It’s such a struggle. Every single day. Sending you a big hug. 
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6 months for me next Thursday and I can totally relate. This road is so extremely difficult. I never would have thought I’d be travelling along it at 48 
my hubby went to work and never came home.
Love and hugs
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Yes definitely in survival mode. I have a very small window if tolerance and quickly get annoyed over little things.
Not sure about taking medication for anxiety? Xx
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I’m on medication for depression / anxiety
It is helping a little🤷🏼♀️
I’m not ashamed to admit that I need meds to get me thru…
We are all different I guess🙌🏻
I don’t think I’ll be right until I have a companion tbh….not used to being alone & love sharing stuff with a like minded partner 
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Hiw long is it thefurkids since uou lost your partner. I also take antidepressants and have done for lots of years due to agrophobia and panic attacks xxx
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My husband died July 3rd 2023
I’ve been on & off various meds since then
Have resorted to buying benzos off the internet as I just can’t sleep.
At my worst, I’ve been awake for 72 hours…
Take the dogs to the park for a walk & I’m in La La land…….could literally fall asleep on a bench🤷🏼♀️
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Just be careful what you get of the Internet, make sure its safe, how old is everyone i am 59. But most days recently feel like 109. Xxxx
I’m a nurse…
I know what’s legit & what isn’t👍🏻
Thats good then just wanted to make sure you were safe. Xxx
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It is 6 months next week since Iost my wonderful funny, kind husband after 44 years together. I nursed him through the last 8 years with his younger onset dementia and although he lost the ability to verbally communicate he never lost his personality and a smile and a wink for me. I never seem to be able to go 5 minutes without thinking about him. The only way I cope is by imagining he is physically attached to me in some way so we are still a couple in my mind. I talk to him while I’m doing routine stuff about the house etc. I talk to his photos too. I thought this was little bit strange until I read about the “continuing bonds” concept in bereavement which explained a lot about it. While losing him physically eventually a psychological bond develops to help compensate. I’m hoping this idea might ease the pain eventually although it hasn’t yet. Thinking of you all, it does help to know I’m not alone with this intense relentless feeling of loss.
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I’ve done illicit drugs in my lifetime🤣
But now more sensible as an early 50’s woman
I know all the brands / packaging etc
So know it’s cool… if it helps me chill / sleep then I’m not complaining🤷🏼♀️
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@roni52 survival mode is the brain trying to ensure we’re OK and I don’t know the answer especially reading on posts, there’s a lot of us grieving and in pain. Although I’m posting on here my loss is my Mum who I had such a special relationship and bond with.
@Rainbow11
I was doing quite well…
Then I got really hurt by someone🤷🏼♀️
And yesterday was the anniversary of my husband’s funeral
So it’s been a tough few days
But I’m resilient and will plough on
I’ve got solo holidays booked in November & December
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Couldnt agree more with these words x
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OMG so relevant and its just me. I’m nearly 11 months now and seem to be going backwards even though i really try to do all the right things. What bugs me most is that nobody mentions him now, i talk to him every day and still miss him desperately. I just don’t know how i will ever live without him
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I admire you strength, I’m strong and everyone thinks I’m doing so well but i just hate my life. I’m contemplating a solo holiday but am holding back.
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@Ruby46
I went to Las Vegas for Xmas / New year on my own. Initially, got to my hotel room & cried!!
But actually, I did enjoy my time away. I knew my husband would’ve been proud of me.
I flew BA Club World which made a difference.
We all do things in our own time…. There is no right or wrong when it comes to grief🤷🏼♀️
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Yes, 17 months on and still feel like every one of these.
Not 12 months yea I’m existing from day to day, not much more. Not having much fun with life.at the moment. If my life ended tomorrow don’t think I would care to be honest. What will be, will be!