Totally agree it’s almost 2 years since I lost my wife, best friend & Soulmate for me I got though the first year stumbling through the many firsts, birthday’s anniversary’s and so on since over coming these milestones it’s starting to really sink in that I’ll never see her again and this year is worse because I’m thinking more clearly yet friends and family carry on as if life has moved on but those of use who have lost half of themselves because of the loss of a loved one
So we go though the motions of getting on with life yet all the time want to scream out at our loss.
You are not alone we on in this group understand the pain you are going through sending hugs from us all in the community.
Hi Cathphil
I understand how you feel. I lost my darling hubby 5 years ago. I still talk to him as if he is walking with me every day.
I have to wear a mask just to be polite. Inside I still feel so very lost with out him.
I also feel very lonely. Sending you a big hug and to all who are also lost.
Gather as many cuddles with your dear fur-babies. x
It’s been 2 years since said goodbye and I like others have posted - still talk to him. Evenings are always the hardest. Our dogs are my main comfort, they can tell when I need that extra bit of support. The hole and ache is still there underneath,
Oh yes they do, I for one.
Next Tuesday is the first anniversary of my husband’s passing. My Bob was my lovely husband, soulmate and best friend.
It’s only us who have lost can truly understand the absence and the silence.
Like you, not dogs but we were thinking of getting one but a cat appeared and without her I don’t know what I’d do, she follows me everywhere.
All I have relief is that my Bob is out of pain now. He could talk but after his second stroke it sounded like a foreign language. He had difficulty walking and couldn’t write or do anything I had to care for him 24/7.
No one will replace him.
Keep strong we have to
I fully understand, it is nearly three years since I lost my beloved hubby - my soul mate and dearest friend. It’s as painful as the first day - perhaps more so as the unbearable reality with time passing bears down. Death is something our brains can’t quite accept or bear. Life can be unbearable but made worse by others who think you have moved on.
Thank you so very much for all the lovely lovely replies. Each and every one special , heartfelt and received with so much love
You have all made my soul smile.
Thank you
Love hugs and strength to you all
Hi Cathphil
I too am thankful for all of the kind folk on here that reach out to each other. This is why we are here, to hold each other up with love and understanding.
Thank you for posting please stay in touch as we are always here to pick each other up, send loving thoughts and a little strength when ever it’s needed.
Hi it’s 20mths since i lost the other half of me and im really struggling again
The first year is all consuming the second for me is realisation that this is now my life and my darling hubby is never coming back
At 55 people say to me oh you can move on. They have no clue you cant move on as they say.
I am just trying to navigate the best way o can. I understan and feel every word youve all written x
Michelle
@Daisy24 I was also 55 & you’re right you don’t move on, people don’t understand how hurtful saying that is, I’d describe it as moving forward. This week I was out with friends, a couple. She had gone to the bar & I was sat with her husband & someone (an acquaintance from the pub me & my husband used to go to) asked if he was my new partner, after she’d asked how long ago my husband had died!!! I was so upset as to how insensitive people can be, even nearly 6 years on. It really took me aback.
Take care
Its ridiculous they just dont understand. If you havent been through it you cant possibly understand.
I had someone say to me go on line dating youve got 20+yrs you need another man in your life.
I am not ruling out needing companionship in the future but andrew wasnt just a man he was my friend, soulmate companion the other half that made me whole.
He was 35 yrs of my life my everything.
I am sure people mean well but …
Im so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in March this year, I’m 62 and I felt that I was too young to be widowed as before and even during my husband’s cancer diagnosis we both kept ourselves fit, always on the go, walking, cycling, (always joking about not feeling our ages) but 55 is younger again, its so unfair so I totally understand the way you are feeling.
I’m only in the first year and I’m also thinking to myself… is this now how its going to be? Living alone and trying to keep myself busy to get me through the days. I no longer work as I chose to give up my job to care for my husband so I’ve no structure to my days at all and hardly any human contact.
And you are right people haven’t got a clue, unless they go through this terrible journey themselves they’ll never understand.
Losing some you loved so deeply is incredible difficult but remember this is your journey and i’m sure when the time is right you will make the right decision and make the right choice.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts this morning. I sure I’ll have same decision to make in the future❤️
Thanks for that i was 53 when he passed and he was only 58.
I am working but from home the choice i made to be with andrew. To be honest we did everything together didnt need anyone else but now it makes things so hard.
How do you suddenly start to make friends let alone anything else.
I am sure it will all sort itself in the end you have to believe that dont you thats why we put one foot in front of the other every day x
Your relationship with Andrew sounds identical to Ian and I. We didn’t need anyone else, except when we were in work, we were together 24/7 that’s why without him I feel so lost.
Our so called friends, some we lost contact with over the years attended Ian’s funeral and said on the day that they will all keep in touch, but they’re all empty promises. Ive now come to the conclusion im on my own!!
I’m not looking for another man because i know i would struggle with that, and no one in this world could ever replace Ian. Just a loyal and truthful friend to go for coffee perhaps a little holiday, mind you that’s a big ask because I have actually have 3 sisters who can’t even be bothered to pick up the phone!! But there you are that’s family again, busy wrapped up in their own lives!!
I know ive said it before but if we don’t take care of ourselves no one else will, so make sure you look after yourself.
That would be lovely!! Ian and I loved Devon and Cornwall beautiful part of the country
Ian used to be the main driver but since he’s gone ive driven to Newquay in West Wales and Somerset, another 2 locations we loved visiting. Driving is my only escape these days.
Ok thats a plan i am also up for meeting in the future.
Private message me when youre ready abd we can organise something.
Im on the devon cornwall border it is beautiful i must admit
I’m smiling to myself now because both Ian and I were fans of escape to the country and always said that if we had the chance we’d escape to the coast either to Devon or Cornwall😊.
Thanks Michelle, I’ll definitely message you privately to discuss the plan and hopefully set a date.
