To find this site is a ‘blessing in itself’ & grateful for what Sue Ryder created……
On reading others similar stories, has helped that others ‘totally feel the same pain’ & ripped out heart feeling we have experienced unfortunately too.
I am 52 with 2 beautiful girls of 14 & 21. I have been with the ‘love of my life for 25 years & married 22 years’…we had the most happiest, family life Ii could of wished for My gorgeous Husband/amazing Dadda was 58 & the fittest man ever, when he suddenly passed away in Spain in his sleep, following a boys weekend away.
They had travelled out on the Thursday early morning & had the ‘best day in the sun at ‘his beloved beach bar in the world…this was literally his ‘fav place ever’.
I have great videos & memories sent to me from the day & I spoke with him/messaged that evening before he went to bed, as even had an earlier night, as had 2 more fun nights planned. …he was so looking forward to the weekend break.
However, 4 weeks before this trip, my Husband, youngest Daughter & I had also been to Spain for a great weeks holiday & on returning he had a pain in left arm & chest for 5 mins first thing in morning. He went straight to A&E the following morning when we returned & they undertook ECG, bloods, Covid test & even done a CT scan with dye, as whilst ge was they asked him to walk a little & his oxygen levels dropped from 95 to 81 in minutes which is unreal…they thought he had a clot in his lung but didn’t show. His blood pressure was high, even with being on heart blood tablets, so he was discharged (really shouldn’t of been) & sent 3 days later to have a cardio echo gram at the hospital, which was also ok & then made an appt for the Cardiologist to see him in a week & half…then it went further wrong, as the Cardiologist told him he had angina, sent him on his way with a GTN spray & told him they would arrange an angiogram in 4 weeks, so no ‘real concern of urgency’s’ relayed to him.
What’s more upsetting we have private health care & my Husband wasn’t in pain st all during the day, it was literally fir 5 mins in morning when got up & moved around so was do clearly a blockage to his heart…,between A&E & a Cardiologist, with all his cardiac symptoms & family history of heart issues, in 4 weeks no 30 mins angiogram was done & I believe would of showed blockages & stents put in & still here today….this is what makes it all so hurtful, in that could of been avoided.
The pain of then having to deal with repatriation & getting him home from Spain then took a further 4 weeks & funeral then 2 weeks after as so busy….I am also having to deal with the Embassy to apply to the court in Spain to get my Husband’s post mortem report, as they do not return in Spain due to I believe Human Right Act. This can take anything from 6 months to 2 years….I was only advised he had severe coronary heart disease on the certificate……
I am devastated, but also angry gir so many reasons with NHS, my Husband too.
I live for my girls now, as know my Husband would be saying make sure you make most of your life with the girls, as life is too short & font we know it….
To find this site is a ‘blessing in itself’ & grateful for what Sue Ryder created……
I am so so sorry for your loss and everything you are having to deal with. The sudden shock of losing your loved one is incomprehensible and unbearable. My husband, Phil, went out cycling on the 24th of November last year and never came home. He died due to cardiac arrest from undiagnosed
Sorry hadn’t finished
Undiagnosed coronary heart disease. He’d had tests at the hospital a few weeks before his death and was waiting for an exercise ECG. I can only say get through each minute of each hour of each day as best you can.
Sending my thoughts and hug to you and your family x
My husband died in May he was fir healthy never smoked hardly drank played golf twice a week and was not overweight we went for a weekend away and he has slight chest pain in afternoon which went off and did not go to neck arm or back(I was a nurse for 35 years) in the late evening he went downstairs to see to the dogs who were barking it was thunder and lightning came back upstairs grey clammy and sweating rung 999 four hours later they arrived rushed him to hospital tried to stent him but he was in complete heart block died on the table no warnings no high blood pressure to cholesterol absolutely bereft can’t stop crying we were together 50 years he was 72
@Janr I’m so sorry for your loss. My partner died suddenly in the same way, on 15 October. He went swimming and never returned
I sympathise with all of you.
I too lost my soul mate in November 2021, he had a pilots license and had an extensive medical for his licence 4 weeks before he passed away very suddenly. He was told there were no issues.
