When is too soon to go a date with someone
Before my husband passed he made me promise to grab any happiness that comes my way and not to sit about and be lonely
Even though no body can ever ever replace him I have met someone I didn’t go out my way out paths just crossed
I don’t know wether to go on a date as I don’t want to be judged
In an other way may be nice to have abit of company
Marie x
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I understand totally. Lots of people say “when you are ready “. I am 66, my husband passed away 2 and a half years ago. I too would like to meet someone, just to get dressed up to go out, for a meal or a show. I don’t want to live with anyone. That’s opens up a whole can of worms with inheritance! Just someone to give me a proper hug! I think I’m too old though for all this swiping’ I wouldn’t even know how.
If you’re younger than me go for it. Don’t be lonely. Xx
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Hi
I’m so sorry for your loss
Thankyou for your kind reply it’s nice to know someone is on my side
I’m the same all I want is some company maybe a meal or cinema
I’m 53 was with my husband for 25 years
I too don’t ever want to live with any one else
Thankyou again
Marie x
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I lost my husband to cancer 18 months ago - he was 45 and it broke me as we had a wonderful marriage.
Like everyone here I’ve been to hell and back - no one can even grasp at the depths of pain until you’ve lost.
I wasn’t looking but I’ve met the most amazing man - never thought in a million years !
He is the kindest of souls , warm, loving and I know he would be thoroughly approved of as he has made me smile again.
Will it last ? Who knows - I hope so but if not it has proved to me that happiness is there if you’re brave enough to let it in .
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Hi
I’m sorry for your loss
What you say is very true that’s how I feel too Thank you
Marie x
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Hi, my childhood sweetheart and I made contact a few years ago on Facebook, he lost his wife to cancer 3 years ago and I comforted him as best I could over the phone, he lives overseas. My husband passed 14 months ago from cancer too and he has been such a rock to me. He is waiting for covid to be properly controlled so that we can see each other. He knows it’s too soon for me but it’s rather wonderful to know that someone out there cares for me . He has always loved me and I know he wants to marry me, but it’s all too soon. It’s great how we can laugh together and cry together. I’m just not ready, I had 38 years of a wonderful marriage and I really am not sure if I want to marry again. Especially since we live in different countries. But who knows. I suppose at our age we should enjoy what we have. I’m still deeply mourning my husband but he always makes me feel good when we talk. I just thought I would share this with you all. I’m 70 and he is 72! You know when we were young and we broke up, he swore that one day he would be with me even if we were in our 70’s! Amazing really, so I agree if you find happiness grab it by both hands it’s what our beloveds would have wanted, of course in your own time, when you feel ready. Good luck!
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It is so so difficult to move forward. Feelings of betrayal, of confusion, comparing, memories, never knowing when the grief will surface again.
I met someone a year after my beloved Ron passed. He is a wonderful kind hearted person who has done so much for me and I have moments of intense passion for him
but then a simple memory of my Ron pops into my head and I feel it is all so futile. I have burst into tears at the simplest thing and J can’t explain myself. I feel there are too many past memories that are blocking me making new ones.
But being with him had also helped me through despair, and loneliness and he has taught me to live a little again so I take it a day at a time as I take my grief. Maybe one day it will all come together. I don’t plan anything anymore. I just allow it to happen.
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How do people meet new people? I wouldn’t want to do on line stuff. I haven’t even taken my rings off yet. Xx
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It’s difficult, I have no plans, to meet , any one, but guess you never know.but the someone new, always be in the shadows, of the person you loved. They would probably understand, but would it just be too much.
Sorry for your loss Thankyou for your kind words
Marie x
When I was going for grief counselling it was 7 months after my husband of 25 years had died and I was chatting to a former boyfriend who wanted to date and I felt disloyal to my late husband. The Psychologist asked me one question : she asked which of my 2 children I loved the most? I told her that I couldn’t answer that and she said that my love is different for each of my children and that is how I must look at dating my old boyfriend is that my love will never be the same as I had for my late husband and I must never compare it. She also said that few people get a second chance at love and I must grab it with both hands. She also said if you had a good marriage you are more likely to get married again. She was right, it was hard, but worth it. I’m happily married again. No one will ever replace my late husband and I still love him with all my heart, but I also love my new husband in a different way and he understands that. People will always judge you, no matter what you do. Do what makes you happy x
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I think you have got to do what feels right for you, I only lost my husband 5 months ago, but I feel there is no point in living on my own, so meeting someone would help me but I’m still to sad to even chat, everyone is different, only you know what is right for you, go with your gut feeling xxx
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Go for it life is too short .My kids have both said they would like me meet someone when Im ready.Bill has been dead for 14 months now .I am not looking to replace him but I do believe you can love more than once in your life and it not be disloyal or a problem Most of our grieve is very private and no one knows how much we miss our partners .I can never forget Bill he is a part of me but in the right cicumstances I would love to meet a nice man …But its also ok if that never happens I intend to embrace life going forward Bill fought so hard to live and I want to make the most of my life in remberence of him .All the best to you my dear and every happiness in your future 
x
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Thank you for your message it’s been a real comfort to me
Marie x
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Thankyou so much for your message
I’m feeling I should just be on my own
My kids have disowned me because I went on a date I am so hurt
Marie x
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Again, there is no right or wrong, it simply doesn’t matter, what any one else thinks, if you meet someone, and it feels right, then it’s right. I would say don’t force anything, move forward at your own pace. I can only really speak for myself, but Shell, would want me to be happy, sure that is true of all of our passed loved ones. Love to all , let’s hope we find some comfort.
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@Dotty666 hi dotty I am so sorry that your kids have done that I hope you guys manage to work things out sending hugs
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Pete
First of all I’m sorry for your loss
You are right my darling husband made me promise that I would love on and not be on my own he said he wanted me to be happy with some one who would look after me like he did
Ok it is abit quick but I never went looking for someone it was the first time I had been out for 3 years
It feels right it doesn’t mean I have forgotten about my husband I never ever will I will always love him
No body will ever compare to him
Marie x
It sounds disrespectful to say life goes on, but sadly our loved ones are not here in a physical sense, but they are a part of us. If you find happiness, in what ever way then take it, some would maybe disagree, they have every right to, you can only do what you feel is right. Personally I don’t think I will find anyone else, but I not opposed to.it. if there is one thing these last 18 months have shown, anything can happen, bean bad so far, but hopefully things will change. Xxx
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