My wonderful husbands funeral / celebration of life was yesterday. It was so,hard to say goodbye to him at the end of the ceremony (he died just over 5 weeks ago) . But afterwards the wake was a good feeling, lots of people came and I felt surrounded by their love and well wishes. It felt as though he was still with us and I guess that’s how these things go.
Today is unbearable though. I now feel truly alone. He has gone and there is no more I can do for him. And I can never be with him again. I feel even worse now than the day he died and I didn’t believe that was possible. I don’t know how to get through this
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Dear @Sandra7 I’m so sorry for your loss. The time after a funeral is very hard in its own way. I’ve only just found it myself but this message board community seems a friendly and supportive place, especially if you don’t have many people you can reach out to. Take care, be gentle with yourself, and just try to be with your feelings, they are only to be expected and perfectly normal. My thoughts are with you
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You are not alone we are always here for you and just because you can’t see your husband doesn’t mean he not with you anymore he watching you from above where he is free of pain
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I feel exactly the same as you! Totally heartbroken, my husband died 7 months ago of leukaemia, i would have done anything for him , but it wasn’t to be, I feel very lonely too, miss him every single day, but hoped in time, things will gradually get easier, hugs to you xx
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@Sandra7 I’m so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and the pain (yes, it’s pain like no other and only if you have been through it
can you relate). Take care of yourself. x
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Not alone darling, we’re here for you.
Nigel
xx
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Thank you, it’s nice to know that we’re not alone even when we feel we are! Nigel, how long have you been widowed? It’s such a long existence at the moment trying to navigate life alone, but hopefully with time it will get easier, I miss my husband every day and today especially feels like it was yesterday, im in tears again and feeling so down
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My beautiful wife passed 25th July so it’s still very raw. I love her so much .
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I love my husband very much too, we were together for 36 years, married for 35 i was 18! It’s hard to comprehend he won’t be here anymore 
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I know it just seems so wrong that she’s not here. We were together for 42 wonderful years.
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I totally get it. Totally!
My partner of 28 years died on the 9th July I miss her so much. I am inside out, my minds a mess, life’s a mess.
She worked for DWP for 40 years, They have just told me I will get a dependants pension of £3.00 a week !
I don’t have a job I resigned to care for her, no pension. I will now have to sell the house we shared with all its memories and start again at 64!
All this when I am destroyed with grief. evil world.
There’s no let up in this grief it’s just getting worse every day.
Sleep is a joke , eating is difficult. The days are filled with empty ness.
Sorry having a really bad time.
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I felt exactly the same as you at the funeral I was in total bit’s but I have learned to cope with the grief a little bit better now and now I can do the things that we used to do, but now I am on my own. I miss her terribly and talk to her all the time but I still have to struggle with some of my feelings and I am trying to get through this terrible ordeal basically on my own as my family live 2hrs away my partners son 's one is handicapped with mobility issues, and the other one is working. So we have to grin and bear it and soldier on and hopefully we will get through this. With knowing what our loved one is looking down on us and giving us guidance deepest regards Eddie
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Thank you - it’s so hard right now and I can only hope things will improve with time - it seems they do sometimes from what I read on here
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Thank you Nigel - that’s lovely to hear - I know on this site we are not alone… I am sorry your wife died so recently - my husband died 8th July.
X
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Thanks for replying and sorry you have additional worries as well as your grief. It is so hard going on without that other special person after so many years
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Thank you for replying - at the moment it does feel really really bad but I can only hope to take it. It by bit and day by day. I am trying to do things every day and get out meeting people to give me something to focus on. Talk to him all the time at home though
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Dear Sandra. This is the first time I have replied to anyone but I felt compelled to write to you. I am so sorry for your loss. I can completely relate to how you are feeling. My darling husband passed away on the 21st April this year. He had been doing so well & was in remission with his leukaemia. He was working in the garden & had a fall but he thought he had just lost his footing. A few days late he was unable to walk & was violently sick. He was admitted into hospital & diagnosed with secondary brain cancer & died just 10 days after the diagnosis.
I have been in total shock & I can’t quite get my head around that he’s gone. I have good support from family & friends but when I am alone it is so hard. I have a strong faith & I do think it helps. (That doesn’t mean I don’t get angry with God)! My advice is to talk about your husband as much as you want to. Don’t bottle up your pain & cry when you want to. It is perfectly normal & grief is part of the healing process. You will have better days in time but you will still have your set backs. I was told by my minister that the greater the love the harder the parting. How true this is. Be kind to yourself Sandra & take good care of yourself. x
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Your words are a comfort to us all. I allow myself to cry but consider every time I stop to be one little victory over the sadness.
Nigel xx
Thank you Nigel. We will get there for as it takes won’t we. You take care now. x
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I try to be as happy as I can, but it doesn’t always happen. Sometimes I am the same as everyone else in this situation, crying and feeling down, but you have to pick yourself up and soldier on, to quote a common saying. Regards Eddie
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