The hardest thing

The hardest thing is not talking to someone you used to talk to everyday.


You are so so right … it’s the worst

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It’s only been a short while for me, but I won’t ever stop missing him.
I talk to him, call him, shout at him. The pain just wont go or is it getting any easier…


Been 4 months since I lost my girl and do the same as you , I talk to her aloud a lot of the time , dunno if it’s healthy or not but i do it all the same , never know one day I may get an answer back … keep fighting

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Oh, how we wish we could. Just to hear those three little words “I Love You” again.
Just looked out of the window and was talking to him again and telling him off. I hope he can hear me.

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It’s so hard no matter how long ago we lost our loved ones, the pain is the sameand it doesn’t get any easier with time.

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Its just over 6 months for me. As devastated today as I was on the day he died, perhaps even worse. Just miss him so much. Wedding anniversary in two weeks time and cannot bear to think no cards with our hidden messages ever again.

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Hello Sheila26

Sorry for your loss. 6 months is still a short time for you, and the pain and suffering doesn’t ease.
For me it’s nearly 4 weeks since I lost the love of my life and the pain just gets worse. Everything I do, anywhere I go he’s on my mind. Silly things like ironing his t-shirts, I wish I was still doing them for him.
I just long for the day when I can smile instead of cry thinking about him.
The loneliness is worse at night, trying to sleep but you can’t, just laying there thinking I’ll never see him again. Tears, tears and more tears. Where do they all come from.

Take care.
Joan x

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Sorry Sheila. I meant to say I hope the day of your wedding anniversary is not too painful for you. My thoughts are with you.

Joan x

That is the worst thing, I can’t get used to it, it hurts so much

Dear Joan

I have not moved any of Ian’s T-shirts, they are still lying on the bedside cabinet where he left them. Some friends have told me to pack up his items but I have no intention of doing this for God knows how long. The empty seat opposite me is a crushing reminder every day that he is no longer here. I cry best part of a whole day, every day. I just so wish he was still here. All our hard work for all those years has been shattered, my world is destroyed. I have recordings of Ian with our little grandson and I often play them at night and weep. I would give anything to have him back.

I am sorry that you find yourself in the same place. I understand and share your feelings of loneliness. Even though I am in a support bubble with my son, his partner and our little grandson returning to the empty house just makes the pain of loosing Ian greater.

Thinking of you. Take care.
Sheila xxx

Hello Sheila
Reading these lovely messages just gets me into floods of tears, again. We are all hurting so much, but nothing helps ease our pain.
It helps to get out for a while, but the minute I walk through the front door the loneliness and silence hits so hard. Sometimes, I just don’t want to go home. I walk in and shout “I’m home” and I can hear his voice in my head. I walk around talking and shouting and just repeating the same thing WHY did you have to leave me, It’s killing me not to have him here with me where he belongs. We all want the same - to have them back in our lives.
How much longer do we have to suffer?

Thinking of you and your family too. God bless.
Joan xx

I quickly turn on the TV just for some noise, then sit and cry.


Hi Joan

I went out for food shopping this morning. Cried on my return to an empty house. The silence is deafening. I have tried leaving the TV on when I go out and it worked for a while. Everything is just a sticking-plaster. The weekends are the worst for me. My friend, Ian’s best friend and older brother-in-law all ring me weekly but this tends to be during the week. I sound ungrateful but I am not. Just the nights are long and the weekends even longer.

I find myself shouting at Ian quite alot then feel guilty. I sometimes wonder if that is why I cannot feel his presence. Also wondering why we worked so hard towards the goal of retirement only to have it stolen from us. I

I try not to think beyond the day I am in, as our future was taken from us.
Take care
Sheila xxx

Hi Sheila

Just saw this lovely quote:-

“Whenever I am missing you, I also remember how fortunate I was that you were in my life.
I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world.”



Hi Joan

Beautiful words. Thank you.

Sheila xxx

Life is not the same without you.
The sun still rises in the east and darkness falls at night.
But nothing now seems quite the same, each day is not so bright.
The birds still sing, the flowers grow, the breeze still whispers too.
But it will never, ever be the same world without you.
It’s so sad you had to go, your leaving caused so much pain.
But you were so very special and earth’s loss is heaven’s gain.



I Am Always With You

I thank you for the love you have shown,
But now is the time I travelled on alone.
So grieve for me a while, if grieve you must.
Then let your grief be comforted with trust
That it is only for a while that we must part.
So treasure the memories within your heart.
I won’t be far away for life goes on,
And if you need me, call me and I will come.
Though you can’t see or touch me, I will be near,
And if you listen with your heart,
You’ll hear all my love around you soft and clear.
And then when you come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile and a “Welcome Home


Two and a half years for me now. The pain is less raw but those terrible pangs still get to me. I always rush into the house, turn lights on and turn on tv. Going to bed is the worst when I turn all the lights off again and the silence is almost deafening. I always used to go to bed late but I knew he was there. Even then I used to check he was breathing and I just felt complete. I am just beginning to look at photos again and that is what ignites the tears. I miss him so much but time does help a little.


It really is so bloody hard isn’t it Angie … your just starting to look at your photos and that says it all after that long , 4 months and I still can’t look at a photo of my girl

Non stop tears and heartaches. The pain is not easing.