Hello Carl,
I live in kent an there is a beautiful place called the Seekers Trust you can stay in a cottage in their lovely grounds at little cost. They also do spiritual healing and prayers for you.
I am sure that if you goggle spiritual retreats you will find one near you.
I wanted my ex husband Laura’s dad to have a reading with a medium. He lives in the Philippines and could not come to her funeral. They do telephone and online reading but like yourself he was not keen on the idea.
I was lucky the medium l went to was very empathetic and l really got so much comfort from him.
It is natural to go back and think could l have done more?
I am sure that he knew how much you loved him.
Please be kind to yourself remember the happy times and celebrate your sons life.
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