
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Ele1,i know ,our loved ones have all been taken too soon.Im sure we where all the same,looking forward to making plans,and now we have to plan without them.xx
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So very sorry this sadly happened. I lost my husband in similar circumstances too. He died suddenly in my arms in our house. The pain was unbearable too. I decided to give myself 12 months to try coping with the pain. Luckily being retired, I could somehow cry myself dry and avoid the world outside. Being alone was worse without a family to call on. But I know you will, in your own time, think of all the good things in your marriage. I found prayer helpful too. 
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DianeR 
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Hi,I’ve had a strange day today.I went for breakfast with a friend, she’s been asking me for a few weeks and i keep putting it off,but today i went.,and i ended up crying in the cafe.I felt guilty wen i came home,that i shouldn’t have been out trying to act normal, and had a cry again,this is so bloody hard.How is everyone else doing today x
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