Missing you 
How right your words are swift,I have read lots on the site but your words hit the button in me ,my wife of 35 years battled the cancer with me alongside the whole time .I find it difficult as you say,all the lots of friends have dropped off now “ they think they have done their bit” he will get over it ,oh no he won’t ,how can you ,I did say to one I had to leave the shopping trolley half full in tescos ,because I suddenly , felt like no reason ,started to cry, people looked at this man crying, I had to walk out not a soul said can I help or anything just the look of them as I tried to avoid any contact .I felt stupid ,lonely ,just wanted my wife.
And can’t even express now this bloody awful life that has started,can’t even ask her,.I know she is somewhere near as odd
Weired things happen to me or around me
I don’t cause them so it must be her,
I have tried,to analyse these things and the best I can do is she is there in my heart and the grief energy must release her at that time ,I know worry if it keeps happening to me will her energy be lost out of my heart ,I am so lost ,so screwed up,.so I just don’t know,.I don’t want a club a churc a walk in the park all I want is her back with me again ,that can’t happen ever again ,I forever talk to her ,get angry with her for being gone ,say to her I’m sorry for being angry I don’t mean to be ,tell her I love her still as always have done .then I realise I am Shirley valentine
Talking to the wall,please death come to me bring your scythe and chop me up that will be a relief compared to this ,I wish I didn’t have to be in this “ club” but I’m glad there is this club,why does this death figure only appear on New Year’s Eve? Don’t tell me I have to wait until then again,my wife died six weeks ago ,feels like yesterday ,I won’t last until then that is sure but does six weeks still feel like it in six years? Thanks all you people here
1 Like