So true but as I say I don’t expect you to understand I’d just like you to listen and not judge me on how my grief has affected me not to much to ask 
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Hi maddie so glad you got to lake garda dawn is with you .try to enjoy have a lovely trip xx
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Well it’s Christmas Eve so just tomorrow to get out of the way it’s going to be tougher than previous ones we learnt to live our pain but now hubby died 12 weeks ago just more grief he’s the one that would get me up Christmas morning help me turn my tears to laughter it’s 18 years since our child died never put tree or trimmings up guess if had small one to consider then yes of course we would have done so now it’s going to be just the two of us so sad hubby was one whom made me laugh I am forgetting how to laugh sad sad but my heart is going to each and every mother out there bearing this unimaginable pain I thought it would kill me for years it was so intense I’d cry in shops streets well anywhere I just completely lost control it felt up so unnatural I nearly went completely in sane luckily I had fantastic doctor whom supported me every step of the way big hugs love and courage to all of you from the depth of my heart I feel for each and every one of you
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Sending love a hugs to you too.
Kate xxx
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Hello dally if 5his helps you get through you4 unimaginable pain then it’s fine why shouldn’t it be you say how much he loved Christmas then I’d say it’s perfect as long as it’s helpful to you
There’s no right or wrong way to grief
I hope you gain strength of doing what you know your boy would want
Sending you god’s blessings and a big hug from me to you mother to mother with broken hearts
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Thinking of you all and our precious children this Christmas. Thank you so much for all the love and support 
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Beautiful Victoria, their light shines bright x
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Victoria that’s simply beautiful please everyone suffering our pain try to be kind to yourself
Iv not been able to even bring my beautiful grib out that our other son got me as a Christmas gift 3 years ago iv not had trimming up in 18 years of course had I got small children or grandchildren then I’d have done it for them then 3 years ago our other son 37 then said it’s not trimming up it’s what Christmas is the birth of Jesus and to give us hope so yes iv always got it out but with my hubby soulmate rock the man that took care of us made me laugh died 12 weeks ago so just more grief pain and heartache just another empty chair so today Christmas Day it’s so sad me and my son will go to church then back to ours he’s mad homemade cottage pie desert we’ve decided no exchange of gifts somehow we must get through the day who knows how wel be as I am sure you all know on3 minute your reasonable ok then bang a word song sound colour word anything can just turn you in to inconsolable crying like it’s all just happened or on the other hand you may just feel numb
But however you are remember it’s always ok not to be ok and don’t allow anyone to tell you how to be l hope you all find peace along our long bumpy road sometimes that roads so long you stop say no more take a break relax and say iv got this and il do it oh gosh I sound like a lecture so sorry to go on peace be with you all today
Very sad very hard. peace to all thank for being so kind .this life seems so sad right now .love to everyone love and best wishes zoe xx
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ThNk you zoe peace to you and All us suffering mums out there iv came 18 years thinking the pain would physically kill me I had and still do have amazing support from GP and mental health service so I am proof youl all come through I know my pains different to 18 years ago but I’d say that only began around 5 years ago my hubby was simply amazing at lifting my spirits and listening he became my protector with my grief and now I am grieving him as well nothing seems to make sense but iv got our other son to keep going for I know he’s 40 but he’s also struggling after his brother tragically died and now it’s just the two of us peace be with all of you mums and if today you laugh enjoy don’t feel bad I know the first time I started to laugh I also felt riddled with guilt but I soon worked through it’s always best to be bright and chearful but only if you can I will hold all mothers around the world bearing our pain close to my heart
Take care Anne .youve now lost your husband. I cant imagine how hard it is .you cant sleep like me .thinkin of you hope today goes as well as it can.i just want to hug sam .know his safe .first xmas without him i feel im in a nightmare nothing feels right xx
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Bless you zoe9 it’s no time at all nothing will feel right I hope your not alone do you have a husband or partner at home with you
I’d often feel like that it was almost like I’d see shops with there names but I’d just stand and stare thinking what’s that what’s the meaning
