Entertainment and exercise all in one 
, glad you had a good time, have a good day, just debating whether to get up or stay in bed.
Just got back nice coffee snuggled on sofa now with the cats
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They say itās good to talk! This site has been a godsend to me and has helped me to get through the unthinkable.
I am nearly 4 years in and it is still hard and I am so sad. How can I be otherwise when we were together for 57 years?
We did discuss how we would cope when one of us was left behind and I think that has helped a little. We both agreed that it would be ok if the person left behind were to start another relationship, but both agreed that we couldnāt bear the thought of that. (I strongly recommended having that conversation, hard though it may seem).
I must say, now that I am here alone, the thought of anyone else being my significant other makes me feel physically sick. Itās not that I disapprove. If you are the sort of person who can have and enjoy a new relationship, then I wish you all the best. I just canāt do it myself.
You canāt improve on perfection and I was lucky enough to have that. Funnily enough, I am not unhappy being alone in the flat, as such, just very sad that he isnāt here too.
I wish you all the best.
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Everyone is grieving on this site itās nice to talk to people who understand what youāre going through. No one could ever replace my soul mate we have lots of beautiful memories we did everything together. I donāt look to the future I take everyday as it comes and if I can make anyoneās day a bit better because I understand and am going through the same thing then I will tomorrows another day and Iām still living in it
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I totally agree with you. We will get through this.
Oood luck!
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Hi , I totally agree with you , this site has been a lifeline for me the past two years, there is always someone that understands how we feel .as each day can be different , different feelings ,different issues. Different sadness, yet all because we have lost our one true love, the biggest and best part of us , and finding it so hard to navigate our lives / existence now. Xtake carex
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Thatās, good, having coffee also, decided to get up, looking at pictures of her, wishing she was here, wishing the pain would go away, only peace I get is when asleep, but struggle to get to sleep, every time I close my eyes I see her last breath.
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Thank you, we did have the talk about moving on afterwards, but I agree with you, I couldnāt replace her, she didnāt want me to be on my own but all I want is to be with her.
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Same I went through different stages of grief I was angry with the world then couldnāt get that last day out of my mind. Mornings and nights are the worst. Canāt sleep as my brain is going over everything and mornings I donāt want to start another day. Iām now thinking of all the good times we had and will treasure. I will get up everyday for my grown children and grandchildren because they donāt want to lose me too they are already dealing with their own grief. I am trying to do the best I possibly can to live my life.
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You are doing an amazing job, far better than me, she knew I would be like this, and warned me not be like it, but just how do I deal with it all and try a move on with life.
Thank you for your kind words, they are a big help and inspiration.
Thanks trust me Iām a mess too but just baby steps. Iāve got to go back to work on 5th Feb Iām so nervous because Iām a totally different person now. I work in a primary school and have truly missed the children but I just feel my whole lifeās not the same anymore. Work colleagues have messaged me wanting chats and meet ups but Iām such a loner Iām not ready for that x
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Hi @Antonbw , I know only to well that not being able to sleep, when my husband first died, I often just sat out the back on a night ,looking at the stars and asking him where he was . I still donāt sleep very well , I keep waking every hour or so, and thatās after two years. My husband use to say I could sleep on a washing line . ā¦ So sorry for your loss , you will get a lot of support and help from this site , we all āget itā . I think only those that have lost their partners truly understand how heartbreaking it is . Xtake carex
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Thank you, itās a great help, I have been on my own and lost, it means a lot
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Debbie1966, you hit the nail on the head, I didnāt realise it until you said it, but I am a different person now as well, the old me went with her. I am not a social person I do t like people very much and am very much a loner, but being on this site has helped me, thank you
Iām always here to support x
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Thank you. X
Hi itās blue Monday today thatās exactly how I felt when I woke up. The sun was shining so i managed to get dressed and drive to local shops to get few things for the garden. It made me feel so much better taking my mind off things for couple hours. Got few new bits for the house but soon as I drove back and put my key in the door it hits me. Heās not here to talk to and show him what Iāve bought. Iām proud of myself for getting out instead of putting the duvet over my head today but hoping it will get a little better as time goes on x
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Well done you, I understand how you feel, I never want to get up for work (5am) but when I get to work - the distraction helps a lot ( or is it just sticking plaster - who knows) but hate coming home to an empty house - she would always be there asking how my days was, and there are times in the day when I think, oh I must ring Liz and tell her that, and then it hits me - but it doesnāt diminish - it hurts the same each time. Glad you got out, major milestone.
You can private message anytime you need a chat not sure how it works all new
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So sorry to read this. I lost my husband to bowel cancer just short of 2 years from diagnosis. Itās now been 9 months since he passed. On March 31st treatment was stopped & he was given a few months, we lost him in April 12th. It was just devastating.
9 months on I still feel as lost. I take things day by day. Not much more to say 
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