Every thing we did we did together and now everything seems so lonely I talk to her and ask her to show me a sign riding keeping eye on me but nothing she was my world
So sorry you have the need for this forum but I hope you will find the support you need here. It is so recent for you I guess you are likely to still be in shock and the disbelief can be so strong.
I lost my husband last April and it is easier than it was. Tears are often not far away but I can get on with things and do have a life. Not the one I want of course but still starting to do various things.
I think in the early stages you just have to listen to your body and mind and do whatever feels right at the time. There is no right and wrong on this grief journey, nor is there a set path. Each of us have different ways of coping the best we can but whatever you want to ask or say is ok on here. It’s a place where people understand.
Thank you Karen, it all happened so quick from Julie getting took in hospital its so lonely and quite in the house I just want Julie to send a sign that she is watching mud me , you take care love Bernard x
I can’t say I’ve had any signs from Richard but I truly believe he can see what I do and is guiding me. As I said on another thread somewhere, people are not made up of their bodies only, or they would be less of who they were following amputations. We are the people we are because of what is inside us. Since the laws of physics state that nothing can be created or destroyed but only changed, the people we are can’t suddenly stop being. Our bodies may change into ashes but that isn’t the essence of the person. The soul must exist somewhere in a changed form possibly,
I know its only just over five weeks ago but I cant get used to the quite and empty house she was my world can I get through this without her
It is so recent and the hill must look so steep for you to climb - more like a sheer mountain.
We can all do this together as we are stronger that way.
Be proud of any little achievement as life has turned upside down. Even getting up and dressed can be a huge achievement.
Do you have any support around you? Family? Friends? Pets?
Yes I have two married daughters but I have to remember they are going through it to they have lost their mum people are telling me to get out of the house if I can but everything we ever did we did together she was half of me will she ever let me know she is keeping eye on me
Others on here have more experience of signs that their loved one is watching over them.
As far as getting out is concerned, on your own terms and when you feel ready to try. I have found I can do something different from the things we did together whereas trying to go places we went to together are so much harder.
Make it as easy as possible for yourself and think of what would hurt you least. Some people prefer a familiar place whereas I prefer different. There is no right and wrong.
I barely left the house for weeks but I am having a very busy life now and can manage a lot more.
For me it is less painful and some days I can even talk about Richard without crying.
Take it all at your own pace. xxx
thank you Karen x
I so admire you…… I’m not getting out at all! I honestly think I’m stuck. It’s been just over 6 months since my life ended, and I really struggle.
I WFH and shopping delivered blah, blah… but, I have decided to take the bull by the horns! I did for a long time consider selling my home & moving. I have decided not to do that just now; on reflection, I suppose I was trying to run away! You can’t outrun this pain.
I do so appreciate the posts from people like yourself, it’s just that little glimmer of hope, it pushes me to try…
I know I can’t continue being a “shut-in” my wonderful husband would be so sad. Thank you for the posts that do help & provide that tiny bit of hope in an otherwise hopeless situation.
Big hug xx❤️
Glad your moving on a little Dottie Im just taking to Julie all day but I never get any signs back that she can hear me I adore her she is my world
You don’t know how much that means to know I can give a glimmer of hope.
You are so right that we can’t run away from the pain.
Why not set yourself a tiny (which will still seem huge I bet) challenge. Do you live in the countryside or a built up area?
Maybe plan to go out for just ten minutes, not to anywhere in particular but out of your usual space.
Yes I will try tomorrow to walk to bottom of the field at at back of our house but I cant even remember going for a walk on my own we was joined at the hip everything as Julie and Bernard
That would be brilliant if you can do it. Yes, you may cry all the way but she’d be so proud of you for trying.
Will let you know how I get on
I live in the suburbs of Belfast, just beside Belfast Castle ( where we had our wedding reception) the little church we married in, is a 10 minute walk.
I just can’t do a walk here, everywhere I tread, my Martin and I walked. We had two little Yorkies ( Willow & Ruby) that were basically our children! We lost both within a year of each other; it completely broke our hearts. We then decided to become foster carers with The Dogstrust! In total, we fostered around 21 little souls.
All these streets are lined with memories of myself and Martin, walking those doggies. I just find it so difficult….
I’m hoping in time, I’ll be able to walk in my beautiful husbands footsteps…
Thank you for your support xx❤️
I’ll be here for you as much as I am able.
Everything crossed for you and hoping you can walk everywhere you used to walk and thank you for chatting to me it does help
thank you again x