Good morning Stephen,
Your ghostly tales and poltergeist stories that you have to tell will be really fascinating so when you get a spare moment will you share please? If that’s ok. It sounds great!
Have a lovely day. Sending you warmest wishes. Wuu
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Hello Wuu.
Thank you for your interest. What i tell you has historical context too which i will explain. I will explain the activities and the ghosts first.
I meant to add that my grandma, mam’s mam also witnessed all of this when she came to call or was babysitting for me and Paul.
I know a lot of people think such stuff is rubbish but when you have lived it plus experienced stuff throughout life it cannot be dismissed.
The first simple thing was when dad was working and me, mam, grandma and Paul had been out this happened every time. As I said back to back terrace. We entered through the back which had a longish yard. One door and two windows. One up and one down.
When we came back and got to the gate and looked at the house, there was always a figure stood behind the net curtains in the upstairs bedroom. That was me and Paul’s room. We all used to see it at the same time. Walk up the path and it disappeared and then we unlocked the door.
Secondly, poltergeist activity. Not connected to seeing the ghosts. This could occur any time of the day. I will give you a few examples of things that did happen.
Plates and cutlery moving several inches on their own on the table. Banging noises from nowhere. Rooms going icy cold even though we had an open fire. Doors and cupboard doors opening and closing on their own. Lots more but you can imagine.
The first ghost. This ghost was seen in mam and dad’s bedroom never our bedroom. It was a ghost of an elderly lady dressed in Victorian clothing. Mam was in that room every night. Many nights on her own. The lady just used to appear. Moved about the room and then disappeared. She never spoke or made eye contact.
The second ghost. This ghost was in both bedrooms but mainly in me and Paul’s bedroom. This ghost was a monk. Dressed in black. One of the first times mam saw him was when my cot was in that room she came in and the monk dressed in black was stood over the cot looking down at me. I think mam said she shouted or screamed and then he disappeared.
Through the years he appeared on an irregular basis. Just when you thought you hadn’t seen it for a bit, it appeared. Daytime when me and Paul were playing with our toys in the bedroom and night time generally at the foot of the bed.
The context now which is important but no one could tell us what we had seen didn’t exist.
The Victorian terrace was a row of about 14 houses. Built in the early 1890s. Mam did some research. The first occupants were a husband and wife. The husband passed away before his wife. The lady passed away in 1921. Victorian lady sad looking in mam and dad’s bedroom.
People when or if we told them used to scoff at the monk. A black monk in a terraced house. Mam researched and found out this.
8 miles from us was Monk Bretton Priory. It housed Benedictine monks. Know as black monks because of their black robes. We used to live in a place called Goldthorpe. A couple of hundred yards from where the houses were built was land belonging to the monks at Bretton Priory. There they had farms and granges and mills which were looked after by black monks. The black monk in our house. Historic connection with the land.
As I said Wuu. When mam and dad could afford a house we moved. However, it isn’t unheard of for ghosts to move with families. That was what mam feared. Luckily they stayed there. The house is there now. It doesn’t look any different. I have been tempted to knock on the door and ask but you can imagine their reaction.
Lots more stuff too. Different houses. Different places and different times.
God bless Wuu. Sending you all my best wishes. Stephen.
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Hi sorry just butting in.
I’ve been a bereavement group and they are helpful with grief. The one I went to is mostly people who have lost there partners. The one I went are all older but most don’t have any family so I wouldn’t worry about that. I could tell that they enjoy each others company and wanted to lend an ear. They were all very friendly. Was more of a friendship cafe. I need to go back at some point.
And also I believe in spiritual experiences but only because my nan told me of many.
Take care.
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That’s a funny stories. Me and my nan used to laugh at things like that. She would say
‘ They can’t organise a piss up in a brewery’. That’s a lovely moment of laughter and warmth where you feel close to them again.
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Wow, those ghostly sightings and poltergeist activities would have scared me solid!
I agree, I don’t know how your mam could sleep with a wandering ghost and as for the black monk staring over the cot..I think I would have grabbed everything: cot, kids n all that night and stayed with a relative if that were possible.
Absolutely terrifying!
Really fascinating Stephen.
Thank you for sharing with us.
Warmest wishes to you. Wuu
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Hi Wuu.
Dad and mam had very little money and renting was the only option. Back then there was a 10 year waiting list for a council house. Remember dad did not believe. He always said he hadn’t seen anything so given all that it was near impossible for us to go anywhere and in those days when you married you married for life. 55 years married for mam and dad and they knew each other 59 years. This was at the time of dad passing away.
God bless and sending you all my best wishes Stephen
Hi Stephen,
Your mam and dad sounded very close and 59 years and then your dad passing it must’ve been so very hard for you all. Especially your lovely mam for those many years, a bond like that becomes immeasurable.