Yet I could clearly say sorrow a mother feels when loosing her child is the prise we pay to have had them in our life’s
Life is the only one thing we can never replace when we loose it
Grief is love with nowhere to go you can’t choose to put it in the drawer for a while it may stay or it may jump straight back at you I got enjoyment from nothing for years I worried for our other son for what he’d witnessed and then watching his mum deteriorate even developed an eating disorder which I was told control as I couldn’t control the tragedy PTSD al sorts to be honest giving me that time back I’d have excepted help much sooner than I did it was destroying my hubby and son I don’t know if you have any religious beliefs I do and somehow that’s helped me I was always in emergency room complaining of heart stomach well just about everything al sorts of tests told psychosomatic-pain it’s when you really have the symptoms but not the condition comes from GAD health anxiety please try not allow this happen to you your not going to be thinking rationally or feeling as you’d like it’s absolutely normal I just want to reach out to you with hugs I know later this morning my son will turn up and within seconds big hugs and lots of tears maybe more this year as hubby isn’t hear somehow he made days like Christmas special yet not making too much of a fuss I do worry when you say things don’t feel right of course they won’t but id like to think you have a good GP to talk to if it wasn’t for my dr community mental health service I possibly wouldn’t be here so understandable our son is worried thinking is this all going to repeat I had a spell where I through all food away starting ti get it back on track a little for the sake of my son so please please don’t let things fester talk to your dr I will say a prayer for you in church wheather you believe or not id like to light a candle and ask god to comfort you please say back what ever you feel I am a RC and believe me I said plenty even to the priest but people understand and if they don’t that’s there problem I am here for you love peace and hugs
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Thanking you all for the love and support you have given me these last four years I honestly don’t know where I would have been without this forum and all you lovely people, It’s my comfort blanket…
I wish you all a peaceful Christmas and that the coming year brings some comfort that we all deserve. Marina xxx
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Sending love and hugs to all 
praying for you all to have strength to carry you through this difficult time and thanking you all for your love and support 
Michelle xxxx
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Marina I pray you somehow find a little peace no-matter how many times we say we say it’s just another day but actually it’s not part of us are missing I have great faith and even that doesn’t always help but somehow in between the crying feeling numb I get comfort I never did until I watch my hubby go 5 months through a struggle with his illness he had faith but didn’t practice in the way I do yet I helped him get closer to god and he honestly had no fear he totally excepted what was about to happen he say I am going to a better place he was so worried how I’d cope without him times like today without our beautiful son .your a mum your heart will be bleeding inside unimaginable pain nobody can help with I pray for you and all you mums out there I ask my self how did I get from 18 years ago to today honestly iv no idea I guess gods been carrying me love and huge hugs to all of you
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Dear All
Sending love and hugs. I pray that we can all get through the day. I have already had two wobbles but I am trying for my family’s sake. I’m just off to my brothers for dinner but I’d rather just get back into bed and pull the duvet over my head 
I know that all of you on here will understand this.
Deborah xxx
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Hi all sending hugs and love to you all today . I’m going to walk by the sea . Scattered mums ashes to sea yesterday said goodbye to her and my son lots of tears . It’s a hard time but together we will all get through it x
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Thank you anne for your kindness i would love you to light a candle thinking of you today much love zoe xx
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Thank you everyone .this site has been my life line wish you all love and peace and a big thank you much love. This day just so hard xxx
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Dear all
I’m sending love and thanks to you all for your support.
What an amazing group of people you are
I’ve read that grief is love that has nowhere to go…I feel Henry near me (although I had a meltdown last night) and I’m sending my love to him today as always.
Trying to be grateful for the 30 years of having him on earth and knowing I will be with him again when it’s my time to fly.
I hope you find some peace today.
Purple xx
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