Thank you for your kind words. It is a feeling that is impossible to explain and I agree, unless you have experienced this, I dont think you can ever anticipate the level of emotional pain.
Yesterday was the worst day so far, I honestly thought I was breaking into pieces. Today I’m back to being numb.
I have my daughter who is 20 and son is 15. They are truly amazing but I am holding back the emotions at times so not to upset them even more. They stayed at their dad’s last night so I was on my own and I just couldn’t help but shout at my poor husband for leaving me. I’m sure that’s normal???
Anyway, I guess I might be reaching out again at some point. It seems to be a supportive group so thank you.
Your old friend sounds like a clueless individual. They obviously haven’t experienced deep loss. You can do without friends like that. I hope you have someone who can help you with the funeral arrangements as your head will be all over the place. I found I had total brain fog and my memory was dreadful. Losing the person you love, especially a partner/spouse is really awful. Take care.
Hi Lilly, when ever you feel like chatting or letting off steam we are hear for you. It’s important to look after yourself now it’s going to be hard but I’m sure you’ll cope. Just one step at a time.
Wishing you all the strength you’ll need
Tom
It’s so hard this journey we have to go through my husband passed October l miss him so much bee married 55 years l have a lovely family but they have there own life’s lm so sorry for your loss but we need to get through this earlier said then done but we need to
Hi Dia, It is very hard as you say. I met my lovely wife at 18 we were married almost forty years. Seeing that pretty girl walking past me was the best thing that could have ever happend to me. I certainly made sure to follow her home, only problem was she lived in Spain so I had to pack my bags and get a move on before I lost her to someone else.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
Hi Buddhabelly, I really sorry to hear that your husband died three days ago. There isn’t much to say right now, there is only the horrific pain of being ripped apart. I hope you can find some solace here where everyone is suffering from the same. I hope you have people around you to support you at this time.
Wishing you all the strength you’ll need
Tom
It’s like there is no getting away from it. Everywhere I go reminders that I’m alone. We did a lot together and we live semi rural so every time I go out people ask where/ how he is ….. I don’t have the words.
I wish I had the answers for this. Everything reminds you of them and also what you can no longer do. This morning I suddenly thought I’ve no one to go on holiday with! God knows why that upset me so much but I realised everyone I know have a partner.
I totally get it. You don’t notice these things at all until it’s taken from you.
I’ve done my 1st food shop today, that was harder than I expected as I wanted to keep picking things up I would usually get him. I even felt tearful when I bought 4 potatoes in a bag and now we only need 3. I did not think I’d be so emotionally invested in jacket potatoes!!!
I always got him some daffodils at this time of year as it was his mum’s favourite flower so since she’s passed away, i would get some for his office (worked at home). I still bought some today.
Are you managing to get out of do even little things at the minute? It’s so hard but I’ve found it has helped. I’ve got a dog so had a nice walk in the woods. I really did not want to go but I did it.
My condolences for your loss, from someone whose husband passed round about the same time as yours. My husband died on Easter Saturday 4.4.26 from loposarcoma. a rare but deadly cancer.
All of us here are supportive as we are all in the same ‘club’, having been recently bereaved of loved ones, shocked, despairing and sad.
It’s good that you are managing to go out and that this is helping. I have been out every day since my husband passed, as I know that staying indoors will only make me feel desperate and suicidal. I do acknowledge that this is not the same for everyone.
My condolences to you. I have a good idea of how you must feel as my husband passed at around the same time as yours. I have done some food shopping but it does not seem so different as before my husband died, as, in the last few weeks in particular, he ate very little, due to a tumour at close proximity to his stomach, reducing its size.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s a rubbish club to be in isn’t it? My husband died on the 3rd. Good Friday (although there was nothing good about it!!)
I’ve just posted on another thread on the circumstances.
Yes I’ve been out most days. It’s hard and I don’t want to but having a little dog means I do go. My son who is 15 and daughter is 20 both live with me. It’s hard because I have to stay strong for them so we are kind of taking it in turns to have a bad day. They have been amazing.
I’m out every morning with our dog, but cannot face a food shop. My hubby was misdiagnosed 9 times. He actually had tumours pressing on his windpipe . So I’m angry as well as sad
Hi Lilly I hope you are managing. It must be difficult to handle the childrens feelings and yours at the same time. As for crying, I don’t cry as much as I used to but one of the times today was because the company that does our security alarm had changed it’s name and I thought my wife would never know. Such a daft thing set me off.
Wishing you a peaceful evening
And a quiet day tomorrow
Tom
I understand the anger, it is part of the process anyway but in your circumstances it must be so hard.
I shouted out loud at my husband the other day for leaving me. Then I felt so bad. He would have laughed though. I also told him off for his poor administration of his paperwork. There is no order to anything and I’m struggling find what I need. That was so typical of him.
He was only 49 and although he had type 1 diabetes and a chronic blood cancer, he’s seen both consultants the same week and all seemed to be going ok. He’d had the cancer since 2019 and so far hadn’t needed treatment, just monitoring.
Anyway, I’m sure I’ll be telling him off again as time goes on and still sifting though unorganised chaos!!
