Sending love and hugs. Losing your husband such a short time ago is awful for you. My sister lost her husband in August. She us so shattered by it.
Take care of yourself.
Lots of love Kate xx
Bless your sister yes itās knocked me completely of my feet he was an amazing man nothing he wouldnāt do for me he fully appreciated how much the affect of loosing our child had on me as a person
Nobody would do for me what he has over past 18 years so iv lost my child my hubby my soulmate my rock my world all alone he was loved by my whole family but I am getting a little piā¦ā¦ of with one niece comparing her grief to mine and tells me how lucky i am he stayed and stuck by me due to the poor mental health I endured after the shock of such a tragedy
She clearly donāt understand true unconditional love
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So sad today canāt stop the tears. Feel like waiting but nothing happening .dont want to go in to 2022 i feel i will be leaving sam behind .this sadness hurts so bad. This longing .why oh why has this happened zoe x
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Oh Zoe I feel so sad for you. The worst time for me after losing my beautiful girl was New Years Eve. I have to confess I went slightly mad but cope now by trying to avoid the hype, keep myself busy and going to bed early. That has worked for me the last two years. Just whatever gets you through then the next day is just another day ā¦ youāll get there, we are all here with you xxx
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Yes as mother awful time to get through, letās hope 2022 will be kind to us . Have just found out Jessica our grandajugter has Covid and she fainted knocked her head and was sick . The ambulance came wanted to take her to the hospital. But Sarah asked if she could avoid taken her there . So she has to keep an eye on her . So I had another meltdown this afternoon . I donāt think I can cope with much more . After all what we have through with this bloody holiday . So wish Dawn seas here she was my rock . I miss her so so much . With love Maddie xxx
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Oh Maddie, how frightening for you. Its so hard when there is so much infection going on.
Brooke and Jamie are full f the cold but not Covid but numbers going up all around.
Try not to worry too much, Sarah will be watching her.
Love to you.
Kate xx
Thankyou Kate Sarah didnāt want jess to go to hospital , so she has to keep an eye on her , she has a massive bruise on the side of her face , but she bang her head so much . All I want to do is give her a big hug . But I know thatās not possible as I am not aloud to visit . Maddie xx
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Dear Maddie, Kate is right ā¦ Sarah will watch over Jessie so try not to worry. Maybe send Jessie a nice card or message then she will know you are thinking of her and sending her your love.
Hugs will come later. Sending you lots of love to you xxx
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Thankyou Victoria, I keep sending her text messages , to tell her we are thinking of her . And John keeps telling me I donāt need to send anymore , she has got the message. Love sis Maddie xx
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Thank you victoria .i know i can say what i feel im just broken thank you for your kind words x
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I wish we could all get together, give each other a hug and share a few bottles of wine. We are together in this club that we never wanted to join but we have each otherās backs 
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Yes its crazy ive talked more on this site .i deel i can say how im really feeling . People dont get it im so lost without my boy it dont seem real .its a very strange feeling . Thank you for replying victoria im so grateful xxx
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Zoe9 , a very strange feeling it certainly is, I feel like I have stepped out of my world into some sort of other reality and I just want to get back into my real world. I also know what you mean about not wanting 2022 to come as it feels like we are leaving them behind. It seems mad as itās just another day but they were here with us in 2021 , 2022 is somewhere else and it feels like We are leaving them behind. That makes me feel guilty but really they had to leave us we didnāt leave them and non of us could do anything about it, just hope they are happy . I think to myself it does not matter how unhappy I am as long as he is happy now thatās all that matters. Other family members seem to be getting over it much better than me, I donāt seem to be moving on at all and trying to pretend , especially at this time ,is so exhausting . I just donāt want to even get up out of bed let alone do all the Christmas stuff . I am rambling now but we can do that on here canāt we.
Love jss xx
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Oh jss your not rambling i feel exactly the same want my old life back.i feel the same i feel really alone in this madness .my poor daughter is sobbing everynight she has to be mummy in the day its just so not right i keep thinking be alright tomorrow like your in a dream big hugs jess xx
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I read this and thought of us all.
āIt has been said, time heals all wounds. I do not agree.
The wounds remain. In time, the mind (protecting its sanity), covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never goneā.
Sending love, hope and peace to you all.
Kate xxx
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Hello again All,
Kate those words ring very true. I like everyone on here is glad Christmas is out the way. Sometimes the pain even after 5 years can be raw and you cry like there is no tomorrow but then I think bring on 2022,another year nearer for me to seeing my Sam. On birthday cards, or Christmas cards, Sam would always write, " Mum thanks for everything you do love Sam". Yet the last birthday card said All my love always Sam, when I feel low I take that card out and read those words again and again.
Love Helen
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Hi all cant pick my self up laying in bed first new year without my boy sam .its too wrong it hurts so bad i feel awful sorry love zoe
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Itās so hard. I used to love hogmanay in our Village. Now I go to bed about 10 to make sure I am asleep for the bells.
Just stay where you are until you are ready to get up. There are no rules. We just get by doing whatever fits at the time.
Sending love.
Kate xxx
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Me to kate .this year just dont seem right without sam . Thank you for your kind words thinking of you all on here much love zoe xx
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Zoe, itās very very tough and painful. We could never imagine how devastating losing our children could be. We understand how birthdays and anniversaries will be, but nothing or no-one could prepare you for the feelings we have to endure on days like these. As Kate says, there are no rules. Itās impossible to get your head around. Only those whoāve suffered as we have can begin understand. Tonight is the 7th NYE me and I still had tears this morning and will have tears tonight. Itās not fair. Iāll be glad when these holidays are over.
Sending love and hugs to everyone.
Chris xx
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