My beautiful wife died in her early 50s very suddenly and tragically from a routine procedure at the hospital. There were zero risk of death from this procedure. She was perfectly fit and healthy. Nobody can fully understand how it tragically resulted in death. I just want to join her. We have been married 4 days shy of our Pearl anniversary which was on the 11.11.2025. We have never had any affairs and shared everything together. Our marriage was like a Fairy tale. Some things are too good to be true…hence her death.
10 Likes
So sorry to hear the pain that you are in. Only those who have walked this devastating path can truly understand how we feel. I daresay you feel angry to have lost your wife at such a young age, I know how that feels. The mixed emotions of deep sadness and the anger you feel towards others who have not had to experience devastating loss, so far, Is exhausting. I suppose we only feel this way because we have lost so much, whereas those who have never known real love or taken their marriage for granted would not understand our pain. I don’t know whether it helps you in any way, but I take comfort in knowing that my dear husband will never have to go through this agony.
Take care of yourself, easier to say than do when you couldn’t care less, but grief is so debilitating . I find letting it all out on here very helpful. No one on here is judging you. It’s like arriving in a foreign country unable to speak the language and suddenly hearing someone speaking in your language.
6 Likes
So very sorry for your loss.
I’m lost for words really. How do you come to terms with such a loss and circumstances of it. Beyond cruel.
When I lost my husband of 43 yrs (but together I was 16) I thought noone will know how this feels. But I now realise I am not the only person to have lost the only thing in life worth living for.
Like you two we totally loved one another. Didn’t need anyone else in our lives. We were the envy of many. It was pure utter love for all our years together.
My heart goes out to you. No wise words. Trying to plough through myself. But please know you are not on your own.
6 Likes
I just want to die and join her. The pain is excruciating. When did he die? How old was he? The sad reality was….she was not suppose to die through such a routine procedure. There is zero chance of death. That is why I am so confused as this cannot possibly be real
3 Likes
My journey was so different to yours. Hideous but different! He was 70 and I am 62.
But you know what this your time to let your fears out. All what we all feel and understand here. It is hell on earth.
Just use this site to let it out! All of it! The raw, ugly and scary parts too!
5 Likes
He died 26/9/25
4 Likes
No wise words, but I do know the pain all of those who make contact on here feel and just want to try and help.
5 Likes
Just imagine a torture….the pain is so great…that killing yourself would be a lesser pain.
2 Likes
Envy of others….they were jealous…even my only son was wishing he had a relationship like my wife and I. He was envious but some were jealous.
3 Likes
I have thought the same many times but I just can’t in case I cause any further pain to others. Please keep reaching out on here.
4 Likes
Yes I saw jealously many times. Even people to make their relationships like ours. Wanted to be us!
Young and old.
I have no idea what our futures can possibly be in the years to come.
I feel it may be my best acting role ahead! As I’m just going through the motions of living. My life ended on 26/09/2025 @ 5.32. 
6 Likes
I hear your pain Elio and it is so raw. I’m in the depths of despair these days. My Ray had his 60th in that damn awful hospital and 12 days later he left me, after a diagnosis of 6 weeks with pancreatic cancer. I’ll never unsee the suffering he went through.
The most beautiful kindest man I’ve ever known. The love of my life.
Take care and keep reading here. Please say how you feel whatever it is, we all know the depth of this grief we feel for the loss of our loves. It is a tough path and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
4 Likes
It came as a shock. She was very healthy. Death was not on the plate. It was a low risk operation. How can it possibly happen in an advanced economy in 2025. The pre operation pamphlet said that at worse she will have a sore voice for a week. That was why we decided to go for it. Risks of death…none. Zero. Zilch.
1 Like
Came as a shock Peggy. Nobody had even so much as had a whiff that there was a chance she would die. How could she? It was a simple routine 1hour + operation…discharged next day. All her things and life is in mid air. No time to prepare. Bit like a plane crash…eg MH17 and MH370
1 Like
I cannot begin to feel your awful pain, but I no this sounds stupid at this stage of your loss. Let grief take its course as we dont have control over that horrid emotion.. I hope your journey is a peaceful one. God bless you.
3 Likes
@Elio hi just so heartbreaking to read what’s happened.I know my situation isn’t the same as yours as I recently lost my mum unexpectedly in hospital due to complications which had nothing to do with why she was there.
The suddenness of it all has turned your life completely upside down.The big questions of what…how must be the silent cry with you every moment of everyday.
How does one even begin to process this and Just how could this very low risk procedure cause your dear wife to pass away?
Did the hospital explain what actually happened?Was there any negligence on their part?
My mums sad demise was due to a measure negligence and when it got flagged up…she was gone by the next morning
The pain…The trauma…The constant heart rendering agony…that soul crushing sense of an emptiness of life now that this precious wife who you loved deeply and who loved you in the same way is an turmoil that could only be cured by her being in your life again.
Iam so glad that you’re part of this forum and many others will definitely identify and provide real compassion towards you
4 Likes
Hey Ho for NHS. When I had my appendicitis, I had corridor care, who did not care. I rang GP urgently in at 8.30am suspecting it to be appendicitis. No call back was received. My wife [now dead] rushed back at 3pm and rang the GP who informed us that we must now go to A and E as they cannot help. At A&E it was corridor care. The filtering GP immediately knew it was urgent so asked for me to be rushed for surgery. You know what? They said there were no surgeons available so will have wait till morning when they might operate depending on what urgency they have. As it was soooo long, the Appendix had turned gangrene. After the surgery there were no beds in recovery as it was taken up by NURSING HOME patients. He should have been discharged 3 months ago..but has nowhere to go. He did his poo on purpose on the bed in the middle of the night so that they continue to keep him there. In all honesty, I think he might still be there. Why? I do not go to hospital. I have not needed it, yet when I needed it, it was not there. Is this UK? or is it Afghanistan?? Yes the system is broken but there are victims, innocent victims who do not deserve to be “victims”.
3 Likes
OMG that’s the same date my partner passed last year but it was at 2.10pm. I found him in the kitchen when I returned home. I understand how you feel. The pain is awful. I don’t want to cause pain to my sister otherwise I d just check out.
2 Likes
I’m so sorry for your loss. Your circumstances are different to mine but I lost my partner suddenly five months ago. I worked in health care for many years and I find it negligent that you were told there was zero risk. Every procedure carries some risk however low and that should have been explained to you. I hope they’ve given you an explanation of what went wrong. You can still pursue this in the months to come when your mind may be better able to process things. That said you must be devastated. Grief can be relentless, it’s a monster that follows you and comes at you every day. I hope you have some family and friends who can help you navigate this horrible path.
4 Likes
How old was your husband when he passed on? Did he go to the hospital? Yes…my wife was a medic too.