Your mam having that loss would definitely of been very, very sad for her (and you both) but your mam had you to take care of her.
For you to keep her as independent as she could be. And that I believe she was very proud of you.
To care for someone is not easy. Not even for a very close relative but when it’s done through care and love for that person is when it’s so much easier.
We cared for our mams/mums (and nans) because it was our second nature to do so.
Your mam could not have wished for better care and love from her son.
You show that in your posts here. She was very lucky to have you and for you to have her in your life.
It’s a special bond you have which will be present all around you: in your home: when you go out places and visit them at the cemetery.
Your lovely mam, dad, grandparents, I do believe are listening to you and guiding you each day.
Good night Stephen and sending you warmest wishes. Wuu
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Good morning Wuu.
Thank you so much for a very beautiful message. Your words are so heartfelt and caring. You loved and cared for your beautiful mum, as you said as we all did, not just through keeping her independent but throughout all your lives together.
What wonderful memories you both created together. In and out of your house too. All the places you visited. The bike rides that you went on together. You both did so well.
I know you and your mum also used to volunteer and do things to support other people. Such kindness devoting yourselves to lots of different causes and events.
You were there Wuu, as we all were, when our mums really needed that special care and love from us. They are our world and were always our world. Your mum is you. She sees through your eyes and she is always there standing alongside you. Guiding you.
God bless and have a good a day as possible. Sending you all my kindest regards and best wishes. Stephen.
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Hello Stephen, So interesting and your Mum was clever to research to find out the history. It sounds as though the spirits were living alongside you. You all coped well to remain there. I suppose they were not doing you any harm. Your Mum must have been scared though when she saw the monk standing over you in your cot. I wondered why he did that? Perhaps interested to see the little baby like we do. Like you say, I wonder if the current residents are experiencing anything. I am a little younger than you, but the tin bath was something that my Mum used to talk about as well. She also talked about the mangle. Life was so different than it is today. Mum used to say that when she grew up her family were poor, but clean. The monk being in your room and looking over you, with your Mum screaming reminded me of a story my Mum told me. My Mum lived upstairs in what she called the ‘old house.’ She lived in a room with my Dad and older sister in the house that my Nan also lived in. My Mum told me that my sister was very ill and she was worrying about her. She was tucking my sister into bed and as she looked up a lady dressed in white with flowing hair was standing there. Mum was not a catholic then, but said the lady was like an angel or the Virgin Mary. My Mum screamed on seeing the lady appear and my Dad and my uncle rushed up the stairs to find that the lady had gone. The next day, my sister had recovered. Mum thought that it was as though the lady was telling her not to worry that my sister would be okay. My Mum met my Dad when she was young. They were married for over 40 years. Like you said, marriage was for life. We were blessed to have such wonderful parents Stephen.
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Thank you … I suppose it depends on the group dynamics, but because everyone in the group is there for the same reason, people understand.
Good evening Sparrow2.
Your mum’s ghostly experience sounds a really positive one. Seeing the lady in white and then your sister improving the next day. As Shakespeare said through Hamlet: There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio,than are dreamt of in your philosophy. I used to teach it for A Level. It does apply to our experiences though.
Mum enjoyed learning, but left school at 15 and she enjoyed doing the research. She got a bit fed up, although we didn’t tell that many people about the monk, when they almost laughed and said a monk in a terrace house. I don’t believe it. It spurred mum on to find out.
The tin bath was heavy. It was on a big nail at the side of the outside toilet. Mam never weighed more than 7 and half stone but she used to manhandle it perfectly and get it filled and then me and my brother, one at each end, sat in it. Not much money. But so much love. Great memories.
I hope your day has been as good as it can be. I been looking at family documents again this afternoon. God bless and thanks for your message. Sending you all my best wishes Stephen
Good morning Stephen,
I hope you are ok?
The weather here is still as hot as ever which is not good as it can get very tiring.
Yesterday I went out to the next village to watch another band play with a bit of a twist, they were The steel pan band, really good. Bringing a bit of the Caribbean to a quiet village. Also there were classic cars on display too. Lots of little mini cars all done up. Crafting stalls, hot food and cakes.
Mum would have liked the afternoon.
I have had quite diverse things that I got on with over the weekend, from usual watering the garden-with carrying buckets of water to and fro. Then on Friday evening there was a ‘defib’ training down at our local Mem. Hall.
Hope your car is up and running well.
I think you’re off on your day trips?
How is the volunteering going-you’re definitely a valuable person there.
I hope you’re also feeling better as I know your grief journey was/is going to take a toll.
I wish you great strength and sending you positivity for today as always.
