It’s been seven weeks since my mum suddenly passed away. She was early 60s so it was a bit of a shock. I can’t see how life can be good again without her. People say it gets easier. But I feel I’m struggling more and more as each day passes.
I feel that people think you should be ‘back to normal’ by now but they don’t understand the pain.
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Hello… seven weeks is no time at all to adjust to such a significant loss. Don’t feel any pressure from people around you as your grief will be with you forever. It might change as time goes by but there will be ups and downs along the way. I’m nearly 4 months on from losing my Mum and still feel in a dense fog of sadness. Everyone around me has stopped asking how I am, but I think that’s just human nature as people shy away from potentially awkward conversations! Be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to grieve properly…xxx
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Thank you for your kind reply. It’s really hard. People have stopped asking me too. Trying to focus on positive memories to get through it but it’s hard.
I hope you’re coping as well as you can.
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I’m so sorry to hear this. I know exactly how you feel, I lost my mum 7 weeks ago too and I feel worse than ever. It seems, the longer is since I’ve seen her, the worse it is and I just can’t accept that she’s gone.
You’re right about other people’s reactions too, everyone seems to think I should be well ‘over it’ by now and that I should be carrying on as normal, even my own brother! I’m getting to the point where I don’t want to say how I’m feeling to anyone for fear of them rolling their eyes or just dismissing me.
I think nobody can understand unless they’ve been in this position themselves and so called friends seem to be avoiding me like the plague! I know it’s hard for them to know what to say or do, but the odd text wouldn’t go amiss!
Sending you a big hug, at least there are some fab people on this site who truly understand what we are going through x
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I feel worse than ever too. Today has been a bad day. Awful.
Friends are avoiding me too unless they’ve been through it themselves. No one understands.
I’m so sorry that you’re on this journey too. Thank you for your message. Look after yourself. And you’re right. This site is so helpful
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I lost my mum at the beginning of April and I feel like it’s only just now starting to hit home. Previously I felt like she’s just been away on holiday or that I just haven’t been to see her but It’s really now starting to sink in that I’ll never be able to see her again, hear her voice of ask her for help. My safety net has gone. I’ve got a very small family as well and mum passing has made me scared that before long I will be the only one left and I’m only 40. It doesn’t bear thinking about 
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So sorry to hear you are struggling too. It’s a horrible journey and I’m finding it more and more difficult as the days go on.
I’m 40 too - far too young to lose our lovely mums. I hope you’re looking after yourself.
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It’s now you will find out who your friends are. Who loves you enough to care about how you are and what’s going on with you, really, behind the front we get so good at putting on. Who will put up with how you are and still be there this time next year.
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You’re so right. 
good friends are precious
I’m sorry you feel this way, I feel the same, still expecting my mum to come back any minute and make everything alright again, like she always did.
You’re right, 40 is very young to lose your mum, I am 45 and also think I’m too young. I’m so envious of everyone else my age and older who all seem to still have their mums and I’m left wondering what I’ve done wrong to deserve this. I know life doesn’t work like that, but I can’t help the way I feel.
True friends are hard to come by and I would like to hope that, after losing my mum and also my dad a couple of years ago, that I would be able to support someone else in the same position in future.
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I know what you mean Lucy. I feel in denial quite a bit and then have pure panic when reality hits.
It’s the worst feeling.
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I totally understand how you feel. For me the nights and the mornings are the worst. I lived with my mum
and going downstairs in the mornings and her not being there is horrific. I do wonder whether it will ever feel any different.
Please do keep posting if you ever feel like talking or ranting, I’m always here.
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Hi I no how you feel. I lost my dad December and I think it’s getting worst. Miss him loads
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So sorry to hear this, it’s horrible isn’t it. I find this site a lifeline though, chatting to others in similar positions is a real comfort x
Ah that awful feeling when you first open your eyes on a morning and remember. God it’s the worst. Makes me feel sick to the stomach 
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That’s exactly it, it’s just so painful isn’t it x
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Thank you all for your kind replies. And I’m
Sorry that we are all here for the same reason.
You’re right about the first seconds you wake up and then you remember. I was up at 330 this morning panicking that mum had gone.
I take great comfort in this site so thank you
And likewise , we’re all here if anyone needs to talk. Here’s to a more positive day
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Oh my heart goes out to you and everone in this community, this is exactly how i feel too…it hurts so much yet you take the time to support me and others 
your mum will be proud of her kind daughter
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Hi
It gets worse at first because the more time passes the longer you haven’t seen her, I’m the same mum died in January she was 75 & it was a shock, I miss her & think about her every single day, Eventually time will make it a little easier we will think of our happy memories instead of being raw grief all the time, I know because I lost my lovely dad in 2020 & it was just getting better for me & then I lost my mum & it’s started all over again, but I know we will be ok, we just need to heal
Talk & cry whenever you need to !
I totally understand what you say about other people they think 3 months & you’re totally fine! These people haven’t ever experienced raw grief & unfortunately this is the price of deep love
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I’m so sorry you feel this way too. I agree with everything you’ve said. My story is quite similar to yours. My mum was 77 and passed on 27th March this year, having been diagnosed less than 4 weeks beforehand. I think that, with every passing day, the feeling of missing her gets worse. I think I’m still in disbelief that she’s actually gone.
My dad passed in January 2021 and I too was just beginning to process what had happened when my mum became ill. I couldn’t believe that I was having to go through it all again, especially so soon after my dad.
You’re right, we need to take time to grieve and cry when we need to. Unfortunately a lot of people seem to think we can just flick a switch and get over it, but those who know how it feels realise that it will take an awful long time before we feel normal again. That’s why this site is so important and I think talking to others who are also grieving is so supportive and comforting.
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