Such beautiful pics.
I am 11 yrs on and i feel the same as u. I don’t think it ever changes. The depth of our sorrow is a measure of our love for the child we have lost. I have managed to look at it this way. It took practice. So those days when i can’t get out of bed or all i can do is cry, i know it is because i still love my son. It is a present love not in the past. It is a way of keeping him present in my life. I know someone on here mentioned a book called continuing bonds. I can’t afford to buy it but i do all i can to keep him in my life, i talk to his pictures etc
I hope u can try something that will help u cope.
Love and hugs
Pauline
Yes zpsjline I have bought so many books over the years . It’s lovely finding how everyone have found they way to move forward . I would buy anything and do anything to bring myself closer to Dawn . When we have seen Jackoev, who is amazing . We ask Dawn is there anything we can do to get closer to you . And she said no . So we do now accept that . When we see Jackie and ask Dawn all thoesv questions She tells us the truth . She sits x as long side of us . And we can feel her with us . It’s the best ever . We know she is is happy and that’s all we can ask for . And I know she will be there for us . She told us to get s life . . With love Maddie xx
Dear Maddie,
Lovely photo’s Dawn looks so happy,
Sending you love and hugs to get you through another difficult day my friend, wishing Dawn a Happy Heavenly Birthday for tomorrow, she will by your side and tucked safely in your heart pocket, take care Michelle xxxx
Hi Zoe how are you doing? Over2 years now for both of us and my husband has said we should start getting rid of my sons clothes and shoes, I just had a panic and said no way. I just couldn’t face it . I was thinking have you been able to let go of any of your dear boys, Sam, things yet ? I was wondering how long before others felt they could start letting go of their child’s belongings and how they managed to face it ? Am I just being self indulgent or melodramatic , I just feel I would be loosing more of him if I get rid of his stuff . I just can’t let them go , too many memories attached to them. At the moment I feel I could never let go of any of his things, ever.
Love to all Jess xx
Hi Jss , have just read your message , I am afraid I can’t get of anything of Dawns , she didn’t live with us . But I just can’t get rid of the things she gave me from years back when she started to feel ill , she gave me the most amazing strapless dress which I did wear on a Bond night . I do would love to wear it again with all her amazing jewerery she gave me , as I think she knew she would never wear again . But I still have her jeans , business suits . I just cannot get rid of . Why would I , that’s all I have left of her . But you must do what you find is the right thing with you . I must say when her husband asked us was there anything we wanted , I wasn’t with it . But she had the most amazing Disney ornaments , and when I finally came to my senses I asked for them . And he had sold them , My heart was broken , as we both loved Disney so much . Sending love Maddie . Xx
Hi Maddie I know some people get rid of items straight away, my mother got rid of lots of my fathers stuff very quickly which I could never understand, but she was from a different generation and maybe they just think the past is the past , but that’s something I could not do and I still have some of my dads things. Some people are more sentimental than others I suppose. It’s a pity your son in law could not keep hold of your daughters stuff for a bit longer, he might even regret it now himself, maybe he was not thinking straight either then. I am glad you still have some precious things of Dawns tho to help with memories.
Love Jess xx
Hi jess i feel the same as you . My sams room is how he left it .trainers all round the edge of walls his xbox . His clothes . No i would not part with them even his bit draw . I put his trainers on and sit in his coat i spray his after shave . You do what makes you feel comfortable . We only have. Memorys and possessions . Its wicked and sad xx
Yes Zoe me to, and the tears still come.
Thank goodness we have this site , It’s only here we can come and admit how we really feel because in the outside world people think we should be over it by now, so we just pretend. How can we get over it, we can’t go back to who we were and how it used to be can we? I certainly am not the person I was before, such a hard lesson to have to learn, and what’s the point of it all ? It seems we learn things too late. It is all still “if only,” for me, what ifs and why even after two years. It’s just waiting and hoping isn’t it Xxxx
I still have a trunk full of Gemma’s belongings and have saved them for the boys. For myself I kept a few precious pieces. I have them scattered around our house now.
Emptying Gemma!’s house was about the hardest thing I ever had to do. Eventually I could not do it any more so Bill and Coren’s daddy finished it.
Maddie, I’m so sorry you didn’t get Dawn’s Disney collection as I know how much it meant.
Jess and Zoe, it is lovely this you can keep your children’s spaces and I’m sure that helps you. Much love to everyone
Hi Maddie and all on here,
What a lovely picture of Dawn, her smile reaches right up to her eyes. I do read all of the posts but dont go on here now as much. I am seeing a spiritualist/medium in October, she has such a waiting list so I am hoping I hear from Sam.
With love to you all
Helen
I
Dear Helen,
So lovely to hear from you. I do think of you and all our friends here.
I saw a psychic healer and she was amazing so I do hope you have a good experience .
Much love, Daryl x
Dear all friends. Well 25th was the anniversary and i have say i coped really well. I decided to drive up to Inverness as i needed some stuff from Clinique. Anyway, i was almost going to burst into tears waiting at some traffic lights when ‘thump’ the car behind ran into mine. No damage to mine, thankfully, but it did jolt me back to concentrating on my driving and the tearful moment didn’t come.
I wasn’t expecting to cope so well as i had a load of messages from friends thinking of us. That evening a close friend came round with a beautiful buquet of roses. So kind of her.
Happy 25 th wedding anniversary to you and John . Oh what a lovely present . Hope you were not hurt . . Nice to know you have such good friends . Lots of love Maddie xx
Well done Kate. These anniversaries are so hard and I think we struggle with them. I love the idea of treating yourself a little as I am sure that is what Lisa would want for you. Much love to you all
Hi everyone, it’s so reassuring to know that our friends on here are and always will be here for each other no matter how much time passes by. Time is irrelevant in our devastating loss and we will continue to need this support from pretty much the only people who truly know how we struggle long term. The birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Easter, Mothers/Fathers Day and all the times when our loss stops us in our tracks. Absolutely anytime when we feel overwhelmed by others, events, situations, life, we can always turn to those who understand how these things continue to affect us and always will, just as others in recent days have done.
Dawn looks so happy,
.