I have just found myself with a few days off and an empty homes I just don’t no what werse I work in a hospital and it’s getting ready for what could be. I sitting in an empty house with no one here. I never felt so alone I no and always have thay we can cope with anything as long as we have someone to stand by us someone or something that’s worth having. I feel like I lost the life I was trying to rebuild all over agen empty house for its not a home do nothing for the sole just reinforced the loss we were all isolated before in awer way but at least we could get out. I no I still have work but I would like to discuss the day when I get home and have that someone that makes all this worth it. I’m just feeling sorry for myself just pull myself together. i am concerned that there will be a lot more of us on this site before this is over I hope not but I no its possible loss is one of the worst thing out its the loneliness that comes with it that’s hardest to cope with.
Hi,
Know exactly how you are feeling and so does everyone on here.
This situation has made everything so much worse, there’s more time to dwell on everything and wish that our husbands were here to help us through this scary time . Like you say , coming back from work and talking about the day, to come back to an empty house, you feel what’s the point.
We just seem to go to work, keep busy , just to keep our minds occupied, it sometimes seems we’re not living anymore because there’s no one to share it with.
It must be so hard and heartbreaking for newly bereaved people at this time, to feel so isolated and alone.
Keep posting, this site does help me a lot especially during this awful time.
Try and keep strong.
Steph x
I hear what you are saying about the emptiness of the house when we lose someone who had always been there suddenly nothing seems right . Working like you do in a hospital at this challenging of times would be difficult at any time but magnify that 1000 times more when you are already trying to cope with your own loss …be kind to yourself …we CAN do this x
Your jobs working in hospitals must be so hard with everything going on, we all appreciate everything you do.
Thinking of you x
Not having your love one at home … to talk too … to make a cup of tea for … is so so painful… my beautiful wife was always on top of the list of my text message list… no more though …
Our minds are powerful tools Jerry1 …your wife will always stay on the top of your list there…memories we store can always be accessed at any time of the day or night…let’s all take a moment of our day today to capture one of those good memories …visualize …the memory …what is it…what was good about it…what was done what was said …etc …like I said our minds are powerful tools …they can bring us joy as well as sadness …
You’re so right x
Dear Jerry
I continued to pay for my husband’s phone and still do. No answers but occasionally I still send it a text -just as I would have done - the usual text -such as waiting for daughter - love you… be home soon. Mad definitely - but only I know !! I still try and think he is in another room in the house - it helps me. And when I go out (which is never now ) but just pottering about the kitchen I keep the radio on with chat in the background - silence these days is not golden.
Again it helps me and it may help others.
Trisha xxx
It is so hard getting used to living without them. I still find myself subconsciously checking my phone - I’m sure our loved ones would text us if they could 
hi Trisha
we have to do what ever helps us,and nothing is wrong as long as its working,
keep doing anything that helps you.same with everybody else,i wear Jaynes night socks,and use Jaynes night gown ,tee shirt and have all the cuddlies ive ever brought for Jayne.am I insane ,probably, but it helps me feel close to Jayne. and thats all that matters to me.
regards ian
I have found a company that turn clothes belonging to those we have lost into things such as memory bears
…they can add messages / sounds ect …cant wait to get mine back eventually…I sent several items that were my husband’s favourites / colours ect …like you say anything that helps make us feel closer to those we love is a good thing …
Dear Ian
I wear Gary’s socks - but I always used to get in to trouble and ‘borrow’ them for under boots. I did give most of his clothes to a homeless hostel as he was such a caring person I know we would have wanted this. But kept a few of his favourites and they will stay in the wardrobe. Of all things - writing to him every night is probably what helps me most .
He was always the romantic one so have lots of cards where he told me how much he loved me - but still too painful to look at often. And he was a musician all his life so I have lots of footage of him in bands - but again too painful to watch and I know somewhere in the mountains of tapes there is one of him singing me a love song he wrote… Just wish he was here .
xx
hi Trisha
I cannot let any of Jayne items go, I’ve given things away that were mine or I’d bought, as regards same here got 28 years of birthday Christmas and valentines some years we just used old cards, but mostly new ones. Got over 100, some to me some from me to Jayne, I’ve even contacted the tattooists today asking be told once this virus and pandemic is over, assuming i’m still alive of course, going have another tattoo dedicated to my baby Jayne, this will be an exact copy of Jaynes hand writing of what ever is wrote in a particular card, will be trawling through them to find my fav, I love them all so it will be tough. And before losing Jayne I didn’t ever want a tattoo, but because of whats gone on and me not having any of Jaynes ashes was my way of showing my love for Jayne and keeping her close. So this would be my 4th tattoo assuming it eventually happens.
Gary sounds like a wonderful human being and very good partner and that’s why we love and miss them so much.
warm regards
Ian
damn flagged my post as pressed delete instead of edit grrrr hoping will be returned so can edit
Hi Jianye,
I have returned your comment to it’s previous version, so you should be able to edit it now. Let me know if you have any problems and I’ll do what I can to help you.
Best Wishes,
Hazel
Online Community Team
Hi Ian how are you ( silly question) haven’t heard from you for a few days xx
hi Hazel it wont let me edit ,first words dont make sense grr please can you help thank you
hi Alex in a word crap.i couldn’t get on yesterday because my dns was screwing up and the only site I could not access was Sueryder very strange,
hope your finding ways to cope
Hi Jianye,
I’ve made a few little changes. Is that better now?
All the best,
Hazel
Aw I’ve kept busy today but still hurting badly only just started eating after a week I’ve lost so much weight and can’t afford too as I’m only slim anyway. Need to give my head a good shake but when I eat it makes me feel sick 