I have just found this site. Three weeks ago, my 28 year old son Daniel (Dan) was found dead in his flat from natural causes. We don’t know & will never know why he died, there are only theories, the post mortem was inconclusive. That & the fact he died alone is tormenting me. Has anyone else been through this? How did you find peace? You all seem so supportive, I wish you all love, peace & support x
Hi Tree
So sorry for Daniel’s passing.
My father died similarly. Inconclusive usually means a cardiac arrest which is electrical and cant be found on autopsy. That is what we believe happened to my dad. An irregular heart rhythm can cause it - too slow or too fast or not in rhythm. Could be simple as dehydration or more complex as a heart irregularity or a genetic sodium issue. The doctors should have been able to narrow that down.
It is so painful to suffer this kind of grief. We coped just with time passing. Many months of stress, not eating, hiding in your house. Little by little you come to terms. We are biological machines and sometimes something critical goes catastrophically wrong. It does not make sense. It may not ever make sense.
You will find support on here.
Take one day at a time. Be kind to yourself. Be sure to hydrate. Try to reduce your responsibilities in all aspects of life as best as you can. It is stressful and you do not need any more of it.
Warmly,
Ell
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Hi tree my name is linzy and I lost my son to a very brutal knife attack 4 months ago his name was Taylor and he was a beautiful gentle kind hearted boy with the world at his feet he was stabbed 50+ times and he died all alone on the murderes floor 8m absolutely heartbroken and now just been told the culprit is pleading insanity and they will be a trial which i have to be a witness so i know your pain and I’m so sorry for the loss of your son theres days I feel like I carnt carry on and then theres days I feel so strong like I need to keep my boys memory alive i find a lot of comfort in watching medium shows that proves to me there is an afterlife meaning our boys are happy and at peace I also have spoken to a medium via video chat and he told me some very accurate things and told me my boy didn’t die alone my nanna was with him all the time and he was unconscious and felt no pain my mum also got a reading by the same guy but he had no clue we were related and he told her the same as me that my nanna was with him and that he didn’t feel any pain my mum also got another reading done by a lady and she verified what the first medium told her so at the minute that is what is keeping me going I’ve also had a few little signs like a ring necked dove that comes to my garden everyday and a beautiful butterfly landed on my hand while out walking we found a place to sit and I was talking about my son saying how he would love the view next thing a butterfly started flying around me so I put my palm out infront of me and it flew straight on it I got a lovely warm feeling I really felt he was with me once again I’m so sorry for your loss and I would love to tell u it gets easier but it’s not always the case I feel u just learn to deal with your grief better look out for little signs from your son coz I truly believe that he will be trying his hardest to heal your pain godbless u stay strong and live your life how your son would want u to xxx
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Hi, I am going through something similar and struggling massively. 2 weeks ago my brother 31 years old was found dead in his house who he shares with another person. Similar sort of thing in that the initial post mortem states cardiac respiratory arrest but that this is only temporary cause. We have been told about 3 months for further reasons. I am so shocked/upset/angry that this has happened. Xx the heartbreak and unanswered questions are horrendous x
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Hi @Xxdna, I’m so sorry to hear about the death of your brother - it sounds as though it was a huge shock and you have so many unanswered questions. I noticed this was your first post, so I just wanted to let you know that someone had seen your post.
I hope that it helps even a little to be able to share things here on the site. You’ve posted a reply to an existing conversation. When you feel ready, you may also wish to start a new conversation in the Losing a Sibling category - you should then get some supportive replies.
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Thank you, so sorry for your loss too xxxx
Thank you so much xx One day at a time is what we are doing, some days come easier than others. Buried his ashes today, on his grandads plot. Now we have somewhere to visit, that helps. Thank you for your kind words, it helps that other people know how this feels, my love & sympathy to you xx
Hi so sorry for your loss, I too lost my 23 year old son 3 weeks ago cause of death is unknown yet he was at a friends house we are heartbroken as you are, I believe the death of a child is particularly hard to bear, my son Matt was kind and caring with a wicked sense of humour it’s so hard to think of a world without our beloved children , unfortunately I also lost my daughter ten years ago who had cerebral palsy I just felt I was beginning to live again and now this has happened, we will both get stronger in time but our lives will never be the same I’m trying to block things out a little just to cope but it always comes back with a massive wave of pain, do you have any other family I hope you are not alone take care from someone who understands your pain x
Awwww godbless u I’m so sorry for your loss too I can understand how heartbroken u are and to lose 2 children is utterly devastating I have a good family and boyfriend and also have a 7 year old boy who is absolutely amazing and so strong he is the only thing that keeps me going but I just miss Taylor so much as u will miss your boy and your daughter it’s a pain I’ve never felt its crushing and one I know I will never recover from I’m just hoping I will be able to deal with it a bit better I’m still not able to go to his grave and it’s been over 4 months I send u all my love and hope u are ok and thankyou so much for your message it means so much to me xx
I’m so sorry for your loss. I can relate as 9 weeks ago my 22 year old son passed away suddenly in his sleep. The post mortem was inconclusive. Since further extensive tests they have concluded SADS sudden arrhythmia death syndrome. I am distraught with grief & cannot see a way forward 
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Hi @Tree74
I wondered how you are doing. We are in similar circumstances as we lost our precious son in June to sudden arrhythmia death syndrome. We (mum, dad & brother) are waiting for tests to be done on our hearts. How are you coping? Do you have other children?
Sending love and strength xx
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