He was very fit, not overweight, didn’t smoke and he jogged 3 times a week, also cycled and swam regularly.
The post mortem said he had severe coronary heart disease, he went out for a jog and was found on the side of the road and couldn’t be resuscitated.
I am heartbroken and will never get over the shock. He was 59.
It’s just unbelievable that someone can have severe heart disease and show no symptoms.
I am very grateful to have this forum as it only people who have been through the trauma of sudden death who really understand how devestating it is.
Love to all
@Muldool I totally agree how unbelievable it is. My partner was similarly extremely fit - run and swam most days - and was a vegan and didn’t drink! He’d also recently stopped eating sugar. He was 56
Thank you for your message & my heart breaks for your similar loss also…how old was your Husband?
I have been doing a lot of research into coronary heart disease & it is the biggest silent killer in men… most men start having symptoms as early as 40 & I feel more awareness/tests should be undertaken on men & women too; in relation to this awful disease, especially as is taking far too many; far too early in life. I feel I want to start something to bring to attention somehow.
I hope time does help to deal with the pain, but miss him so much….
Thank you for your reply & so very sorry to hear of your shocking news also…it is so hard to comprehend how your life can change so drastically & the shock alone is heartbreaking to even comprehend with. I hope you have the love & support of family/friends around you. How old was your Husband? Take care xx
My heart breaks for you also….sending a virtual hug….life is so unfair & not sure I’m alone in feeling ‘why happens to us’
My heart reaches out to you also, as you like me we’re not with you’re Husband when it happened & the shock I& being told will stay with me forever
So sorry for your loss, as our Husbands were nearly the same age…mine was 57 & had been a PE Instructor for over 35 years….the ‘why does it happen to younger, healthy people makes it even harder to comprehend. Life is so cruel & unfair. It makes it so more unbearable when it is sudden unexpected & I never even got to say goodbye , as the repatriation took over 4 weeks to even get him home & then had deteriorated for me to see him, so only time I then saw him , was in the church on the day of the funeral in the coffin I had chosen & that was then the heart wrenching reality of it all .
Stay strong & let’s hope time gives us some hope that the pain gets a little easier
Thank you for your kind words and thoughts it is so helpful knowing I am not alone
The shock and loss is unbearable
It is so helpful to find other people with the same experience it makes me feel less alone
Life is so cruel I still can’t understand why there was no warning I hope you have good friends and family to support you stay strong
I agree I spoke to a cardiac nurse from British heart foundation who said it’s very common and even when ECG is performed it doesn’t always show up
If it doesn’t show on that or blood tests how are people ever going to know
Every day nd night is hard despite support it is so nice to talk to people who understand the pain and loss xx
I feel like it’s too big for my head to comprehend or deal with it if that makes sense? It’s bigger than me. Like a bomb has gone off. Keep thinking I should have processed it by now… It’s been 9 months
He was 73 we had been together 50 years
I have two close fantastic friends and two daughters and their husbands also five grandkids so I am lucky but unless you have been through it you don’t understand it’s very raw as he only died in May
I don’t think there is a time limit good days bad days everyone grieves differently take the good days as a plus’s it’s the shock and no warning or time to adjust
I know exactly how you feel my thoughts are with you xx
Thanks for you reply, it is just horrible, I do have very good support from Petes sister and his parents, my own family live 100 miles away but also give me as much support as they can.
I’m sorry for your loss too.
I’ve been told that if Pete had symptoms it would have been investigated and that if he wasn’t so fit he would probably have died sooner, they said only 10% of his heart was working properly.
I just don’t understand how we had no idea there was anything wrong.
I’ve also been told that a third of people die this way.
I guess judging by the amount of us on here saying the same thing it could be true.
It’s very scary.
This is the only place I feel I can voice all the stuff that goes round my head and its helps to know other people understand because sometimes I feel like I’m going mad, I’m always trying to figure out how this could happen.
My anxiety is through the roof and I find mys worrying about everything and everyone around me.
If I see anyone jogging it scares me and I can’t look at them for fear they will collapse in front of me.