Hi. My partner collapsed and died completely out of the blue two weeks ago and because it was so sudden and unexpected and in a public place a post mortem was needed. It was two weeks yesterday and we still haven’t heard anything although they did say there was a backlog. I did read that post mortems should be done within a few days of the death for the most accurate results. How long have other people waited for the results to come back? Does the coroners office ring you themselves with the findings or do they go back to the doctors? Has anyone ever had inconclusive post mortem results? If so what happens then? The waiting is horrendous, myself and his family just need to know what happened so we can try and make sense of it all. We have spoken with the funeral directors who has done all the other funerals in the family, he came to see us today and he’s provisionally booked a date for three weeks away but it all depends on the post mortem results coming back and my partners body being released by the end of next week. Just curious as to other people’s experiences x
My mum died at home unexpectedly (though it was pretty obviously a cardiac arrest) and as she hadn’t seen her doctor in the last two weeks we had to have a post mortem. It felt so cruel so I appreciate the extra layer of pain it is causing you.
In my case, the post mortem took just under 3 weeks. The coroner phoned me directly to let me know it had been concluded, the findings and that they were happy these were conclusive and did not need an inquest. They informed the funeral director and mum’s body was released and the next steps happened. The coroner sent an update to our GP too. It also meant the final death certificate was created etc.
If the post mortem is inconclusive they may take it to an inquest and sadly that can be months away but they have all they need for further investigation and will usually supply an interim death certificate and the funeral can go ahead.
I am so sorry you have had to find yourself here and hope you can find some moments of peace in these very raw days
Beki xx
Sorry for the loss of your mam, my mam is also gone. It seems rather cruel to make you go through a post mortem if your mam died at home, in our case it’s needed but your family should have been given a choice.
In a way the post mortem will give us the answers we desperately need and hopefully help us get our heads around what happened. To just collapse suddenly the assumption is it was either a heart attack or a cardiac arrest. To have this confirmed would at least give us an answer as to why this happened and hopefully it will prove that he wouldn’t have known anything about it. It’s the waiting that’s the hardest part. How long after the post mortem was complete did your mams body get released? x
Hi Lil
As soon as the coroner phoned me her body was released her and the funeral director collected within a day
Hi, my partner passed away unexpectedly in hospital 4 weeks ago. Paramedics came out and said it was a stomach bug and told her just to get Bascopan from the chemist. 2 days later another ambulance was called and after a day waiting in A&E they decided they were going to admit her for Biliary Colic. She spoke to me at 16:15, I packed her belonging for her hospital stay. She was “found” unresponsive at 17:20 and died of internal bleeding not Colic.
Sorry to go off the subject, it just still angers me.
A post mortem was carried out which took just under 2weeks. The written report has been emailed to me today. Last week we were able to register the death so 3 weeks from the date she passed.
Unfortunately I was advised by the funeral directors that in this individual case, not to go to the chapel of rest because of the length of time that had passed and affected her body. I think having. PM adds to the distress both in time, and waiting for the details. We still didn’t get all the answers and I wish some paramedics would consider carefully before they tell people just to ring their GP.
Oh gosh, no wonder it’s angered you. It must leave you constantly wondering what would have happened if they had taken her seriously in the beginning. Of course you’re going to be angry. I always say we are lucky to have the NHS but sometimes they just don’t take things seriously enough and fob people off resulting in people losing their lives and ruining the lives of the families left behind. I’m so sorry you have to go through this.
Yes the post mortem does add extra stress but in our case we needed answers ourselves. It was so sudden that it was assumed it was his heart and it was but we needed to know. We waited two and a half weeks and that time was horrendous. There should be a time limit on post mortems I think because I think it’s common for people to miss the chance of seeing their loved ones in the Chapel of rest. We did go and see my partner in the Chapel of rest three weeks after he passed, the funeral directors said we needed to see him sooner rather than later and when we went his face had changed already. We saw him, placed some teddies in with him and spoke to him for a while. The next time we rang them to go and see him again they advised a closed casket. Today we went down for the final time before the funeral, I took my letter and a single red rose and left them ontop of the coffin so they could put them in later. It’s horrendous. The pain is like nothing I’ve ever felt before 
Tiffiany I have sent you a private message regarding dealing with the coroners I myself am not happy with how they’ve dealt with things
Arh, I dropped off a single rose to the funeral directors to put in with my mum to. It was her favourite flower and I asked them to place in on her chest and have her holding it like a princess 
We went to the florist to hand in our cards to put on his funeral flowers so I asked for a single red rose. It was a really big one and really beautiful. I wrote a letter, it was six pages long. I poured my heart out and said everything that I needed to say. I know it’s silly because he can’t read it but I had so much that I felt was unsaid. The not getting to say goodbye and having so much I need to say to him is the thing that’s killing me the most 
Yes, I too have ordered a single rose which I will ask the funeral directors to place in her coffin next week before her funeral. Just wondering if I even want to drop that off on my own or go with someone.
I went on my own on the way to my Grandmas, I did ring the funeral director beforehand to let them know and they offered to pick it up but cause I had my chance stolen to see her in the chapel of rest due to the coroners delaying things I felt I wanted to personally deliver it as my final gift to my Mum, I just felt like I needed to do it for some reason, but if you have anyone to go with them bring them if it brings you comfort x
Now I’m thinking I should have waited until Wednesday or Thursday before taking it down because it will probably not be very good by Friday 
Ah I don’t know, now I’m thinking that’s something else I’ve failed on
It is really emotional so I would maybe ask someone to go with you and if you don’t feel like you need them at the time maybe they can wait in the car.
Lol I had the exact same thought as you I dropped it off feeling slightly good for doing so and then I was like its going to be dead by the time of the funeral we seriously cannot win with the way our emotions are going it’s kind of ridiculous x
I’m feeling really guilty about this now I’m probably being irrational but I feel like I’m failing him constantly. I can’t even time a bloody rose right. It just didn’t enter my head until now
Oh I’ve had enough of today. I’m going to bed to feel sorry for myself I think and hopefully I won’t feel like this tomorrow Night.
No you haven’t failed him at all. Even though I had that thought I then thought so what it still means something even if it doesnt last till the funeral. My mum probably would have laughed at my silly thinking deary me x
I believe extra priority should be given in these types of circumstance to speed up the process. No managing to bury/cremate/have funeral is extra unrest on family. I felt different after funeral in that we laid father to rest. The week he was with the coroners and for scans was a flurry of emotions with knowing where he was transported to at each moment. Now I understand this was part of a want for attachment whilst in state of shock
7 weeks on and 3 weeks since the funeral, I am still waiting for the coroners findings, it’s just awful making people wait as long as they do x
That’s no good. Family need closure.
All I want to know is that my mum didn’t suffer, don’t really care about anything else cause it won’t bring her back 
but I feel tortured not knowing what happened to her x
Have you contacted the coroner again recently? Might be worthwile to check if the report is there already but not actioned. Or stuck in the process. I’m no expert in how long these things take but I received after a week. The “not knowing” isn’t good