Kindest regards and warmest wishes to you Stephen. Take care Wuu
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Good afternoon Wuu.
Thank you for your lovely message. It sounds like you have been out and about and doing a big variety of things. The steel band sound very interesting. I have seen a steel band on telly, but not in person. A lovely sound to them.
They once did the defib training for staff at school when we had the equipment fitted. It is at least 8 years ago so I would need more training. Do you feel your mum is with you when you go out and about?
My car is a nightmare. Well getting it sorted is. I am in Pickering and Scarborough today. They supposed to pick the part up Saturday and fit it today. I will ring them soon ,but I cannot pick it up until tomorrow morning because they shut at six and I am not back till eight. I hope it is done because I need it for volunteering tomorrow. I had to cancel Friday because they had my car even though they could not do it.
For the last week i have been really down thinking about mam. A lot of crying. Like today I feel sad ,but once I get in I will cry. I had to ring Marie Curie bereavement support yesterday afternoon because I felt so sad and lonely. It helped. She listened to me talk about mam for half an hour.
We set off back at 4.45pm. A couple of hours journey and then a mile walk when I get off of the coach.
It is really lovely to hear from you Wuu and I am glad you are busy doing things.
God bless and sending you all my warmest wishes Stephen.
Hi Stephen,
When I get to go out n about I always ‘ask mum’ to join me. I like to think I can still go out on our little outings together. Now and then I can feel a good amount of time passes where I can become more connected in my surroundings and my mum memories just are paused with out any guilt or sadness when my memories of her come back.
But yesterday driving back I was driving with tears. If anyone one noticed they would’ve wondered. But it’s just me driving and I was so used to having mum sat next to me. Now it’s just my bag and phone.
Scarborough does have a magical pull for you I know as it was some where both you and your lovely mam loved to visit. So that’s very comforting for you I am sure.
Cars are such a reliance aren’t they? That when they stop working you don’t realise how dependent we become of them!
Although down here I could take busses it’s not like London where they are frequent and cheaper tickets. Here it’s a bit in the sticks and busses just take all day going around the houses for expensive ticket. So unless folk have all day and a bus pass the car is really the only option.
I hope your car will be ok for tomorrow as you’re volunteering at the museum and I’m sure they depend on you.
I agree that some of the grief cafe/workshops are helpful but they can be filled with sometimes irrelevant chatter. It’s something that I guess the group joining come from a broader perspective of loss. Where as here it can be more specific to like loss of our mums/mams and nans. And where as in the group sessions folk can chatter over one another sometimes, you can’t really do that in posts.
In addition to your key rings, cushion, framed art work your lovely mam made have you created any more keep sake treasured items?
I made a lavender mini bag and left it in the glove compartment of my car it is really lovely when I open it.
Have a lovely evening Stephen hope you had a lovely day ‘with’ your mam around you. Sending you warmest wishes. Wuu
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Hello Wuu.
You mentioned you were going to make some lavender bags. A good idea in the car. Did your mam like them? My mam did. She used to buy them from places we visited and put them in her drawer.
I fully empathise with your tears in the car. I do that too. Today, i was sat on a bench on the South Cliff. I was weeping a little and had a few odd looks. It is just that me and mam always sat there for at least ten to fifteen minutes looking out at the sea and the beautiful South Shore. I thought of her at my side and how many times we did it without even thinking how significant it was.
My car is done at last. I am walking to the garage in the morning and then from there straight to Doncaster.
I got back about 20 minutes ago. Put the lights and radio on. Said hello beautiful mam to mam’s cushion and then started crying.
The only thing I have done and I hope it works is this. I had an old phone I had 10 years. I have had this phone 2 years now. The screen cracked and it would not charge. I got the photos I took over the years off of the sim card, but there are some on the phone itself. So i took it to a fonebooth over a week ago and he said he should be able to get the pictures off. He did say he would ring me when it was done but I haven’t heard anything. I won’t call tomorrow. I will call on Friday. That will have been 2 weeks.
Goodnight and God bless Wuu. Best wishes Stephen
Good morning Stephen,
I think today you’re working at the museum? Sounds good and I am sure the people there are looking forward to you being there also.
The photos you mentioned that were stuck on an old phone sounds frustrating as I know that from experience.
Some of my old photos got lost from an old device.
Mum never took photos but I always did. Mum used to say I took the nicest photos of her. And I’d say ‘mum you’re always smiling!’
I’ve managed to save some to my email folders too and mums voice recordings that I did with us chatting just before she became extremely unwell. I just hope I don’t lose them.
But with all digital data I know we can’t take it with us and as long as we remember the treasured memories of our lovely mums that’s all that matters. Our mums and mams are apart of us forever.
