I’m just sitting here with the television on and WHAM, again, it just hits me like a sledge hammer … I’m on my own! I think to myself this can’t be real … but it is. Oh how I miss him.X
Ditto! @Loobyloo2 I felt this when my friend left mine hour ago. Made worse by the fact she’s driving back home to be with a partner she doesn’t love and whinges about constantly (don’t get me wrong my friend is lovely and very supportive of me). It just feels so unfair as I’d love to be able to come home to the Love of my Life still. At least when I’m home alone I feel he’s here with me. Sending kind thoughts x
Yes I too feel so alone this evening. My sister stayed last night and when she was leaving I wasn’t crying. A big step forward I thought because when anybody leaves my house I cry! But not much later the realisation of being on my own hit me
I guess the sombre mood of the country is just exacerbating our own grief. I feel hopeless and useless. Just really hate my life.
Kind thoughts to everyone x
I feel same as you all says it all Saturday night and we find ourselves on this forum just to have others to talk to and understand the pain and loneliness it is so hard kissing the live off our life and now find we have to make a new life alone that we don’t want I miss my husband more and more people say it will get better I know it will not been 16 months now miss him so much as you all do what a hard journey we all find ourselves on
Sending you hug xx
Bless you . No words can be said to make it better we all just have to sit with it. Grief is a tough road to walk and at the majority of the time it’s on our own. But they are still with us in our hearts and minds and walk alongside us quiding us over each hurdle. Grief is in reality the price we pay for loving and being loved in return . Take care xxx
All of us on here understand how u feel,
its the disbelieve, & getting use 2 them not being here. It is just so heartbreaking. & lonely.
It’s tough. I have a part time job in an art gallery that gets me out of the house and talking to people, but it’s when I’m in by myself and the TV is on that I feel it the most. I never used to watch TV, (I spent most of my working life employed by the BBC, so I’ve had enough telly for a lifetime, or so I thought), but now I do. The odd thing is, I’m staying up later than I normally do because I hate the silence when the television goes off. I think I’m getting more used to being on my own, but it’s hard to tell, I’ve nothing to measure it against. I can only hope it gets better for you, @Loobyloo2 as I hope it gets better for all of us.
Hi , Sundays seem to last forever . I still can’t watch telly . Almost a year on . I’ve tried to read . But find I’m reading the same page over and over and not sinking in . Radio full of sad songs . Can’t motivate myself to do any house work . I’m sitting scrolling through this site .and watching the minutes tick by . Slowly . I’m not alone in the house . Son and girlfriend in . But I guess I’m not good company . And don’t really want to have to sit and act like I’m ok . I am lonely for my husband . If he was here now .well it would be tomorrow already . The time would go so quick . Is this my life / exsistence now . I know I’m the only one who can change it . But I can’t . Xtake carex
I know that feeling so well, my husband has been gone 5 year 4th Dec & it took me 2 years 2 pull my self together, I visited his grave most days then dident want 2 go home. & I tht is this it just an existence.
I joined a bereavement group after 6 month’s, but I diden’t like having 2 tell 11 strangers my problems. & some 1 asked me1 day, are u lonely & I said no I’m not. Then I realised I was very lonely but only for my husband. Then a year ago i put my flat on the market, with a well know estate agent. It got 4 stars but didn’t sell & all i got was a massive bill for nothing. How I wish my husband was here. So u are not alone in your sadness.
But things are so much harder on your own.
Take care. X
Hi . So sorry you still feel so lonely for your husband . I think we always will . When you have had the best love and affection from your partner and a happy life with them . How can we ever not feel lonely without them . And just want them back . And the happy life we had . I know I am ( lucky) to still have people living here with me and also I have work . But sometimes putting on an act with them is so hard . I don’t need them to have my grief as well as there own . And the one thing I can do for my husband is for our kids to have a happy life like we did . Most time it’s like we all have bedsits . We all stay in our bedrooms . But share the kitchen and bathroom .Also sorry about the problem trying to sell your flat . That must of been so stressful for you .and you would of really needed your husband . But we need our husbands every day as well . Thank you for your reply . Xtake carex
Thank you for your kind reply, you have make me laugh when u said its like u all have Yr own bedsits. If I dident see people on the street, I would think i was on a desert island.
I have a very good Friend of 46 years, & she lost her husband 16 years ago & she’s never really got over it. So when we meet up we do make each other laugh but she says the same its the loneliness she can’t stand. But it’s something we have 2 try & learn 2 live with. But it’s not easy. I do hope in time u feel better. & I’m so gald I found sue ryder its good 2 really people letters.
Take care x
I am the same the weekends are the worst as most of my family and friends are busy with their own lives so don’t get a lot of visitors at the weekends, it makes the weekend drag out so much. I can’t watch TV either even though it’s been 19 months since I lossed Steve, I did put music on for a bit but like you said too many sad songs, so I sit hear in silence too, which I know gives me too much time to think. My sister can’t understand why I don’t watch TV but I can’t explain how it makes me feel. I just started looking after my grandson a few days a week which helps a little but it’s upsetting knowing Steve never got to meet him. I think most of us feel we are just existing, hopefully that will change one day let’s hope anyway. Take care x
Hi . I think I’m starting to prefer my own company . I am so lonely . But only lonely for my husband . We would love to just sit and watch telly on a night after both being at work . And would always find something to laugh about . I always asked stupid questions . What he would find funny , most of the time . He always said I think out of the box . When I have my grandsons , it’s so upsetting thinking that husband will never see them grow up . One is nine and his grandar was his best friend and the other was nearly two when his grandar died . He is turning into a funny little character and his grandar is missing out on so much . It’s so hard for all of us just trying to keep on keeping on . Each sad and lonely day . Xtake carex
Well everytime u look @ yr grandsons, think of the lovely times u both had together I’m sure Yr husband would want that for u. & it is unbearable the loneliness. But that’s the price of the love we had. Take care x
Hi . Thank you for that . And yes some people go through life never experiencing the special love we have had . And still have for our partners . I am so grateful that my husband and I found each other . At 16 year old . And had a lot of happy years together . I just wanted more . But don’t we all . Sending hug . Xtake carex
I met the love of my life when I met Oliver, & we had 30 fantastic years together, & great laughs.
But I wasn’t fortunate enough 2 have children, but he 4 children from his previous marriage, & they r lovely 2 me still, after nearly 5 year of Oliver dying. X
That’s lovely that his kids are lovely to you. You here of so much hurt . You must be a special nice person and made their dad extremely happy . Xtake carex
Ahh thank u, uv made my day. & u & Yr husband must have made Yr grandsons very happy & laugh alot. X
It’s just such an awful nightmare to be living. I’m finding I’m now sleeping the day away. Today was the worst, woke up at 4.30am, made some tea and slept until 7pm… I’d much rather be asleep than face each awful day…. Plus I dream about my Martin…. Sending love to you all… x❤️
Hi dottie, my heart is breaking for u. U r in the middle of a nitemare.
Was Martin ill, ? Or taken suddenly.
U r not alone on here. Talk any time u want. X