Hi. Could I have the details of your medium please?
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Hi all, just putting this out there , A straw pole if you like. Just to gauge opinion.
We all deal with our grief in our own way. Recently had my sonās anniversary. Iām at a stage where I really donāt expect any messages from people. I donāt put anything on facebook or basically advertise that itās the anniversary. Iām absolutely fine with that I donāt for one minute expect other people to remember dates etc. everybody has their own lives to be getting on with. Thatās how it should be. But hereās the BUT!!! I live in Manchester. I have a very very close relative that lives in wales. Weāve been close my entire life. About a year ago a random bloke on the street where I live passed away. He wasnāt a family friend or someone my family had history with he was just someone that lived around here for years. There is no other connection other than he was a familiar face. Hereās the bit that I find strange. Annoying and just disrespectful. ( or is that just me). My relative comes up to Manchester 2 or 3 times a year and the last couple of times heās been to visit this manās grave. Even his own wife has said to him. Why are you visiting a random personās grave. My sons anniversary was roughly a couple of weeks ago. My wife and his wife were talking Having a girlie catch up and my wife just mentioned that we were going away for a couple of days as itās the anniversary. My brothers wife said. Oh rite Iāll let Jimās brother know. And that was it. Nothing!!! No phone call No message. Just no acknowledgement at all. Now I donāt expect sympathy and likes on fb. Or people ringing me up every anniversary and putting on the sick voice. How are you!!! Sending prayers. All that type of thing. But knowing my brother is visiting random graves and was pre warned it was my sonās anniversary I would have expected at least a text message or something just saying. Thinking of you today. Or something similar. But to get absolutely zero. Kind of really upset me. Iāve let it go now. But at the time I found it wrong. So the question is. Iām I over reacting
Ok thanks for listening
Take care. Jim
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Hi Jim, absolutely not over reacting. I can understand how upset/angry? you must feel. I admire how you say youāll let it go because that takes some doing.
Take care
Chris x
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Jim, you are absolutely not over reacting. I just donāt understand people sometimes. They can be so thoughtless and downright horrible. Iām sorry you experienced this.
I read this earlier and hope you find it helpful. When I read it this morning, I immediately thought of you for some reason.
Take care x
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Apart from the line that says āIām sorry I didnāt do moreā. Although I identify with that because of how Gemma passed away.
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Dear Chris, just wanted to say how lovely to hear from you and hope you are doing okay x
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Hi All. Our beautiful son died suddenly in his sleep on 6th April 2025 aged 27. Just under 8 weeks now and the pain I feel is intense. As we have no answer as yet for his cause of death we are struggling to get any help from any of the charities. The pain I have is not just mental itās physical and feels as though I cannot breathe. Our son Matt who passed away was our baby and younger brother to our 33 year old son who is really struggling with the loss of his brother. We are such a close family and Matt lived with us so his absence in our everyday lives, his mess, his food tastes, his genius with technology, his friends coming to visit or just the 4 of us going out for a meal has all gone. I feel as though I cannot take this intense pain anymore. How do we survive this grief when all I seem to do is cry, have panic attacks, canāt sleep or eat, it feels as though our lives have gone with our darling Matt. Please help us. We donāt know what to do and we wonāt know whatās happened to Matt for at least 6 months. Oh and we found him dead in his bed 4 hours after we last saw him. We had to move him to the floor and perform CPR so my husband and I are traumatised not only by the sudden death but also the trauma of finding him and trying to revive him. Am broken
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Hi Jen my heart hurts for you .the terrible shock of it all . Our babys should not leave before us .your going through ptsd .ur all lost and the not knowing and all the questions going round and round. Baby steps right now .your doing good to just get up in the morning .my boy was 25 .he had sarcoma lasted four months .he sounds like your son. Lived at home very close family unit .i have a daughter 33 they was best friends its been four years now thar sick feeling when you wake is it real gets easier be kind to yours self big hugs zoe xx
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Bless you all. What a terrible shock and the trauma of it all takes its toll on you physically as well as mentally. Its so hard to deal with. As you say, you dont find anywhere to outpour your grief but coming here where we all understand, will help you through the comong days , weeks and months or years ahead. Its 6 years in July since we lost our younger daughter and the friends on this site have helped me so much.
Sending love and strength to you.
Kate xxx
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So sorry for your loss. And thank you for replying. I am just so broken I donāt know how to live.
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So sorry for your loss. Thank you for replying and sharing your story. I donāt know how we will get through this. Just broken
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Sorry for your loss Kate. Thank you for replying. Itās so sad to hear your story. I am just so broken and my life feels as though itās ended
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So sorry to hear about the terrible loss of your darling son and the trauma of trying to revive him. My boy died unexpectedly aged 33 last November. All the bereaved parents on this forum will understand the agony you are going through. Please keep posting your thoughts. We are here to comfort and support you.
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Iām so very sorry to read of the tragic loss of your son, Matt. You are in shock, the only thing I can say is be kind to yourself, let the tears fall and talk about Matt, talk to anyone who will listen. There is no timeline to follow, grief is so very individual. We grieve hard because we loved so hard. This group has been my lifeline , sometimes typing your feelings out actually is very helpful. Every single one of us are here for you, we know exactly how you are feeling xxxx
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Thank you and so sorry that you are going through this too.
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Thank you. Itās just so intense
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Hi I understand the crippling pain you are going through. I lost my son 12 weeks ago. I think we can all relate to what you have said but this group has really helped. I do have bad moments most days but there is always some one who will reply to you and I think that helps. Love to you xx
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Thank you Sue and to everyone. I do hope this group can help. At the moment I am struggling in a world without my beautiful baby and cannot hold back the tears. The past 7 weeks have been mostly a blur I just donāt know how to keep going on and doing this. The pain in my heart is so intense, I also know at the moment I am probably not there 100% for my eldest son and husband which also pains me so greatly. Just so broken
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Dear Jen, like everyone here I am so sorry for the loss of your darling boy. We do understand here.
Be kind to yourself, cry, shout and scream if you have to ā¦ I did and at times felt as if I was going mad.
But gradually peace will descend for you and you will not feel so raw. It is baby steps now and try to take one day at a time. I am glad you have found us as we will always be here for you and will gather around you. Sending you love and peace xxx
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Thank you Victoria. Yes I do feel as though I am going mad and I cannot believe this is reality. I have been screaming when there is no one in the house. I donāt know how to get through this. I lost my dad when I was four so things have always been so tough. I met my childhood sweetheart my soulmate when I was 16 and we have been together since. My home life before I met him was awful no love so all I wanted was my own little family which I had and after many many years of struggling to pay our bills and mortgage etc we felt like we were finally able to start living and enjoying life more with our boys. I am crushed but hope the stories here and the strength you have all got help to pull me from this dark world I am in Thank you all 
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