Hi albayzin, I’m so pleased you have posted one here. I still can’t believe it’s real at the moment just want my Jonathan to walk through the door. Have you got a good family and friends supporting you? Never really thought about grief before we always said we would only part through death. Please message me anytime to chat. Mark
Hello Mark,
My name is Paul, my husband was Steve. It’s raw isn’t it but thank you for taking the time to reply because we all feel so lonely right now. Unfortunately, due to various circumstances, I find myself quite alone and far from friends so it’s great to hear from you.
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I hope you have support from family and friends where you are. It would be good to share experiences and memories. Paul.
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Im Mark and my husband was Jonathan I would definitely be up for chatting it’s so helpful to find others dealing with such pain I never thought existed. Heading towards 3 months now and I’m still in disbelief. Mark
Morning Mark, I think I am an hour ahead of you so missed your message last night. I’m so sorry you lost Jonathan so suddenly. That must be a terrible shock to deal with. I suppose for me it wasn’t unexpected as Steve had fought a courageous battle against the cancer for two years. As his carer, I had a purpose while he was ill and it was losing that purpose as well as him which I have found hard. One isn’t quite sure what to do with yourself.
I’m glad I thought about this charity website. Chatting together will certainly help us both I think. Hope you have a good day today.
Paul
Morning Paul, I’m so pleased we can talk to each other about the passing of our true loves. Mark
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Hi Mark, how’s your day been. It’s been quiet here with rain at last….we desperately need it. Have been thinking about you quite a lot today as it’s that 3 month thing…… it was 3 months for me last week and it was hard but my mood has changed and I now am beginning to remember the good times and not be so angry. I suppose that is the best we can do…… our memories will be with us always and they are private and precious and we will keep them in our hearts. I came across a lovely saying the other day which said; “ you still live in the silence between my thoughts”.
Take care, Paul
Hi Paul, it’s been a hard today just keep crying and so alone. Need to find things to do in the evenings I find the hardest time off the day. Where are you based? Mark
I live in Spain. I’m sort of getting used to being alone or at least accepting it. Have you got support where you are?
Keep talking if is helps you through the evenings.
I do have a good family and friends supporting me. It’s just so different isn’t it without our husbands being beside us to talk.
My family and friends are supportive but all live in other countries so my support is all “on line” if that makes sense. It is a huge gap when someone is not at your side. I’m forever thinking to myself… oh, I must tell Steve that …or …… he’ll like that. Are you in the UK? If you are retired like me, then the days do seem very long sometimes.
Hi Paul, yes I’m in the UK. I still talk to Jonathan a lot and I’m 3 or 4 minutes walk from his grave which I go al least twice a day. I’ve gone back to work part time. I’m 49 and Jonathan was 64.
Evening Mark,
I know what you mean about talking…… I often do too. I’m 73 ( ancient!) and Steve was only 62 and had 41 years together of which 8 years when we were both “retired” so luckier than many.
It’s good that you have part time work…. I wish I had something to do. People suggest charity work and all that…… but really? Take care of yourself and make the most of your friends and family who want to support you. Paul
Hi albayzin, long time since we chatted how are you feeling my friend? Hope you’re looking after yourself. M
Hi Mark,
Good to hear from you. How are you doing. I’m ok but very lonely as you might expect. Go for days without speaking to anyone. I’m naturally shy so finding it hard… but getting by.
Are you ok?
Paul
Hi Paul, it’s been a tough week again but we must try hard to carry on. Im sad to hear you’re lonely and don’t speak to anyone. We should maybe exchange numbers I like to talk . Mark
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Hello everyone,
I just wanted to post a gentle reminder about sharing personal details on the community.
Our terms and conditions ask you not to publish your contact details or identifying information on our site to protect your own privacy and security.
Please remember that this is a public community, so remaining anonymous is the best way to stay safe.
If you’d like to contact another member more privately, you can send them a private message through the site. For more information on how to use private messages, please see our help section.
Take care,
Seaneen
I have tried to follow their instructions to send you a private message but can’t even find the first step where is says click on profile pic top right! Had tried to send you my number but the message was deleted. I’ll have another look later…I must be missing something.
Hello @albayzin, if you visit Mark’s profile by clicking this link:
then click, “Private message”, you can send a private message to Mark.
I hope this is helpful
Seaneen
Thank you very much for your help