Your Scarborough trip must give you great comfort and although you mention that when you return back home and ‘greet’ your lovely mam it can bring you to tears you know she loves to be with you on your travels.
Have a peaceful and enjoyable (museum and meeting people) day today Stephen. Sending you warmest wishes. Wuu
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Hello Wuu.
Thank you for your lovely message. Have you any plans today? I did my volunteering yesterday and thank you again for thinking of me. I really enjoyed it yesterday. There was a retired chap working with me called John. We had a lovely chat and met a lot of the public. When we parted he said he had really enjoyed it too.
Today I have been up at the cemetery. This afternoon I have my yearly appointment with my gastrointestinal consultant. A nice chap. It does make me think of last August. When i went and came back home, beautiful mam was sat in her chair to greet me. I got my brother to stay with mam while I went.
It is good that you have your mum’s pictures and voice recordings. They are such wonderful things to treasure. I know you say you were similar with photos from an old phone too.
I took it 2 weeks ago to the phone shop. He said give me a week ,but he said he would ring. He hasn’t, so i might ring the shop tomorrow to see what’s happening. I hope he can do it.
Your mum sounds a natural Wuu, always smiling like mam. She never took a bad picture, but when i showed her she had a variety of responses. I don’t think she realised how lovely she was. I know we are biased, but we both know that about our mums.
I haven’t listened to the voice recordings for a bit. I have 2 from when mam was in hospital and you can hear it in her voice. She had a gastrointestinal tube up her nose and down her throat. It makes me cry listening to it, thinking about it and writing it.
God bless. Take care and i send you all my warmest wishes.Stephen.
Hello Stephen, I have not been on for a few days as sorting out my room and it has not been straightforward and all consuming. My partner has his own issues and we have both been quite stressed with each other. I have been struggling. None of this is the ‘real’ positive happy me. I feel that I am going down a rabbit hole and need to pull myself out. Today is my birthday and the reality of Mum not here has hit me full on this morning. It is raw this morning and I’ve gone right back to the awful morning I got the call. I have not been able to stop sobbing. Usually I have a good cry and the release helps me which I think will happen. Please remember me in your prayers today, this awful grief journey. Take care
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Hello Sparrow2.
I will certainly remember you in my prayers today. You have been having such a tough time recently and this is compounded by your birthday.
I say that because last week i was thinking about my first birthday without mam which will be on the 20th of November. It isn’t even here yet and I could not stop crying thinking about mam not being with me and the lovely happy routine we had on the day.
So although I haven’t had my birthday yet, I can totally empathise with how you are feeling today. Such an emotional time and so heartbreaking.
We are so close to our mums. I still think that we are unique. There aren’t many people who live with their mum and dad all their lives like we on here have. It makes their absence so much more upsetting.
I bet you and your mum had a routine on your birthdays too. Me, mam and dad did. It was always the same for all three of us.
I will be thinking about you today. I will be praying and i know that with our mums, nothing can or will ever separate us from their love.
Please be as gentle with yourself as is possible today. I know how upset you are because you are like me. I know you, Wuu, Mccoy1 and me are such caring sensitive souls that because of the deepest bond that we had with our mums and nan is so great that it makes our grief all consuming.
God bless. Sending you all my support and prayers for today. Stephen.
Good morning Sparrow,
Firstly I want to wish you a happy birthday for today. 
I know it will be filled with mixed emotions as your lovely mum is not here to celebrate with you. But I know she will be spiritually with you.
Last November, when it was my birthday it was very sad without mum. And the November before was very stressful as that was when she became terribly sick and had her devastating prognosis.
I just remember mum standing by the shops near to where I had parked my car. She was very unstable standing and needed the loo too. She was telling me she would like to see the fireworks at the weekend. As November 5th is also my birthday. We were going to see this big free display near Watford. But I said ‘mum I think we could just watch a film instead?’ But she really preferred being out.
Well that outing didn’t happen and mum that weekend was taken to hospital by ambulance. Her health took a massive downturn.
‘Firsts’ without our lovely mums for support, our birthdays, Christmases and any celebration or goings’ out is very hard and I can really understand how all these events can make you feel so upset.
It’s hard to make any sense of our grief and how to deal with it.
So crying can be just about the only way our bodies and minds can deal with these emotions.
I will be thinking of you today especially as it’s your birthday and that IS something special.
Today is very much about you and your lovely mum. She will definitely remember you being born! And would definitely want you to be happy on your birthday. She would be upset if you were upset.
Please be kind to yourself knowing your lovely mum would hate to see you sad.
I do wish you a happy birthday.
Thinking of you today.
Sending you my kindest wishes, especially as it is your birthday.
Have a peaceful and lovely day. Wuu
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