Can anyone tell me if they have felt like I do. I lost my wonderful husband 42 suddenly 6 weeks ago and I still wake up most mornings feeling so sick and nauseous. I feel like this will never pass. I start to feel better physically as the morning goes on .
Thanks xx
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Hi. Jools. Fear and anxiety will do that especially in the mornings. Our metabolic rate, the rate at which we use energy, is low at that time, and often in the evenings. The fact that you feel better as the day progresses proves that. Yes, I have felt this too, but not in bereavement but anxiety, the symptoms of which are very similar. We may think that nothing could be worse than grief, but chronic anxiety can be as bad as anyone who has been there will know. It’s so early days for you. This will pass as you learn to live with your fears. A the moment the old saying applies. ‘One day at a time, even one hour at a time’. Try and give yourself time to adjust to life as it is now. This may not seem possible at the moment, but later it will.
Be kind to yourself and take care. Blessings.
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Hello Jools I have exactly that same sick feeling in the morning, not always straightaway but just suddenly and quite violently. Thank you Jonathan for understanding and making some sense of it for us x
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I’m nearly 4 weeks since I suddenly lost my wife. I wake up. Think I will manage better today then bang. It hits me. The knife twist and turns. Go with your body. Don’t expect to much from yourself. As previously said take each day or hour at a time.
I get the sickness as well and sudden bursts of panic but I’ve also found on losing my hair which is really really upsetting me
Every time I brush it loads seems to be on the brush
I’m sure it’s stress but it adds to my misery
Stress does all sorts of things to your body. Your dealing with so much at once
I too am losing my hair, 25 weeks into losing my husband on 1st January. I think it is the stress and anxiety .
Think that must be reasonably normal Suekatie, keep finding the plug hole blocked after a shower. Because we’re grieving so much, and hurting so much we’re kind of forgetting how we are also in shock and our bodies are reacting, as well as our hearts. Take care x
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I’m finding it so hard to cope
It’s all so painful isn’t it
Yes. I’m sitting here in tears. Just can’t stop
Yes it is devastating. There are some lovely people on here with words of wisdom who know exactly what we are going through. It’s good to know we are not alone
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This site has definitely saved me. Got no one else
I do understand that. Cry your tears . This is the worst of times for you
Thank god for all you lovely people on here, it really helps x
Hi bjane
Sorry to hear your having similar physical symptoms hopefully it will get slightly easier in time for us! X
I really want to stop crying and find a way through the grief but I just can’t
My daughter thinks I should pull myself together I know my grief upsets her and reminds her she’s lost her dad ( she is 30 )
I’m picking his ashes up tomorrow and bringing him home
It has to doesn’t it Jools. At least it helps to know others are feeling the same way so we aren’t alone. So, so hard nobody can understand unless they’ve been there, this loss of a partner is off the pain scale for so many reasons.The worst thing that’s ever happened and the only person you really need who could help you can’t be there, My lovely husband was there for me when my Mum and then my dad died and was just wonderful when I had a hysterectomy . I just miss him so much, how are we going to manage? x
Suekatie I hope picking up his ashes will bring you some comfort, bringing him home made me feel closer to him and I talk to him, on the bed, all the time. It’s a lovely willow casket and I kiss him goodnight at bed time and tell him I love him. Probably sad, but I find it helps a bit x
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Hi suekatie,
It’s so hard to try a find a way through grief.
I don’t think you can just pull yourself together, we feel so desperately sad, that all we can do is cry.
It’s seven months since I lost my husband to cardiac arrest and at the beginning I was in such a state, crying , screaming, couldn’t eat or sleep, just walking around in a zombie state, I really couldn’t of pulled myself together nothing mattered anymore. My eldest daughter whose also 30, couldn’t handle seeing me like that and kept away for a while, you have to cry let everything out, you can’t bottle it all up.
I’ve got my husband’s ashes here, and it does bring me comfort having him back home , I talk to him and kiss him, but when I collected his ashes I just broke down at the realisation of it all, you are going to find it very hard, but you will find comfort with him being back home.
Steph x
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Hi bjane
I am sure we will get the strength we need to get us through each day . It is the worst painful heartache I have ever felt. I lost my Dad suddenly when he was just 40 years ago and it was just awful but the pain of losing your soul mate is on another level. There are just so many things I miss . Yes I definitely miss the comfort & security my husband gave me he just knew how to make everything all right. I have my daughters whom I’m so grateful for but I don’t want to burden them they’re going through their own grief too. Xx