I lost my husband just over two months ago and I am totally heartbroken. He was my world and we had a very happy marriage. I am so lost without him, I cannot sleep or eat and I feel permanently sick and tearful. If I died tomorrow I wouldn’t care. Will I ever feel better again ?
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So sorry for your loss. I know how you feel, I lost my husband 6 weeks ago and feel the same. It does help to read the posts on this site as it makes you realise that we all feel the same way and you 
are not alone. Sending you hugs.
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For me, it is taking a long time. I have good days and bad days, no enthusiasm for anything. My thoughts are with you, take care
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Thats exactly how i am good days and bad days 
today is a bad day … feeling sad , feeling lost, wishing he was here to protect me like he always did … @Heartbroken9 youre at the very early stages of grief and i remember those days and its so hard and all you can do is keep looking after yourself and being as kind to yourself as you can - self care xxx
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Exactly that
Up snd down like a yo yo. On a continuous rollercoaster. No 2 days the same. No 2 hours the same. The only thing I want is the one thing I can never have.
Now we’ve got to try and make a new life. Not the one we wanted but the one we’ve been dumped with. People keep saying it will get better. But when?
Big hugs to everyone
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I lost my husband 10 weeks ago.
Some of the things I have experienced …
Lack of appetite and not even thinking about mealtimes or whether I have eaten or should eat
Sometimes I forget to drink even when I’ve made a mug of tea.
I have started making flasks of tea as it means I can make a lot of tea at once
that stays hot.
Can’t think straight. Lack of concentration.
One example, shopping can be just wandering around a shop trying to remember what I need.
Thinking I must tell him something I’ve heard or seen.
Rollercoaster of emotions. Unexpected, unpredictable.
Even though I’ve had experienced lows, they still take me surprise especially if I’ve had an ok day.
Hopelessness, what’s the point. Also WHY??
Loneliness. Wishing he was still here not only for comfort and company but so that he could enjoy things, have good times.
Waking up and not knowing if I will feel sad or more positive.
Having positive times. Looking at flowers or birds and enjoying seeing them.
Then wishing he was here to see it.
Having OK times. I can get things done. Sometimes I have had to have a bit of a talk with myself to do something.
Like moods, my appetite fluctuates. The other day I actually felt hungry and I knew what I wanted to eat (that really surprised me).
Some days surprising myself by tackling something my husband would have done.
I am definitely on a steep learning curve with some things!
Looking after our cats has kept me busy! One has been giving so many cuddles which has been good for us.
They both were affected, change in behaviour and the vet said the one she saw
was grieving.
I have also found communicating on this site with others who are grieving a great help.
I only know 2 widows. I only knew one for about a month after losing my husband and then a friend died.
I don’t know if that helps. I found I ask myself is it normal to feel this or that.
Sending you all big hugs,
Rose x
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Hi So sad,
I am feeling all those things. My concentration is awful. I have tried joining things but it makes me feel worse, perhaps I am trying to run before I can walk. My heart goes out to you
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My daughter and her boyfriend are abroad this week, so I’ve been cleaning their flat thoroughly, done 4 loads of washing, even cleaned the fridge. Not somethjng I would normally do, but I’ve seen it as a project and it’s keeping me busy. Im definitely not the mother-hen type, they’ll be surprised!
What have I turned into???
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I don’t know hardly any widows around where i live ! Just stupid 30/40 year olds who really dont know anything about life and theyre all so damn arrogant they think it will never happen to them ! Lose the person you love !! X
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All my friends have husbands and a life…im loosing contact with some of them as i have nothing to say because i dont do anything or go any where to talk about…you can only talk about television for a short while…and when they ask what have you been up to the answer is always nothing much
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Make new friends ! Theyre not worth it … dont waste your time on em - its the stupid world we live in … its so fake ! People wanna believe that life is perfect and it so isnt ! Thats just a lie they have told themselves ! X
Wow when Nick first became ill at Christmas, Roly one of our dogs started biting his side and making it bleed.
Nick came home 6th jan… hospital bed in front room and commode.
Roly guarded him all night. He even barked and woke me up one night when Nick tried to get up. Animals definitely know 
Nick went into the home 13th march… i found Roly lying on his bed.
He was so anxious until the bed and commode went.
It was heartbreaking 
Nick passed away 20th April. Rolys fur has grown back and hes calmer… but he still takes his toys up the side of the entry and waits for his dad. I have to bribe him with treats to get him in x
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My concentration is terrible
Cant be bothered with anything… and my memory is terrible 
Im going back to work 3rd june… i cant remember anything.
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It can happen to anyone, but i know what you mean… people walk on the other side to avoid me.
I dont mind… cant be bothered talking about it. Opening wounds
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Yes, yes and yes!
Im going through the same and feel the same as everyone on here.
Its comforting knowing im not the only one xx
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No somebody i not seen for quite a while ( a wally) it was my fault cos i mentioned it … i just cant stand peoples reactions … swear to god i will whack somebody one day ! X
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People are so insensitive 
Its only if they have been through it themselves.
Ive got 1 friend who lost her mum last year and knows how i feel. She never says the wrong thing. I only see her once a week though.
People who have never been through this are more or less saying, pull yourself together! It will get easier in time… blah blah
It wont… because i only wanted to spend time with Nick.
Oh and his Aunty… who i will have to see tomorrow kept saying… dont cry infront of Nick before he passed away… silly woman… we were both crying together. Holding on to eachother
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He went - how long is it since you lost him ? As if to say you should be over it by now ( its 17 months tomorrow btw) so i sharply said back - well we were married 35 years ! I felt like saying - so sod off !!l you 30 something idiot ! Lol xx i would like to meet somebody else but nobody around here apart from a dog walker friend who i like but its not happening and as for going online to date - god not got the confidence for that ! Just have to hope dont i that i meet someone … i want to … i don’t wanna live rest of my life alone Xx
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He passed away 20th April and his funeral is today
Its sunny, so i dont know what to wear! I was going to wear a very smart coat but its wool. Thats the least of my problems.
Nick was my soul mate… it sounds rubbish but i always made the wrong choice with men. He restored my faith.
Unfortunately, we didnt start seeing eachother until we were 42.
54 now… really dont want another man in my life. I know its early days but my ex husband was an alcoholic and put me off.
Please be careful getting into a relationship again. Take your time. You are vulnerable xx
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Thinking of you today
I hope everything goes well
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