It’s been just over 5 months since I lost my husband, he was just 57 and it was unexpected and sudden. I’ve just gone into our garage to get his radio he used to listen to whilst working in there, as I thought I might take it away with me. Before I realised what I was doing I’d wiped away his fingerprints in the dust and now they are gone forever. It really upset me and I sobbed. Feeling really wretched and fragile again now.
Totally understand that. I was sitting and was sobbing over a bloody shoe this morning. He wrote them all the time. I was throwing some out and they feel out the bag. Needless to say they back in the wardrobe.
I am gradually giving away his suits. It is hard. I can understand they are back in the wardrobe.
The radio’s back in the garage.
I have taken all his clothes to recycling, except a few that have special memories. His shoes were the last to go.
His suits are all that are left apart from 2 jackets. Everything gone to charity shop. They like large sizes. As in everything else he bought in bulk. There were over 6 brand new shirts still in the packaging. Slippers he had never worn. I have an old pair of trousers that he wore around the house that i will keep.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Don’t beat yourself up
You are always going to have triggers
I’ve lost count the number of times I’ve gone to put something in the bin then thought, no I can’t throw it away!
I had a bag of shoes for the charity shop & ended up taking 3 pairs back out as I can’t bear to part with them!
I’ve given up sorting his clothes for now - it’s too upsetting x
It’s two years 9 months since my husband died. One so has taken a few clothes and a grandson has his last new suit but all the rest are in the wardrobe. I have been unable to part with them but my sons say to leave them and they will deal with them when necessary and I’m very grateful for that.
I still have all my wife’s shoes, clothes and other bits can’t get rid of them and never will it lets me think she is still here after 11 months
Exactly the same, i just cant get rid or move any of his stuff, maybe im just hoping its all been a nightmare and he’ll walk through the door tom. But it gives me comfort xx
I cant do any of that after 8 months ! I just cant bear to get rid of anything of his it feels too much like reality and i know it will make me cry - as my counsellor said theres no rush and you do it when its right for you xxx
Absolutely, we are all on our own journey, find what only we can do when we can do it. There are some clothes of special importance that are still in the wardrobe but most of it has gone.
Youre very brave … x
You have kind sons xx
Most of Norman’s clothes went the week he died. His brother and his wife were here and there was no way I could clear cupboards on my own. They went through like a swarm of locusts. They also moved a lot of stuff from high shelves to where I could reach. I HAD to think of the practicalities of how physically I was going to manage day to day however hard it was.
Thank you xx
I’ve left everything as it is for now, even her slippers are still under her bedside, I’m thinking about putting her best outfits in a suitcase and locking them away for now.
My husbands slippers are still in the downstairs toilet where he collapsed.
In the position they obviously left his feet.
Can’t bear to move them.
It’s been ten months since I lost my husband and the other day a charity bag was put through my door. Today I thought it was time to let go and put his shoes in the bag. I could hear him saying ‘ it’s only shoes ‘ but my heart was breaking as I put them in the bag. I was supposed to leave it on the doorstep tonight but it’s sitting in the hall, I just couldn’t do it, not yet.
Took me 6 weeks to get rid of the catheter bag she had when she died.
Even then I tapped it and sealed some in a vial before throwing it out.
You do what you got to do, however abnormal it may appear to the real world