The physical effects of grief

[Wilson9]

Another interesting video by Sarah Bell. This one delves into the effect grief has on our brains and bodies.

Worth watching.

Physical Effects of Grieving

[Helen39]

Thank you Wilson

I do think it helps to understand why we feel like we do x

[Wilson9]

Thanks for posting @Helen39

I’m sure there are a lot of grievers who are experiencing these physical symptoms. I, for one, have had several bouts of chest pain since my wife died. It got so bad at one point that I was admitted to hospital to get tested for heart attack, angina etc.. All tests came back negative thankfully. The incident happened a few days before the first anniversary of my wife’s death so they put it down to grief related stress.

I posted something the other day titled “Grief changes us” which I thought you might like to have a look at.

Grief changes you

We live in an era that idolises control. From an early age, we are conditioned to organise, plan, manage and anticipate. We believe that if we try hard enough, we can manage, not only our commitments, but also our emotions, our relationships and even the course of our existence. Culture teaches us that vulnerability is weakness and that feeling too much is a kind of deviation from the norm. We create routines, lists, methods and distractions to protect ourselves from the unpredictable but then d…

[Helen39]

Thank you. It’s been 9 months for me now and people do expect you to be better. I’ve just had that conversation with our son who last week said”not this again” when I got upset after he’d been rather sharp. Today he said I needed counselling. I tried to explain it’s missing his dad, the stress of selling the house and him not speaking to his sister. No councillor and is going to fix those things.

Blooming heck, life is hard on your own. Onwards, I’ve a fence to repair and hedges to cut. Now to work out how to change the drill bit. Thank goodness for YouTube x

[Norma1]

My sister has just suggested I get counselling because I just burst into tears when she referred to my deceased partner’s things as just “stuff”. We were discussing giving some of it to charity. I was shocked as she’s been really helpful since he died. I just feel that nobody really understands how I feel except for the people on this forum. People are expecting me to have moved on a bit now after six and a half months. I think they find my grief makes them uncomfortable. Her reaction has just made me feel even more lonely and lost.

[Helen39]

Dear Norma

I’m sure your sister didn’t mean to be unsympathetic. My sister says the most unbelievable things (I worry she has dementia) grieving is horrendous but I know I’m extremely sensitive to anything that sounds like a criticism. I also know that when I can’t sleep my brain seems to blow everything out of proportion. I try to tell myself to think about it in the morning, nothing I can do about it now.

I sound like my mum (a very wise woman)

Sending you a hug, sleep well x