i no the youngest one not rember her as he get older i keep her memory alive by talking about her it also so hard her husband has now meet somone i was so angry with him as i felt he betrayed her as he said he never forget it just company as he lonley i have to separate this and concentrate on children as it was killing me has anyone else on here went trough same thing when someone moves on i just trying to b kind and Savile for the children sake as i dont want them to feel any tension i no he young and it would happen some day just feel year later was very quick trying to understand they were together 20 years
Hi Shaz I understand how you feel. My daughterās husband met someone else afterwards but slightly different situation as they had already separated before we lost Gemma (not her husbands fault and no one else involved).
I understood that he would meet someone else. He was still a young man and I would hate for him to be lonely ā¦ he is such a lovely man and like another son for me.
xxx
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Well Jamie, Lisas partner hasnāt moved on at all and its 5 years. Lisas ashes still sitting in his kitchen and photos of Lisa everywhere, even on his keyring
He did meet someone a couple of Christmasās ago but it only lasted 2 or 3 weeks. He just couldnāt take the relationship further. Poor darling. He puts Brooke before anything or anyone you see.
Lots of Love, Kate xx
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Hello Kate i think that your friend or brokkes partner, maybe atuck in a rut and afraid that if he moves on, he may feel guilty and think he is deserting her.
If he hasnāt had and counselling or a talking therapy, perhaps he should ask his doctor to refer him.
Theres nowt wrong with not moving on, but from experience i/we know that his partner wouldnāt want him to stay in a rut.
But find a new life
Thats all i will say for now, as my own health is affectiong me physically and emotionally and causing me to lose weight etc
mr chipps 1
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Its not my friend or partner o was meaning Lisas widower for a better description. He is still in love with our Lisa and nobody can take away the love they had for each other. I reckon he will meey someone eventually but he isnt ready yet whilst Brooke is still young.
Kate x
Hi Kate . Im sorry i got it wrong. He may never meet anyone if i am anything to go by?
I had relationships, but i never met the right person.
I havent had a relationship for the last 14 years the lastcwoman was a liar and was sewing another bloke and wanted to carry on seeing us both,
She simply wanted me to fit in with her lady friends, who she went away with for several weeks a year at a time. In their motor homes
i have to to accept, that like my late wife in heaven once told me. That i would die a lonely old man.
My wife died 30 years ago, so perhaps she was right. And you maybe right about himmiving on when his child gets older.
Basically i have come to think that its time i left the site, or stopped replying to people, because i maybe doing more harm than good x
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You are doing ok. I only really get on the site when i see friends who helped me 5 years ago and when i see souls like myself, in the early days not able to see the way forwards.
Its a sad place we find oursrlves, isnt it.
We love our son in law dearly but i admit i struggled with my emotions when he said that he had met someone. I wished him well but i could see in his body language with this lovely girl, that he wasnāt ready. Poor lass, she is a sweet and lovely person but i am glaf he didnt let her go on thinking he was in love.
He is a good man in every way. We are very lucky to have him.
Take care.
Katex
Hi kate thanks forcyour kind words.
I met a woman 6 months after my wifes death, it wasnt to be , but it lasted 3 years. But she didnt really trust me, as she had been cheated on twice, as had virtually all the women i had relationships with, this made me wonder, i met a widow on the rebound, but it hasnt worked, were just friends, but shes movie closer to her family, so holidays and days off are become a thing of the past.
To be honest with my long term and unstable health issues, it would take someone special to standby me. Keith x
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Mynixie, I saw that you are from Bristol , I go to that TCF group, they are a very caring group of people, all very understanding. Perhaps ill see you there.
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Thanks Taff. Iām only 6 weeks in so canāt join any groups yet though I must admit Iām really struggling on my own.
Today has been awful - Iām hoping itās the lead up to the funeral on Wednesday thatās making it particularly difficult for me at the moment as Iām not coping well at all.
Just to make things worse (if possible) weāre in the middle of moving house at the moment which is the last thing I want to do but weāre too far in to pull out now.
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These are very early days for you, Mynxie, you must still be in shock, and you have the funeral to get through on Wednesday. I am so sorry you are going through this - plus a house move.
Like Taff, I have found my local TCF to be very helpful, supportive and comforting. I have made some friends there. But I do understand that you donāt feel ready to go there yet. Give it time.
I wish you well for the week ahead. I know the funeral will be painful, but itās also a chance to be with people who knew and loved your son.
Keep in touch with this online group. We are here to support each other.
Take care - Susan J. 
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I am sad to hear of your recent bereavement, things can be very mixed up, simply do what you feel.is,coming naturally and possibly listen and read advice, but only do what feels right for you
May your loved one be taken to heaven by guardian angels frim above
And guided gentlyand safely with their unending compassion sweet
music and caring love mr chipps 1 x
Vivid dreams.
Hi all at the risk of changing the subject. Since my son died never a day goes by I donāt think of him. Iāve dreamt of him many times but usually forgotten about by morning. However over the course of time Iāve had what I can only describe as real experiences, all be it in a dream form ,where I can remember every single detail. Hugging him, his smell, everything we talked about in fine detail , every detail of his features. Almost as if he was still here. So much so that when I wake I have to convince myself that he is not.
Last night I went to bed. I hadnāt been drinking, I donāt take any meds. We hadnāt been discussing him beforehand. The dream started.
6 in the morning I was sat downstairs. There was a knock at the door. Opened it. And there he was. I could tell you exactly what he was wearing. His hair, his all over appearance. He walked in the house and for a few moments I was speechless and confused. Eventually I said. But you are dead. He went into a greatly detailed explanation as to why he disappeared. He went on to tell me where he had been living. What he had been doing. The jobs heās been doing over the last few years. It was as real as can be. I started to warm to him and convince myself it was real. We talked for ages , he told me alsorts. Justifying why he hadnāt been in touch. I was physically upset. But then I started to come to my senses ( still dreaming). I said. But we were in the hospital watching you on life support. I witnessed you take your final breaths. And he answered. But did you really!!! He described how it was all in my imagination, I believed himā¦ but I had all the niggling questions. The car crash. The hospital. The funeral. I began to get stressed at him asking Have you any idea what I have been going through these last few years. How his death completely broke me. How I have had to learn to live without him. At that point I woke up crying for for a good few minutes I had to convince myself it was just a dream. But even after being awake for a good few hours I can recall absolutely every detail. Even doubting myself as to what is real and what isnāt. Obviously it was a dream. I no non believers will tell me, itās your mind playing tricks. All I know in the time he has passed Iāve probably had 5 or 6 such encounters. I remember all of them. I really donāt know wether it means anything. Is it a subliminal message from him or just wishful thinking on my part. My question is , does anyone else have similar experiences. Iām long since past the early stages of grief. I certainly canāt dream to order. As in. Rite ok tonight Iāll think of him in my sleep. It just happens. Maybe once a year or once every couple of years. But why such detail. Why do I remember absolutely everything once Iāve woken up.
Ok thanks for listening
Take care
Jim
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Hi Jim
My son passed last August and I had one experience where he was patting me on the arm - I woke up and my husband was snoring so it wasnāt him- I felt a sense of peace which I never feel like ever. Second experience was my son knocking on the back door and me running down to open it, I was saying whereāve you been? He said here , there and everywhere- he looked smart and handsome as usual - we chatted on the settee and then he went upstairs- I was calling after him. I woke up and thought he was in his bedroom and was devastated when I realised he wasnāt physically there.
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Hi jas1
Thank you for your reply. Glad to know itās not just me. It is quite comforting when it happens but also upsetting the morning after when reality hits.
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