Hi. All. There have been some interesting posts on this subject, and I think there would be more if people didn’t feel they are weird in some way. My experience in this and how I became interested is a long story. But although I never did bereavement counselling, so many came up with surprising events that had happened to them after a loss that I began to investigate.
Oxford University, many years ago, did an anonymous survey asking people if they had experienced any psychic phenomena. Because it was anonymous thousands replied.
One of the biggest problems is that so many don’t tell their stories because of fear of ridicule.
“But I see nobody there,-
No body moves about the green,
Or wanders the heavy trees between.
Ah! That’s because you do not bear
The visioning power of souls who dare
To pierce the material screen”.
‘Pierce the material screen’ Now there lies the problem. I am not a medium or a Spiritualist so I have no point to make.
The spectrum of light extends from the ultra violet to the infra red. Either side of our visual sight it goes on into infinity.
We see only the tiniest part of this spectrum. When you switch on the TV you know the radio waves are there, but you can’t see them. But you have no doubts because it works. So why do we doubt that other dimensions exist? Because we can’t see them they are not there? We are so brainwashed to believe in materialism that all else is so often dismissed as unreal.
This is not about religion. A belief in any sort of afterlife varies from one religion to another. I prefer to deal in facts.
The ‘other dimension’ to which I refer most of us have no access to. Because we have closed our minds, shut the door so that no new ideas may enter, we have lost the ability to see beyond the so called normal.
So many on this site have had experiences that seem unexplained. People don’t relate them to others for fear of being thought weird. That should never be so especially on this site.
It’s not so much about bringing comfort, although it may help, but realising that all the evidence, if we care to look, points to death not being the end but a new beginning. What form we take then I have no idea. But no matter how and when we die our ‘essence’ goes on down that long road.
It would be interesting to hear how many of us have had experiences of the Spiritual world. I am not psychic in any way, but my dear wife was, but suppressed telling anyone when she was a child because they made fun of her. As an adult she only told those who would understand. She saw so called dead people alive and well. It never bothered her because, to her, it was a normal way of seeing. This gift of seeing what is true reality is given to many, who reject it because they think they are going crazy. That’s sad! We should not go looking for psychic reactions, It has to be spontaneous and when least expected, because as soon as our minds begin to work on it and want it again, it’s lost.
Take care everyone. John.
John, I do believe, the other morning I was half asleep and having an awful nightmare, my husband passed away after a battle with pancreatic cancer on 4 June. I was dreaming how he had gone missing and I was trying to find him, when I felt someone hold my hand, it shocked me and I pulled away! That same afternoon my son came to visit and he too experienced something, he said he felt someone put their arm around his shoulders. I’m convinced my husband paid us these visits. Funnily enough he never believed in this. It was comforting though.
Hi. Margarita. Now that’s exactly what I was taking about. That was a truly meaningful experience for you and your son. Disbelieving has little to do with it, It often happens that total disbelievers can get a shock when it happens. You were trying to find him in your dream and he responded. Don’t be scared of what happens, nothing can ever harm you. Thanks for your reply. Take care. John.
It really did comfort me because I have always loved his hands, it just caught me unawares thats why I jumped! He probably laughed because he never believed.
I do believe but am very disappointed my husband has not made himself known perhaps its too soon he died 29th May after a long battle with cancer.
I had the same experience when I lost my dad. Fell asleep on the sofa one night and felt someone hold my hand. It was so real and I felt so calm. It was like him saying you’ll be okay.
3 days after my JD passed I woke up in the night convinced he was behind me holding me close. I was tingling all over and shivery but also really calm. I thought I was dreaming at first. I had an urge to say his name out loud and to ask if it was him I could sense. It was over very quickly, probably after 20 seconds or so, but i know I didn’t imagine it. I certainly believe. And I didn’t before this and used to write it all off as crazy talk. I am keen to hear other people’s experiences x
Oh how comforting for you, yes there is more in this world that we know nothing about. TKe care xx
My Gerry died in his sleep on 25th May and I found out the next day (scan results) that he had cancer of the oesophagus. He had discomfort rather than pain and thought he had an ulcer and that his weight loss was due to stopping drinking to heal a wound due to another health condition. I believe that he has been sending me signs, too numerous to mention so I will just tell you about two. I love what others may regard as tacky, kitsch ornaments! A couple of years ago he bought me two little black swans: I did not know that black swans existed. The two days before he died I kept looking at them, over and over. The morning after he died, two black swans appeared on the local marine lake. I went looking for them every day. Each time I went they were not there, until the morning of his funeral. I have woken up this morning to see that another ornament has turned so it is facing the wrong way. As soon as I saw this topic I had to reply! He knows that I have always said I think I would be scared if I saw a ghost, so I believe this is his alternative way. I have kept a list. Take care everybody and if you find things comforting please look out for them.
Janet you are so fortunate that your Husband is connecting to you. My Husband died of the same cancer on 29th May and I am desperate for him to send me a sign that he is alright.
Hi. Marie. Don’t be desperate for a sign, All the time you are looking for something to happen you block any chance of it doing so.
