Two years without Oldfield, he was the one with the wanderlust, he’d drag me to airports, stuff me in the car for days out. We had a holiday booked in Dorset just after he died, I couldn’t face it alone, and cancelled it. We used to go walking a lot, just the two of us, I’m finding it really hard to work up the energy to go anywhere. I don’t want to go alone, but it seems like nobody I know wants to do those things, none of my friends seem to like a walk, and to be honest I don’t want to do it with complete strangers either. I suppose I’m just going to have to ease myself back in.
I think I’m feeling similar to you , I have been fortunate in life to have got most things I have wanted , never struggled to earn good money , nice house & cars , blessed with having 2 children . I know so many people who have been worse off , brother and his wife couldn’t have kids but so desperately wanted them , friends who struggled moneywise / home wise / job wise etc .
Now though as I have never really struggled with anything , it feels like it’s all been saved up and I have to suffer so much , as the one thing I want more than anything I’ve ever wanted , I can’t have back no matter what I do .
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Thanks @miker hope to speak to you soon … message mr anytime you want cos i know how bloody tough this is ! Xx
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I know you said you are not keen on walking with strangers, but have you a Walking for Health’ group nearby? They are run by The Ramblers, and the groups meet weekly to walk usually 2-3 miles. You would at least meet some new people and after a couple of weeks they would not be strangers. I think U3a also have walking groups, but I dont know much about those. Perhaps your local library could help.
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I’ll investigate, thank you.
I used to go with walking groups before my husband died but since I have lost my fitness but did go on half a walk with our women’s group they ran. Thought was half way better than nothing at all. I have to build up to it gradually and sit down. But it was good.
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We went on a cruise before my husband got ill. Glad we did. Challenge for us was having stress of two lots customs each way as fly and ship.
I am glad we did as he wasn’t fit enough again. I was concerned about getting sea sick so we were advised to book central of the ship which doesn’t feel so bad. So we took that advice. As it was the Adriatic it was calmer.
Also in summer time.
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Yes I took ages to brave going on one of the walks we used to go on. But did and thinking about it was worse than doing it. It was ok. Of course memories of us together all the time but now I just imagine he is still there and chat in my mind. His presence will never go away anyway and why would I want it to? I don’t want him to be forgotten. It was the other way round and I used to want to go out. I am glad I did.
I used to say come on one day might not be able to. Had this routine. Make a date and I would get picnic of ham and cheese sandwich each bit if fruit cake and thermos. Umbrella and plastic bag to sit on in case the seats were wet.
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I am concerned about booking a year ahead. I think I will not be able to definitely at my age.
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I love your can do attitude! 
I can understand that.
Sounds nice - apparently cruise boats are pretty stable x
Thanks, I’ll try ringing them I think (rather than looking online) and see what they say 
Since my husband has died i have had trouble booking things too far ahead so i understand how you feel.
Hi Mike.
I have just read what you wrote. I am so sorry that you’re struggling so much. Don’t be hard on yourself. Please be kind to yourself. Jacky sounds like she was a wonderful person. She is with you. It is a struggle to do things on your own. The day will come when you will be able to do things. If you want to chat anytime please feel free to message me. I’m here for anyone who wants to talk. Take care. Maggie
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Thank you.
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Hi. I lost my husband in February this year and lost without it. I thought I was ok and dealing with his loss but had a complete meltdown at the weekend so much so my sister stayed with me for 3 days. I think his loss just hit home after doing all the financial things one has to do when someone passes. Truly awful. Now I’m thinking my husband would hate the thought of me crying and being unhappy so I’ve booked a solo holiday for next May with Leger holidays and am very much looking forward to it. As the Lady said. Life goes on and a short life it is. Be strong everyone and be kind to yourselves.
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We need to put our holiday places on the chat and who booked with as it may give otjets struggling to try something new an idea of places to visit and who with. I went with Shearings to Bavaria in May and am looking at possibly leger for next year as the coaches are much more comfortable.
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Where are you going im looking at italy or france for 2025 with Leger solo holidays.
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