Hi - I found my way here after two years of losing / grieving for my husband. We had been together since 1984 - married for 29 of those. He died suddenly and during lockdown (not Covid)
I had to call an ambulance for him and eventually (after a 5 hour wait) he was taken into hospital. That was the last time I saw him, spoke to him & kissed him. I’m struggling, people in general don’t get it, understand? “Move on,” they say ? “Do it for him?”
“Make him proud.” I feel broken? Alone? Not normal? Are these feelings understandable under the circumstances 
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Hi i lost my Husband 4 months ago i have been told move on its so hard when people say things like that i do not think i can ever get over lossing my husband i also feel so alone
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Hi Sue I truly understand, this moving on **** wish I knew how to do it. I’ve also been told - keep busy, some days it takes all my energy just “to be.” How are you coping 
Hi, I found my way here after nearly 3 years after my wife, Viv passed away. We had been together since 1996, married since 2002. She died during the first week of lockdown (not Covid) when the hospital sent her home saying there was nothing else they could do. I know what it is like to have people telling you to move on and get a grip. It is normal, you are feeling alone and you have already made him proud of you. It is very normal and you will feel broken, I still do after 3 years! It is understandable and under the circumstances you will go through many different emotions. Try to bear with it OK?
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I feel the same i do not know how i am every going to move on he was my soulmate and also my bestfriend sometimes i do not feel like getting out of bed in the morning i think whats the point what have i got to look forward to
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Hello
I’m so sorry for your loss and think I understand how you are feeling. It’s 27 months since I lost my husband of 48 years ( together over 52 ) . I’ve joined clubs and do volunteering, had counselling, attend my local church but still feel so lonely and lost. People do expect me to be ‘over it’ now but I am not and don’t think I ever will be.
All we can do is keep plodding on alone and try our best.
Take care
Barbara
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Hi John thank you for responding, when people say early days - I never really know what they mean either. I guess I listen too much to others. I’m 53 life wasn’t meant to be like this. Seems so unfair
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@BarbM , we are all here for you. I don’t think the majority of us will ever be over it but we try to plod on as best we can. John
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Its so true what you said its only 4 months ago but i do not think i will ever get used to my husband not being a part of life we was together for 28 years and how people think we can get on with our lifes
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I try to get out / do stuff but it sometimes comes at a cost. You see couples out & about - hand in hand, I miss that. The hand holding, the hugs, the gentle hair strokes. I miss it all. I also miss the male banter- banter with your girl “friends,” it’s not the same. And yeah things just aren’t the same.
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Sue I’m here to listen if you need to talk / vent. I know exactly how it feels
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I find it hard to go out and see couples together all my friends still have their husbands and i find it hard being around them they are always moaning about their husbands and all i want is my husband back again
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Isn’t it funny how we always moan about our spouses until they’re gone? I think it’s a very British thing but it’s what binds us together in a way.
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Nobody has yet said “move on” to me, it’s just as well because I’d give them quite an earful !
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I’ve been told to “move on,” & how he wouldn’t want me to be sad like this?
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I had a friend the other day trying to get me together with someone i said no thank you Alan was my husband and he always will be
How can you not be sad when you have lost your soulmate life is not the same with out them
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I’ve never been directly told to move on but it has been implied many times. I just ignore it because they don’t understand what I am actually going through. I try to move on because that’s what people expect from you but it doesn’t necessarily mean that you can do it.
Of course what you are feeling is normal. They are your feelings and nobody elses. Nobody can tell you how to feel. . They can advise you, but inly you know what you need to do. Ive just benn staying with andys sister i spIn which was lovely. Andy never got to go there but would have loved it. We talked about him good and bad and i thanked her friends for looking after her as she lives on her own. You carry on doing what youre doing. None of this is easy. Of course you are broken but not you personally
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