I lost Mark in May . Just under 40 years of marriage. Miss him so much. He went to eork one day and didnt come home. He had no health issues. Its so hard to imagine i will never see him again , to hear his voice . I feel lonely … the pain is still there and i feel empty
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I feel the same as you. Take care
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Hi I was with my husband 43 years im empty he was taking from us suddenly and in my arms I think it happened I feel half a person now can’t even think how
My life will be without martin thinking of all you lovely people out there on your own now all I can say is try to keep your self busy
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My husband went after just one week in hospital I feel overwhelmed and devastated, it’s been nearly 6 weeks now.
Trying to keep busy but it takes enormous effort to do things, and I have to overcome panic if invited for coffee or a walk with a friend. I’m a shell of who I was before x
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I feel the same as you. Take care
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Hello lynne48.
It’s been 8 months since the loss of my wife.We were togeather for 40 years.
I might have an idea of how you are feeling,although we are all different.
In the early days I found keeping busy worked well for me,but I have run out of things to do and reality has set in.
The feeling of being alone can sometimes feel like fear,human beings suffer when isolated.
I find that the emotions can really take you by surprise not just by there suddeness but by the intensity.
I know that things will get better though,but the old me is never coming back.
People on this website seem pretty friendly,so you coming back to might be a good decision.
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I joined the u3a, national trust and the red hats just to give me a reason to leave the house.
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Good moves! What is the red hats? Xx
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Someone told me everyone dies, as if you should just pull yourself together. I hope things get better in time for you.
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That’s pretty harsh, I think we know that but not a great comment when we are going through our grief. What are people like, don’t listen, take care of yourself x
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I understand where you are coming from, it will be 18 months on the 21st since my husband passed away, its true, its an aloneness, with the best will in the world, your children will go back to their lives, and rightly so, friends do their very best but they cant move in with you, its the most hugh adjustment to being alone !! I personally have found this year harder than last, as if last year was a practice run !! Im hoping the next will be easier, sending all good wishes and hope for the future x
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I agree it’s the loneliness and not having that special person by your side, friends and family go back to their worlds (just as it should be). It’s heartbreaking isn’t it, take care x
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How harsh can some people be! Those remarks are so unhelpful and reveal a negative side of the speaker. Thankfully most people have so much empathy for what you and all of us are feeling. Sending hugs x
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Absolutely Mansell2004, I too have found this second year to have got increasingly difficult to somehow keep going. The first year is just a vague and blurry sort of memory. I think I was in shock, numb, dazed. During this second year it is like I have awoken into the most ghastly nightmare existence. My feelings of loss and aloneness are now in sharp focus. It is now incredibly hard to keep going. It makes no sense to me. I still cannot believe that my beloved Christine has died. I find my self wondering around the house saying out loud “I don’t understand what has happened. Why is she not here?” It’s very tough.
But finding this forum has been a source of comfort and relief; the shared experiences and understanding.
Best wishes to all.
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Reading this it’s like reading my own thoughts exactly! The first year one gets pulled along on a kind of adrenaline fuelled dream, shock, funeral, probate, coping with the loss, etc., etc. Then this awful reality hits you so hard that they have really gone and that It’s a myth that time heals. Time does however change things and the only thing is to grab on to whatever little bits of friendship and joy that come your way. I find many days are like watching a film of yourself and hoping it will soon end and I can go home! Sending hugs x
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Thank you.
Thank you for your kind thoughts. The person who made the remark has yet to go through what we have.
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Being alone is the worst I lost my husband of 38 years in July and felt very alone at the weekend despite being surrounded by people
Just trying now to get get life back on track
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Weekends do seem to be the worse not sure how to get over that hurdle, it’s a new life we have been handed with no rules to follow, we just have to muddle through. I hope to find an answer but it’s very hard, be kind to yourself you will get there x
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Both myself & my daughter miss my dad so much. He passed away in August. Its only after he died that I truly realised how he must have felt when my mother died when I was 13. She was the love of his life. Take care
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