Am I just being weird or does anyone think it’s OK to still celebrate our wedding anniversary. On April 25th it will be our 24th wedding anniversary and I don’t know if its OK to still celebrate it. I was going to still get Jim a card and flowers and put them on grave but I don’t know if this sounds a bit weird. I always dreamed of celebrating our 25th which would have been next year. Some people have said I’m not married anymore so how can you celebrate wedding anniversary but I told them we didn’t get divorced or anything Jim died not my choice. I don’t know what to do seems another thing to get through.
12 Likes
I bought myself a little present on our anniversary as I know my husband would have. Do what ever helps you get through the day.
6 Likes
Thank you Sharon and Tillwemeetagain. I think I will do it as you say sod what another people think he’s my husband not there’s. A week after our anniversary will be my 60th birthday . Its going to be a hard couple of weeks. Two more firsts to get though.
4 Likes
Absolutely get Jim a card and flowers for the grave.
It doesn’t sound weird at all.
He was your husband and you’re still his wife.
I wouldn’t bother sharing anything with the people who have said you’re not married any more.
We need to get through however we can, do exactly what you want Misprint.
Take care
Janey xx
3 Likes
Thank you Janey for your kind words xx
1 Like
I would do it misprint. It is not weird.
I am going to buy a card and flowers for my wife on her birthday in 3 weeks time and l will also do the same for our wedding anniversary in July. I don’t care what other people think. As far as l am concerned l am married. I did it for valentines day.
If you want to do it, do it sod everybody else. I k ow it will bring me comfort.
Take care x
5 Likes
@Misprint hi misprint I think you should celebrate it . It’s the anniversary of your beautiful and wonder marriage with your Jim who loved and adored you as you do him.I was 13 when my mum died and I visited her grave so many times a week and for years every mothers day I would put a card and flowers on her grave. So believe me it’s not weird. They may be gone but they will always be loved and never forgotten. You do what feels right for you. Take care my friend sending hugs x
3 Likes
Hi
I would definitely celebrate your wedding anniversary if that is what you want to do. I actually filled in a form the other day saying I was married as that is how I still see myself.
Since Ian passed away over 40 weeks now, I’ve texted him every morning and night telling him how I’m feeling and what I’ve been up to. I just ignore it when people tell me I shouldn’t be doing it or it’s not healthy. I do it because I want to and it brings me some comfort at a time when I’m just getting through each day as best I can.
A card and flowers sounds a lovely idea and don’t let other people stop you.
Take care,
Julie x
4 Likes
Hi misprint
Yes you should mark your special day somehow. It was our anniversary in January and I opened a bottle of Prosecco and had a few glasses as that is what we would have done.
Do what you feel like doing and don’t worry about other people.
Xx
2 Likes
Hi Misprint it is still your special day and Jim is still your husband. Celebrate and remember those special times you had together. It will be our 1st wedding anniversary on 23rd April (we had been together for 27 years) but sadly we were only officially husband and wife for 17 days. I am planning to go away for a few days - a belated honeymoon. Take care
3 Likes
Hello, I think you should definitely celebrate, Misprint as you are celebrating the love you shared and the joy you had together. This celebration is important - so flowers, a card and a toast to him and you, in love that day and every day. Take care, my friend.
2 Likes
I would celebrate all the days that are important to you Misprint.
Reading your post has given me the courage to do likewise. When my husband died I wanted to mark his birthday in some way but was made to feel it would be inappropriate in some way and I lived through all those days alone and crying.
I still think about the special days in the life we had together so I will certainly mark them in some way in the future.
Thank you for posting this, you and everyone else here have made me feel so much better about this. 
5 Likes
I lost my husband after 40 years together in February this year. It is our wedding anniversary in May and I will celebrate it. Just because he isn’t physically here doesn’t mean I am no longer married to him, I feel him with me and I couldn’t bear the thought of not celebrating, in some way, our marriage and years together . Those years will never be forgotten. I understand some people may think it odd and that he is gone, but he lives on in my heart. Do whatever feels right for you, everyone is different. Years ago my mother started keeping cards from my Dad in case he wasn’t there one day. After he died she would get out a card for each special day through the year and have it on the side. she was a widow for 20 years and for all those years would get the appropriate card out. I started doing the same a couple of years ago, so I have a card for the special occasions from last year that he gave me and I will get those out on the special days. It is so very difficult losing someone you love, which I never realised until now, so you must do what you feel is best for you. Big hugs.
5 Likes
Celebrate, rejoice, honour your loved ones. Shell and me never got married ( together 20 years) .I n the months up to her passing, , she asked should we get married, I said it wasn’t important, it wouldn’t change anything, I wonder now, did she feel her time was coming, she apologied, for being ill , making my life unpleasant, I obvious, said don’t be daft. I maybe wish now , we had got married, but it would not have changed any thing.
Take care all x
4 Likes
It really bugs me when people say I’m not married anymore, I am and always will be, so misprint celebrate your anniversary as you are still married, your other half might not be with you physically but he’s with you in your heart forever and he’ll be smiling down on you. 
X
6 Likes
Thanks to everyone for your kind words. Only people who have suffered from loss understand. I was in card shop today getting Jim an anniversary card and saw someone I know she said why I’m I getting a card for Jim and I need to except he’s gone and get on with it. It upset me so much I told her I will do what I want and to mind her own business I don’t expect I’m on her xmas card list anymore but I wish people could just understand how I feel.
3 Likes
Hello
How dare that woman presume to question your actions! I feel so angry for you and it’s no wonder you felt so upset. Until you are in our situation you can never know how it feels or how you will react. Your reply was exactly what was needed but you shouldn’t have been put in the situation in the first place and I’m so sorry you were.
Look after yourself and take no notice of what other people say or do,
X Julie
3 Likes
Well said, I whole heartedly agree. I hope you’re ok Misprint. Hugs.
3 Likes
I’m ok been crying every since I’m so angry that someone should even speak like that to me
3 Likes
People really don’t understand do they, do whatever you feel is right for you, . Sending hugs and respect, xx
3 Likes