Hi Helen, I hope you found a bereavement group or a therapist to help you find some peace. It’s so important to talk through your feelings.
Wishing you a peaceful evening and a good nights sleep.
All the best
Tom 
I tried Tom, long waiting list to get any help, just endless online forms to be put on waiting list, no bereavement groups in my town, can`t face going 20 miles to the nearest one, even walked into our local church but no vicar around. Thank you for caring.
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Hi Helen, I do worry and I think there are still things you can do. I was looking into online options and from what I see the easiest one that has no waiting lists or forms to fill in is GriefChat that works from nine in the morning to nine at night. You can get find it in one of two websites MuchLoved or AtaLoss. The other posibility is for you to phone the local Vícar or Priest in your town. It is quite normal now to not find them in the church as they have other duities. I can’t offer much more advice as I don’t live in England and I can only look on the internet for you but I’m sure other people here may have more options or may have used other services. I really hope you find something to help you deal with your grief.
Wishing you all the strength you need.
All the best
Tom
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Thank you very much Tom. I will look into these options, I don`t think I can bear this grief much longer. I am so lost without Norman, he was always the stronger mentally of us both, and I always leaned on him for support. Everything in our home and outside is a trigger for me, when my phone rings I first think, thats Norman, as he was always phoning me, then I realise its the corona or chief medical officer or funeral people.
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Hi Helen, you are still suffering the unbearable pain at the beginning of this horrible journey. It’s important now to take each day at a time and look after yourself now. Things will calm down and become more bearable and finding help is a great start. I really hope you have some peace today
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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Thank you for being so kind
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Helen, I’m happy to chat anytime… today is a week on this journey for me
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Thank you Buddhabelly, Im 10 days in. I did phone the samaritans last night, as I felt I just cant go on, but to be honest it didnt help. I think you are supposed to talk whilst they just listen, I think I was hoping they`d have a magic wand to make the despair go away. Didn`t work for me, I actually felt worse and terminated the call. I just can`t imagine having to carry on feeling like this, day after day, week after week, month after month. I`ve just had a call from Pilgrims Hospice who I contacted, but again, it made me feel worse having to relive all the details of losing Norman. Thank you for reaching out, and so sorry for your loss.
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Hi Helen, Even today after almost 7 weeks I can’t really go into details of exactly what, when how my husband died as I start getting flashbacks, panic attacks and I break down. Also the first few days after he died I could hardly hold on a 3 minute conversation. I found it extremely tiring and painful and asked people not to keep calling me because I was in so much pain. Now I can chat in person and over the phone but the first week was hell on earth. Sending you a big hug
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Thank you Anita, so sorry for the loss of your husband. I think you are right, it is too early for me for those sort of conversations. I just had to terminate another councellor, on the griefchat webpage, he was asking for the same details, I just kept thinking what the hell does it matter of the how and when. I think it`s just to early for me, and all I really want is someone to wave a magic wand and bring my Norman back, or at least make this hell go away. Thank you for caring.
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Hi Helen, I understand what you are saying about having to relive everything when talking on the phone etc, that’s why I think it would be better if possible to find something local. When my wife died I took all the pain I was feeling out on body lifting weights and walking until I dropped, I used to think if I have a heart attack so be it but apart from keeping me busy I think it helped my mental state. This doesn’t mean I think you should do the same but finding something to occupy your mind and body might help
Thinking of you and wishing you all the best
Tom
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Thank you Brandon. I do go out for a little walk by the river every day, just looking at the ducks. I always used to do this as I used to love walking in nature, but everything seems so grey now, even though the sun is shining. But I will carry on, and try to make the walks a bit longer like I used to do. Thank you again for all your kind words.
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Helen, it is now over 5 weeks since my husband died and last night, on the phone with my sister, was the first time I’ve managed to even mention him briefly without bursting into tears. Give yourself time.
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Thank you Stealaway, I will do.
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How have you been. I lost my beautiful partner only 3 months ago, I miss him so much. I too have no family nearby. I do have 2 sons who check in but are busy working. Have you got any neighbours or good friends who can pop in. Are you able to get out yet to get some air. Try to eat when you can, sleep when you can and be kind to yourself 
LJ x
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It’s really good that you are getting out for a little walk everyday. Hugs
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Hi LJ. So sorry about your beautiful partner. Seems unbelievable, doesn`t it. None of it seems real. Nice neighbours but not close, to be honest I dont feel like talking to anyone in person anyway. Had a fried egg on toast earlier, first thing Ive eaten in ages. Can`t sleep, GP gave me some very low strength tablets which do nothing. Just stare at the wall all night. Thank you for caring. x
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It’s very early days 
, as long as you try to eat a little. I’m still only eating small amounts, but drinking water when I can too. It is an awful road we have found ourselves on. Thinking of you 
x
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Yes, appetite has vanished completely. Best wishes LJ x
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I hope you manage to have a restful evening x
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