Its been 10 weeks since i lost my husband Ste, I no I need time, but the feelings of sadness is never far away. Im trying to adjust and be happier for our 9 year old daughter, but sometimes I just cant. My emotions just get the better of me. Friends have said about talking to someone but i don’t no if it will help, so here goes…
@Chelle . Talking is the best way to release those thoughts that will swirl around your head, those feelings that will hit like a hammer in an ambush, and this is the best place for that.
we here are right behind you, we’ve got your back, we know what its like. keep posting , reading and you’ll find loads of us just like you.
Sending you hugs
Sorry you have had to join this club. Well done for getting this far and for trying to be strong for your daughter but it’s ok to grieve and let go at times. I’m 5 months in and this week has been really hard but mostly I tackle things head on and I try and stay positive.
When I’m ambushed I just accept it, let it happen and gather myself again till the next time
@Chelle l’m really sorry that you have had to join this site and I’m ever so sorry that your husband has died.
My husband died 7 months ago, in October, only 25 days after being diagnosed with lung cancer.
I’ve found this site really helps as you’re amongst friends who do know what you are going through and will go through.
I am heartbroken and cry every day for my Chris: rant, rave scream if you have to, we’ve all been there, we KNOW.
You can be brutally honest on this site, there are plenty of us who can empathise and listen.
Take care and know that on here you are not alone xx Rachael
Thank you, its been a whirlwind 10 weeks, actually since Christmas 2021 when he got poorly. I cant actually believe im 42 and a widow, Ste was 48 when he passed. He was diagnosed terminally ill and inoperable with bile duct cancer in may 2022, we got married march 4th 2023, we have been together 11 years and he went into hospital for a miracle op on the 16th march, which he did come out of for 3 days, before going onto a ventilator and sadly passed on the 26th march, i feel angry, sad well everything really. He did 9 months of chemo and was quite well when he had the op. I just feel robbed and broken, to watch the person you love be so ill and go through all that to just not be here anymore is soul destroying
My heart goes out to you. It’s awful being in this situation. And both of you being so young. My husband died of lung cancer. He only went into hospital with stomach acid. Scans were taken and they found a mass on his lung. 28th February died 25th April. No symptoms at all.
It does help to talk. I started going to the Sue Rydar bereavement group that had just been set up at our local doctors once a week. I found it on the internet searching for grief groups. There maybe some around your area. Your doctor maybe able to point you in the right direction too. Sending love.
@Ali29 I am almost five months and 2 weeks in losing my husband suddenly. He was 53 years old. This week has been the hardest for me so far. I think it is the realisation that he is not coming back. Miss my husband so much and feel so lonely without him. Have been robbed of our future plans and dreams. Much love xx
I mistyped as been 4 months for me and this week has been the hardest I’ve had for a while. Usually positive and strong but for some reason this week hard. TT he longer it goes on the harder it is and like you, I think it’s realizing he’s never coming home and I miss him terribly. He was only 49 and I am gutted for him that he didn’t get to live his life, he was such a happy person so full of life
Aw hazel my friend … i know its so hard. I would love to see my hubbys lovely face again but the thought i will never see that cheeky face ever again breaks my heart i only want him ! I dont want anybody else ! How do people move on ? Ive no idea yet ? I just know this is the hardest thing ever xxx
@Ali29 I know it is so unfair and cruel that our man has been robbed of their lives and us of our future plans and dreams. Sending hugs xx
I know debs just heartbreaking I had a good chat to my hubby today and wish he could of answered me. I know there are people on this site who lost their partners a few years ago and seem more positive with their new lives. I guess we are still very early and raw though can never see me moving on from this horrendous journey. Much love
They say its good to talk to them … it helps … my mum told me at beginning when she had her "helpful " head on to keep talking to him … i often do … you keep doing that if it makes you feel better … it does me ! They also say to keep a journal and write to him … your thoughts or what’s been going on that day . Keep that connection with him hazel it will make you feel stronger xxx
Dear Chelle, I am so sorry for your loss. My husband died suddenly over three months ago. I noticed that my crying and sadness now come in waves - all of a sudden and sometimes very extensive, sometimes not so bad. I think we just have to accept that this kind of sadness and despair will stay with us for a very long time. I think it will not get better but just different and in the end we will learn to live and survive with it. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
Yeh its really sad they didnt get to live more of their life isnt it ? My husband loved his life - he had 5 beautiful grandchildren and it must be hard for them in their little heads to understand where grandad went poor kids … hard enough for us to comprehend isnt it ? Life is sad xxx
I do both of these. I’ve written to him in a diary since week 1. It’s quite good to look back and see where I was to where I am now.
I also talk to him on my walks, he must be sick of me by now as he can’t get away from me lol, I don’t shut up!
Aw … that’s lovely xx
Yeh i should do that too … check what i wrote although i know for a fact i was in such an emotional state ! I dunno how i survived those first few months ! The grief was so intense - I’m suprised i didnt have a heart attack tbh … i was in a right state ive NEVER been as sad in all my life i couldnt stand the house without him in it … after having him by my side for 37 years long time xxxx
The beginning is so raw. I’ve never cried or wailed so much. I really didn’t know how I would survive but here I am
Thank you debs … I have brought 2 journals. One to write to John which I haven’t yet but will do soon and one about his life. I’m going to put all the holidays we went on and about his jobs and nick names ect so if my son has children then they can read about their grandad. Just heartbreaking
Big hugs Xx
It never goes away,time does heal as they all say but if you box it up like im doing since 2019 it pours out on occasions and has affected my worklife several times. Depression, crippling sadness and a wonder why…hope this site works for you. Ive just joined