Sue Ryder calls for 'bereavement support bubbles'

With new local lockdown measures announced this week, Sue Ryder is repeating its call for bereaved households to be allowed to form ‘bereavement support bubbles’ with another household https://www.sueryder.org/news/bereaved-people-claim-lockdown-deaths-became-just-a-statistic.

We are calling on the government to extend the support bubble policy to include bereaved people with more than one adult in the household, for example housemates and older children. This would allow bereaved people to form a support bubble with another household without the need for social distancing.

We believe that a bereavement support bubble would help people to feel less isolated and alone by creating a support network.

What do you think of this idea? Would a bereavement support bubble make a difference to you?

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Yes think it would be great for moral and mental reasons, you are so alone after bereavement.
Wish us luck and thank the team who are asking for this.

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Excellent Priscilla, this was just picked up in one of the topics last night, perhaps you could reply (copy) in.

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Topic is ‘Death of my husband’

Great idea. Although my husband died long before Covid I felt terribly isolated because I had no support (no children, no family). Come to think of it I could have used a support bubble at the time. Keep working for this. Surely if the government have any humanity they should support it.

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Good idea, thanks for flagging this one, I’ll go and post now.

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Yes a bereavement support bubble would certainly benefit me and I’m sure a lot of others who are all of a sudden living alone. When you are grieving and coming to terms with the loss of a loved one , having to make changes to you life you need the support of family and friends to help you through these very tough times . This site has been a huge comfort to me and I’m so glad I came across it but we also need that interaction with others and need to visit or be visited .

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Having lost my husband two weeks before the first lock down I know like so many others how being isolated off from others made things feel a million times worst …yes using social media to keep in touch was an option but nothing can replace the connections of face to face contact …I fully support the notion of a bereavment bubble during the next lockdown heading our way .

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Yes
This is a great idea
And you would feel less isolated and alone x

I was sooooo happy to have finally succeeded at the second attempt at a funeral for my beloved husband a week ago today ( 15 October 2020 ). The first attempt; which will forever be known as the dress rehearsal, was cancelled only 50 minutes before the start of the ceremony as the crematorium was a blaze !

Imagine my horror yesterday, getting a message telling me that I need to self-isolate, after 7 days of mixing with Tom, Dick and Harry as I have been subconsciously avoiding sitting in the house with the empty chair et al. I haven’t been able to start my grief process yet, because of the hassle associated with the funeral(s) so to now have to face it H-E-A-D O-N when I do not feel quite ready, all on my own, without being even able to go for a walk, or invite someone in for company is mortifying to say the least.

I am more than happy to do my part to protect others but it is ridiculous to not make tests available for those who are told to self-isolate, unless they have symptoms; effectively forcing the bereaved into further trauma, at a time when they need understanding, compassion and support.

It is a B-I-G Y-E-S to the Bereavement Bubble from me x

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I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve lost your husband, and that the funeral was postponed due to a fire at the crematorium - it must have been a shock to get this news at the last minute when you would have been doing your best to mentally prepare for the event. It sounds as though it is a relief to have now been able to hold the ceremony.

I’m sorry also to hear that you now need to self-isolate and are not eligible for a test. That is just an added blow after everything else, and at a time when you are really in need of support.

I see that you are new to this Online Community, and I hope that it can help you a little to get through this period of isolation, and any other times when you might need it. You aren’t alone in your grief - there are many supportive users here who have also lost their husband or wife and will understand some of what you are going through. When you feel ready, you might find it helpful to start a new conversation in the Losing a Partner category, and share your story there - you should then get lots of supportive replies.

How to start a new conversation.

Thank you very much for such a supportive message Priscilla, it is much appreciated.

I am looking forward to getting to know other members and to readIng their posts.

Sally

Yes it would.Because although I have a family bubble I would love tobe able to go into my neighbour. We are company for one another and it helps me to feel less lonely?

Hi Sally.My name is Jeanette and I lost my husband in April 2019 he was 67 and we had just past our 40th wedding anniversary the previous July. The first time we had lockdown my son was with me but now it’s just me and my cat.I do have a family support bubble but at times I do feel lonely because I miss my husband terribly. :frowning:I’ve got to say that coming on here and chatting to people in the same position is a great comfort. Take care.

Thank you very much for introducing yourself Jeanette, that is very kind of you. I am very sorry to learn of the loss of your husband and the additional challenges that lockdown has created.

I lost my husband ( who was 62 ) 6 weeks ago today on 13 September 2020, after 19 years together and it has been a very distressing time because of COVID barriers and restrictions, making everything more difficult to access because people are working from home / organisations are not being staffed in the same way.

I was very lucky in that I was able to support my husband’s wish to be at home, rather than hospital and we were together (albeit not in the same room) when he died . . . I thank my lucky stars that we were able to have that time together and get the closure ( if that is the right word ) that is denied to so many. In the words of his favourite film, he was ‘quite ready’ and by the time the second funeral came around, I was quite ready ( or at least as ready as I would ever be ) to let him go.

Life feels very strange and as if I am in a parallel universe, as I know he has gone but I haven’t really had time to start my grief process, because of all of the issues around the funeral and also because he had been so poorly and in bed ( in a separate room ) for almost a fortnight. I suppose ( luckily again ), I had started to get used to being alone; hence why I feel in a parallel universe, as I had been used to living sort of separately but regularly went in to whichever room he was in ( he kept flitting between two bedrooms in an attempt to get comfortable ).

Like you, I am so pleased to have found a community of people going through the same things, to help and support each other as only the ( newly ) bereaved can really understand what the bereaved are going through as time, dilutes the memory.

I am looking forward to supporting others, as much as being supported, once I have navigated my way through my own T-R-E-A-C-L-E of G-R-I-E-F, as that is the best way that I know to cope.

You take care too x

Good to hear you were able tobe together at the end.
My husband was sadly in a coma when he passed so it was peaceful for him. You go through so many thoughts and emotions. And I still have a good cry now and again.Then give myself a talking to and just get on with it. I have so many happy memories tho and you have to hang on to that.Its precious.Plus my 2 wonderful son’s are the image of him. We are in this together and are here for one another. Keep safe.x

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