Dear Michelle, Matt was a wonderful young man a credit to you and your family. .
For you and your husband to have to sit through such an inquest must have taken so much courage from you both, its shows how strong a true parents love is…
With love Marina xxx
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Michelle, a well deserved, lasting tribute which will reach so many. He is in so many hearts and minds already and now he can inspire many more showing his pride and commitment. I hope it brings you some much needed peace.
Love Chris x
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Hi Zoe - I’m feeling a bit better today. Last few days all the stress etc got the better of me and I was slumping. Got up and out this morning and found the energy to browse the shops instead of dashing in and out, in a rush to get back home and hide. It almost feels like tempting fate to say the chinks of light are still happening. Hope you are ok as you can be. Hugs and love xxx
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To all my lovely friends,
Thank you all for your kind comments, it’s so nice that we have been able to do this, yes Chris it has given us some peace:heart:
. It has gone in the local papers today with all the children sat on the bench bless them, it says how his memory will live on. 
Once again thank everyone,
much love to all Michelle xxx
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That is so good Mitchell’s , all we need is our children remembered . Let’s face it we are so proud of them , they didn’t deserve to leave us so soon . Sending hugs Maddie xxx
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That’s beautiful Michelle,
Such a lovely tribute to your son and his memory will most definitely live on.
I read all the reports etc and was amazed at what your don had achieved…you must be so very proud if him.
Such a lovely young man.
Love and hugs…Sue xxxx
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I found this today and thought I would share it with you all as I find it difficult to talk about Gemma. So many taboos xx.
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Victoria, I love this only wish I could say it out loud each and every day x
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Me too I want to yell it from the roof tops.
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Oh victoria thats so true hope your doing ok much love zoe
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Dear Victoria,
Thank you for sharing this 
so true, its like we need to keep talking about them as I’m sure as time passes people just simply think we have moved on, time stood still for us the day our precious children were taken. It’s like having the bench placed at Matt’s school was lovely and everyone has been talking about it but I think that some people may think that’s it as in I will just get on with normal life now, how little do they know, I will never stop talking about my precious boy and I couldn’t care less about what people think or say, thank God we can come on here and express ourselves and not be judged, although sometimes I feel so sad when I read some posts it breaks your heart that we are suffering, all at different stages buy on the same journey, sending you much love Victoria and we will definitely meet up again soon, take care everyone love to you all.
Michelle xxx
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Hi Victoria,
The words are very true, people who have not suffered the devastating loss that we have think we should be able to move on and most of us look OK on the outside, it’s your heart that is torn in two.
love Helen
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I know what you mean. My sister, who loves me, has noticed that I’m having some better days and I’m able to talk about other things, instead of the one topic of my daughter. She means well but she thinks a couple of good days means I’m all fixed and moved on. I don’t think she can understand that losing my girl is not the same as when we lost our parents. We used to be very close but since my daughter died she’s said some horrid things to me, which has never happened before. It took my best friend phoning her and saying how upset I really was, for her to come down and help me. I think things will never be the same again between us. I know she loves me but I feel she wants to brush all that’s happened under the carpet. She sent me a text in the early weeks when I was on the floor, telling me I was being manipulative. It felt like what she said was what everyone thought and nearly finished me off. She also said she was really angry that I phoned her when she was out shopping. These things are out of character for her and I’m trying to think she was upset and looking for someone to blame and sent that text when she wasn’t thinking straight. Otherwise I have to think she’s turned into someone I don’t even like. We have been rock solid all my life until my daughter died. We’re still in contact but I know now not to expect support from her. Xx
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Dear Nell, that’s horrible for you. Sounds like your sister is grappling with her own emotions and doesn’t know how she should be with you. Grief for us is greater and deeper than any of us could have imagined. As you say, losing parents is a whole different thing. It’s the correct order.
It lies behind our eyes as we watch the outside world carry on like the loss of our precious daughters and sons was a five minute wonder. Nobody knows how bad it feels.
My friend who helps me with the holiday cottages says there is now a deep sadness in my eyes that was never there before.
I hope your sister can rebuild your relationship. It’s not down to you, you have done nothing wrong.
Take care dear friends.
Much love, Kate x
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Thank you. I’m keeping a relationship with her, hoping that later on there will come a time when we can talk about it all and listen to each other. Apart from my grandkids she’s my only living relative. She is a good kind person and I don’t think she can believe how utterly devastating it is. Sending you kind thoughts that you have an ok day xxx
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Dear Nell, I feel for you so much … we should not have to navigate other people’s feelings so much when our hearts have been so broken. I have posted on here before about how my sister has not spoken to me since Gemma’s service. She actually told me on the day that she never wanted to see me again as she disagreed with how we arranged it. But I had Gemma’s boys to consider and they were my priority. I went along with what Coren, who was 20 at the time, could cope with. I have no regrets though because we did exactly what Coren wanted for his mummy and it meant that Charlie (who was 7), could also be at the service celebrating his mummy’s life.
My niece is getting married in September and we haven’t been invited of course. It is sad and hurtful but I have other people in my life, family and friends who are kind and loving.
I hope your relationship with your sister can be rekindled. Much love xxx
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Sorry to hear that Nell. I had probably four good days in a row and I was elated, but yesterday just out of the blue I felt down in the dumps again. I went to work and our newest employee came over to me and said are you okay and I said why do you ask? She said I am
a empath and I sometimes can feel what other people are feeling. I told her no I wasn’t feeling too good today and she came and gave me a big hug and we talked a bit about Theo and grief. It’s so funny I’ve been working with my other coworkers for 10 years and more and no one there showed me the compassion that a person I don’t know as well as my other coworkers showed me so much compassion. Just because I had four good days in a row does not mean that I am done with grieving it means I’m moving forward but it’s a back and forth process. I wasn’t expecting to feel like that that day but it just hit me out of nowhere, and I expect it to be that way for a while.
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Hello Racy, I’ve not got good Internet where I am so not likely to be posting much, but I just wanted to say, that person was sent to be a comfort to you.
Hang in there - I know you will- love Ann xx
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An Angel with hidden wings Racy. She was there because you were in need of that hug.
Take care hope you have some more good days.
Much love, Kate xx
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