Web need to as calm as we can. This is why it so often happens in dreams when we are relaxed in sleep, Our conscious mind is in abeyance and the unconscious comes into play. If any contact is to made it will be through the unconscious because our conscious minds are full of emotions and all sorts of other thoughts. I believe genuine mediums are able, while conscious, to tap into the unconscious. They see beyond what we call ‘reality’ to another place and dimension.
Give yourself space and time. You are still loved and that love will show through in some way.
Hi. Janet. Now that bears out what I have said. It’s all about what Jung called ‘synchronicity’, meaningful coincidences. There is no ‘chance’ in any of it. Black swans are very rare, and they can be symbols of something very precious and different. I have no doubt that you are having signs of your loved one’s presence.
The big problem in all this is disbelief. Now I am not suggesting everyone has to believe. We all have our own opinions about the validity of an afterlife. I only suggest we keep an open mind.
I have no idea what Heaven is or what it’s like. I doubt the human mind could gasp the enormity of it, but when so called strange things happen what other explanation is there?
We are talking about something so profound and deep that words become inadequate. It comes down to indescribable feelings. Take care, John.
Thank you Jonathan I hope you are right
Hi Cat. ‘Crazy talk’. You can maybe see now why so many have these experiences and write them off as ‘all in the mind’. They don’t talk about them for fear of ridicule or being thought crazy.
You were feeling calm. And that’s when most of these experiences occur. It may be only 20 seconds or so, but the contact is there. There is a line between the conscious mind and the unconscious. We may just momentarily step over the line and come back, but what we see or feel there is not imagination.
Thanks for your post. John.
There is doubt in your mind Marie. Now that’s good because doubt may make you explore further. You can’t, at the moment, believe because you have not had any experiences. It may surprise you to know neither have I. For some reason my wife has not given me any signs, but I do know there may be a reason. It has not stopped me believing because so many have such experiences. As we get older we get into a mindset. We tend to reject new ideas because they clash with our firmly held beliefs, which if recognised as being invalid, would upset our mental balance. So we shut our minds for fear of being hurt, and in doings so cut off any experiences that may help. An open mind is a great asset. Take care.
You accept the possibility that there is more than what we see with our limited five senses. Not believing in a God or a heaven is irrelevant. Beliefs are so often just ideas handed down from parents, teachers or someone in authority in our lives.
I have no idea if there is a God or not or a heaven or not, but what we are talking about takes us out of the accepted realm of religious belief, into a virtually unknown place.
‘A bond between souls cannot be broken no matter what the distance’. So right! If it’s real love then nothing on earth can ever break that bond. We perhaps need to think in unworldly terms. None of what goes on here on earth has any relevance to that other dimension which I have talked about. You believe it is possible because you have experienced it. Best wishes. John.
@jonathan123 I think you know the story of the owl and since it happened I do believe it was my John sending me the sign I craved. Since then someone said to me whenever a thought or memory comes unbidden into your mind know it is from them. Not the memories you are thinking yourself as we all are in our grief. The ones that just pop up seemingly at random. Since then I have let my mind be still and calm and hundreds of memories, ideas, thoughts and love come flooding through. He is very near and in some special place waiting for me to join him. I literally can’t wait for that day to be in his arms again and for ever this time.
Yes indeed. It is only in the silence that any meaningful message can come through, or some activity or event can manifest. All the time we are engaged in distracting thoughts it will be difficult.
Grief and associated emotions are abstractions, although it is impossible to stop them. You are indeed blessed if you can calm your mind. When we begin to settle even a bit we can learn to meditate. Meditation calms the mind and it’s then communication may be possible. But in the West we tend to have an urgent need to keep our minds occupied with all sorts of irrelevant nonsense. We try and distract ourselves in any way possible, even when not in grief. How many of us gave serious thought about life and it’s purpose? Pleasure is what it’s all about. Kids are taught ‘if it’s not fun, don’t do it’.
It’s not until we come face to face with reality as in bereavement, that we may begin to think there must be more to it than that.
Be kind to yourself. John.
Definitely so many butterflies behaving in strange ways - flying in the house and in front on the car on the way to the crem. Also my Mum visited me in a dream - it was very light hearted and I knew all was well. I still feel awful but I have a sense she is ok wherever she is
What or who did your wife see? What did they look like? Could she communicate with who she was seeing?
I do wish there was a place to discuss with others who have experiences. I have had many. Some while awake, some while asleep. My grandmother had them too and so does one of my older cousins. I have no control over it. They are not every day occurrences.
Here are two that are not mine, they were told to me by friends who experienced it:
One friend was driving home from work in his deceased parent’s old car that he inherited when they both passed. Out of nowhere, both parents were in the car with him. His dad driving - basically on my friend’s lap. His mom sat in the passenger seat. The mom and dad were talking as normal - but not to him. He said they could not see him. They disappeared when he pulled into his driveway.
A different friend was on her couch with one of her friends. A woman appeared, drinking tea. The woman was my friend’s deceased mom. The mom talked to my friend by way of making a few comments. My friend and her friend both saw the mom and both heard the mom. They were too stunned to respond to the mom. Then she disappeared.